Tenderness & Rage
by OneTartBabe
Summary: Steph's been casually dating a new man who sets her up in the worst way.  The Merry Men will come to her rescue building friendships, re-establishing trust, and uniting them as the best kind of family - the chosen family.
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's Note: ** Just couldn't get this story out of my head. I, obviously, like a damsel in distress story. This story is rated M for a reason, lots of dark subject matter and violence. Please heed that warning going forward. There will also be tons of friendship and a touch of romance, later (much later). This is a tart pairing and we won't see much of Ranger or Joe, though neither of them are hurt in this story. I don't have ton of free time these days so will most likely only be updating this story once a week or so, normally I like to do more frequent updates but can't commit to that, sorry. As always I appreciate reviews, comments, and ideas. Thanks so much for reading!_

**Chapter 1 - Tank's POV**

Hector, Lester, Bobby, and I were playing poker. It was our usual Wednesday night activity. We opened it up to anyone from RangeMan who wanted to come and other folks did come and go on occasion but the four of us never missed a week. We always met at my house, Bobby did the majority of the cooking, though Hector and Les helped out sometimes with that too.

It was a way that we all connected and let go. Meeting at my house meant that we didn't get interrupted by any RangeMan business and to be honest for just a few hours each week we kind of forgot about security and the military, and the ugliness we dealt with on a weekly basis. We kicked back told tall tales about women and played cards, no discussion about work was ever permitted.

We started playing weekly right after Ranger left for Miami about three months ago. The additional responsibility of running the Trenton office and wanting to change the atmosphere a little so we could have a more relaxed camaraderie instead of chain of command led to the games. It turned out to be a great thing for us and did allow the rest of the staff to see us as people not robotic commanding officers.

Steph even joined us on occasion. It seemed that if she announced that she was coming we had better attendance from the rest of the staff. She didn't always tell folks ahead of time and I had to admit that those were my favorite nights, the nights when I could have more of her attention to myself. She often stayed after everyone left and helped me clean up and it was in those moments that my feelings towards her grew by leaps and bounds. There was no denying her beauty and kind heart but there was so much else to her. I hadn't been man enough to admit my feelings, however; and now she was casually dating a firefighter. If he was dumb enough to screw up or set her free, I was ready to step in.

We were happily playing, Lester especially happy as he'd won the first few hands when there was a frantic knock at my door. It wasn't unusual for folks to come in a little late so I figured it was a fellow RangeMan joking around but still I grabbed my gun as I looked out the peephole to see who was there. Instead of one of the guys it was Stephanie and she looked like she'd been beaten, she had her coat and arms wrapped around her tightly her expression dazed and frightened.

I opened the door quickly, tucking the gun into the back of my pants. Her wide and frantic eyes met mine as I tried to quickly take her in. "Tank, help me." Her voice hitched as she stepped forward into my outstretched arms. She fell into me as I picked her up.

"Bobby!" I slammed the door behind me carrying her into my living room.

Steph's breath was ragged, her chest heaving with exhaustion as she wrapped her arms around my neck. "I don't think he followed me, but I'm not sure."

Lester and Hector heard her words and drew their weapons as they checked out windows looking for any threats. No one knew what was happening but the air was charged as we tried to figure out what happened to this women we all treasured so much and make sure we weren't coming under attack.

I laid Steph out on the couch as Bobby ran out to his rig to grab his medical bag, Lester and Hector covering him just in case. Steph's eyes were closed as she tried to catch her breath. I took a second to quickly scan her body. Her feet were bare and filthy like she'd walked miles on the pavement to get here, small scratches and blood dotting her toes. Her legs were bare, her coat coming to mid-thigh covering the rest of her body. Her fingers clamped around mine the second I set her down, obviously wanting to feel some connection. Her nails were broken and I could see scratches and defensive wounds marring her slender, pale fingers.

Touching her cheek I caused her to flinch and open her eyes. "It's okay Little Girl, it's just me, Tank. You're safe now." A tear slipped out of her blue eyes as she nodded at me. She leaned into my touch just a bit then, allowing me to calm just slightly. Her face had taken more than a few blows from someone's fists, her face was red and swollen, her lips cracked and bleeding.

"Little Girl, what happened?" My voice was barely a whisper as I looked into her eyes my mind racing between utter despair at her emotional and physical state and pure rage as I thought about the person who had done this to her.

Bobby knelt down beside her as Lester and Hector looked on, both of their faces anguished as they looked at the women who was their sister and dear friend. Lester looked at me, the anger simmering behind his eyes. "It's all clear." Despite not seeing any threat outside his body was on full alert as he stayed prepared for whatever might be coming.

I stood up and tried to move out of Bobby's way when Steph's grip tightened on my hand. "Stay close." She whispered as her eyes flickered between the four of us surrounding her on the couch.

Nodding, I moved to stand behind the couch, keeping her hand in mine. It allowed me to stay close something I wanted to do and something she obviously needed while also giving Bobby some room to work.

Bobby looked at her, his hands resting on the couch next to her body. His eyes were compassionate as they met hers. "Bomber, can I look you over? Where are you hurt?"

She looked at him and gave a brave smile as she nodded. She didn't say anything and as much as I knew that I needed to extend as much patience and tenderness as possible to her, I was itching to know the full details so I could take care of whoever had done this to her.

Bobby started feeling her scalp no doubt looking for any signs of a concussion. He worked slowly and carefully, Steph flinching occasionally, her eyes full of tears. Using his penlight Bobby carefully pulled open her swollen eyes and tested her reflexes. "It doesn't look like you have any signs of a concussion, Steph." He smiled at her, his hands resting on her shoulders. "Can I look at the rest of you? Can you tell us what happened?"

Steph's eyes looked at him for a second then moved to look at Hector, Lester, and I. Her vulnerability was palpable in the air around us. We all wanted to ease her mind, but Hector spoke up first. "We can leave you alone with Bobby, Chica. The rest of us don't have to watch." Steph was a modest woman and Hector was right to offer her some privacy though admittedly it would be hard for me to leave her right now.

Her grip tightened on my hand as her breath increased. She was getting more upset by the second. Lester jumped in quickly, she was his best friend and it was no doubt killing him to watch her in such a state. "Beautiful, just tell us what you need, what you want and we'll do it. We can turn our backs, we can leave or we can stay. Whatever you need, just tell us." He spoke for all of us I gave her hand a small squeeze, my thumb running over her knuckles trying to reassure her silently that I would do whatever she needed.

"I don't know, I don't know what I need." Her voice was shaking as her eyes held mine. "He said Damien paid him to hurt me." The words came out of her just before a giant sob and tears fells from her cheeks. Damien was the firefighter she had been dating and the news that he had put her in harm's way forced a low growl from my throat, I heard other growls too and knew that Damien was going to be in a world of hurt before the night was over.

Lester stepped back, pulling his cell phone from his belt. I knew without asking that he was calling the RangeMan control room to have Damien picked up as quietly as possible. We didn't have the full story yet but we would get it from Steph as she was ready and we'd be sure to make Damien fill in any holes while we avenged whatever harm he'd done to her.

Bobby touched Steph's neck gingerly, there were a few scratches there that he cleaned gently but still the sting of the antiseptic made Steph hiss. "I'm sorry, Steph. Can you tell us who hurt you? How he hurt you? I just want to make sure you're okay, honey. Just want to take care of your injuries and make you feel better." Bobby was a superb medic but his compassion with Steph when she was injured never ceased to amaze me. He always took time to wait for her permission to touch her and explain everything in detail knowing that she did better when she understood everything and had some measure of control over what was happening.

She shook her head, her mind obviously racing and trying to make sense of whatever trauma she had endured tonight. Bobby's hands gently touched her arm and pushed up the sleeve of her coat watching her closely for any signs of resistance. He wasn't going to push her beyond her comfort zone but he was concerned and wanted to examine her for injuries. As the sleeve slid up we all saw obvious hand shaped bruises around her wrist and forearm.

Sliding his hands up her shoulders, Bobby placed his hands on the collar of her coat. "Bomber, can I take your coat off, look at the rest of you? I won't hurt you, you know, you're safe here." His hand rested against the top of her head as he searched her eyes and tried to give her comfort.

She let go of my hand at the question, folded her body up into a fetal position and turned her face into the back of the couch. She was crying and simultaneously breaking all of our hearts. My mind was racing with all the possibilities, I wasn't a stupid man, I'd worked in the military and with scum on the streets long enough to know what she'd most likely been through tonight but I kept hoping that she'd somehow been spared from the ultimate ugliness and violation.

All those hopes of denial on my part when out the window when she spoke next, her voice thick with tears but still a whisper. "I'm naked under my coat." I looked at my friends and watched as each of their eyes flashed with anger, their hands curling up into fists at their sides. No one wanted to scare the woman on my couch any more than she already was so everyone was exercising as much control as possible to keep their rage coiled up inside but we all knew what was simmering under the surface.

I ran my knuckle down her cheek, she opened her eyes and made eye contact with me. "Stephanie, were you raped?" The question sent chills throughout my body and I could see the rest of our friends rolling their shoulders and necks at the bristling question. Despite not wanting to ask we needed to know, needed to know what kind of care to get her and what kind of hell we were going to unleash on Damien and the man who'd done this to her.

"I had a few drinks with Damien. I was a little tipsy, I couldn't fight him off like you all taught me, I tried but he was too strong and I didn't have my stun gun or panic button because I thought I would be with Damien all night." She wasn't answering the question directly but her rationalizations and almost self-blame confirmed my suspicions. Not taking care of her was a big enough offense for me to beat Damien to a pulp but intentionally putting her in harm's way meant that he was going to face a very long, painful death.

Despite the anger I felt, I forced my voice to be gentle and calm while I talked to the tiny, frightened woman on my couch. "Little Girl, you didn't do anything wrong. We just need to know what kind of care to get you. You can tell us anything and you know we won't let anyone hurt you now." I took a deep breath and met her eyes again, wanting to reassure her that she could tell us. "Did he rape you?"

She moved to sit herself up with a wince, her body obviously aching. She curled up into the corner of the couch, trying to keep herself covered with her coat, her fingers were wrapped around my forearm as she kept my hand in her lap. We all watched her with baited breath, we all knew what was coming but still tried to brace ourselves for her answer.

"Yes, he did. I was raped. When he was done with me, I ran all the way here." Her answer came out in a long whoosh of air. She started to sob and shake uncontrollably. Her words and the sight of her so broken caused a pain inside me like I'd never known, worse than any torture or injury I had previously endured.

I couldn't take it any more and moved to sit next to her on the couch, hoping that she'd let me comfort her in some way, let me wrap my arms around her. I put my arm around her shoulder and was surprised but pleased when she climbed onto my lap. She pulled her knees up alongside her and made herself as tiny as possible against my chest. Her arms wrapped around my waist, her hands fiercely gripping at my sides as she cried into my neck. I sshed and rubbed her back, whispering words of comfort and promising her that she was safe now.

Bobby stood up and started making phone calls. I assume he wanted to have a rape kit run but didn't want to do that himself, wanted to get her specialized care and that he knew the right person to contact for that. Hector and Lester sat on either side of me on the couch, each of them reaching out for Steph cautiously not wanting to scare her but at the same time needing to find a way to touch and reassure her and themselves at the same time.

I knew we all wanted more of the story, wanted to know details about her attacker, how far she had run to get here and how she knew Damien had set her up for this brutal attack. However, getting her medical care was the most important thing at the moment. I didn't want to lose too much time in getting the information we needed but at the same time I didn't want to force her too much or too quickly to give us information. Too much had been forced on her tonight and I only wanted to give her comfort and safety.

"Bomber, I called your gynecologist." Bobby knelt in front of us again. I knew the gynecologist had already been vetted by Bobby and knew that it was a good choice. "She's going to meet us at her office in 15 minutes and she'll examine you. Is that okay?"

It was a smart choice on Bobby's part, the gynecologist wouldn't be required to report it like an emergency room would and we could keep this out of the 'Burg grapevine as well as keep the police out of it and handle her rapist our way.

"Will you all stay with me?" She looked at each of us, needing reassurance that she was going to be safe.

Hector smiled and leaned forward slowly to kiss her forehead. "Of course, Chica. You'd have to shoot us to make us leave you alone right now." He smiled trying to joke but we all knew he was deadly serious. There was no way we were going to leave her side tonight.

Steph nodded and moved slowly to get off my lap and stand up. I stood up with her wanting to make sure to give her tired body any support it might need. When her feet touched the ground she hissed and leaned back into my body. I picked her up cradling her against my chest, "What is it Steph?"

"My feet. They really hurt and burn." Bobby moved quickly to examine them, his jaw clenching as he reined in his emotions.

"You have quite a few cuts on your soles, Bomber. How far did you run in your bare feet?" He grabbed a few antiseptic wipes to clean off the dirt and hopefully disinfect the cuts.

"Damien had taken me to The Bluemoon. I guess I ran all the way from there, I don't know how far that is." Steph was completely dazed as she spoke but I took it as a good sign that she was willing to give us information and was glad for every detail or lead we could follow up on quickly. Still the Bluemoon is over five miles away and the fact that she ran all that way on city streets in her bare feet only served to increase the rage boiling in my bloodstream.

I carried Steph out to the rig, keeping her in my lap in the backseat, Bobby sitting next to us. Lester drove as Hector called RangeMan headquarters. I heard him speaking rapidly in Spanish ordering teams to be sent to The Bluemoon. No one wanted to make Steph the center of any gossip but at the same time we knew every soldier inside RangeMan would want to help get who ever had hurt the woman who drew us all together as family.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 - Steph's POV**

"Alright, Stephanie, we're all done." Dr. Susan Gordon patted my knees and smiled as me. She lowered the stirrups before helping me sit up on the table. She sat down on a chair next to me. "You have extensive bruising as I'm sure you can feel. There was some vaginal tearing, I gave you a few stitches but those will dissolve on their own."

I couldn't control the sob that left my body at that news but tried to stifle it by putting my hand over my mouth. She wasn't telling me anything I didn't know, didn't feel happening to me but hearing it confirmed just continued to chip away at my emotional state. I didn't know how I would ever feel safe or whole again. Susan gave me a sad smile, giving me a second to rein in my emotions. I nodded and encouraged her to go on.

"I'm going to give Bobby a prescription for some antibiotics just in case. I'll run your blood sample for any potential diseases in the meantime." My attacker hadn't worn a condom and the idea that he might have given me some kind of venereal disease only added to the hysteria that was building in my brain. "Your birth control will prevent any pregnancy from this. I'm so sorry for what you're going through, do you have any questions for me? Anything else I can do for you right now?"

I shook my head, unsure of anything - questions or next steps. The only thing I could think of was getting out of this hospital gown, taking a shower, and slipping into some comfortable clothes before falling asleep.

"I can give you a sedative to help you sleep tonight. I'm sure Bobby could too. You're going to be very sore, I'm sure you already are but even more sore tomorrow, don't be afraid to ask Bobby if you need something for the pain." She touched my knees and waited for me to respond.

"No sedatives, thank you. I imagine the guys need me to give them some more details before I fall asleep." I rubbed my hands over my face, I didn't really want to share details with the guys but I knew it would need doing, that they were going to want to get the man who did this to me if they could.

Dr. Gordon nodded and smiled. "Want me to bring them in here? They're all waiting right outside the door."

I let out a small sigh. I hadn't wanted the guys in here while she examined me. They promised they would stay close and that I was safe, I didn't doubt that of course but it still made me feel better knowing they were all so close by. When I started running from the bar, from my attacker I didn't have a plan didn't truly know where I was going until I was at Tank's front door. Thankfully my brain acted on instinct knowing that I was always safe with Tank.

"Yes, I'd like to tell them a few things then take a shower." My emotions were all over the map, I was trying hard not to be hysterical knowing that I needed to keep it together for a just a while longer.

She wrapped a blanket around my shoulders before opening the door and letting the guys file into the small room. I hadn't realized I was shivering and cold but the blanket gave me much needed warmth. Tank sat down next to me on the examination table and I instantly gravitated to him. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and held me close into his side. I leaned my head onto his shoulder just wanting to feel the safety I knew he would provide.

I rested my shaking hand on his leg, comforted by his solid strength next to me. Trying to will my body to stop shaking, I looked at the guys briefly. I was not really surprised to see Hector and Lester holding hands their eyes sad, jaws clenched as they looked at me. Their relationship was still new but it was obvious that they were deeply bonded despite the lack of time together. Seeing Lester in a committed relationship was astouding enough but seeing him do so with a man still shocked me, though I was happy for them both and the love they were building made me happy.

I was surprised to see Bobby's arm around my doctor's shoulder but it explained why he was able to get in touch with her so quickly during off-hours. He had a fierce, protective grip on her as the muscles of his jaw worked at controlling his temper. I wondered briefly if anyone else had been aware of their relationship because it hadn't yet made the gossip rounds at RangeMan.

Shaking my head, I tried to force myself to leave denial land and focus on the terrible task at hand. "I don't know who the man who raped me is." I kept my eyes on Tank's large, dark hand which had covered mine on his leg, unable to look at them fearing that I would completely break down if I didn't maintain some focus and distance from my emotions. "He grabbed me when I went to the ladies room and pulled me outside and into a car. He said that Damien had paid him to give me a rough time so that Damien could play my hero. " My voice hitched as the full weight of that statement hit me again, the full knowledge that someone I trusted, liked even had paid a man to hurt me on some level. Damien didn't likely intend for it to go this far but he obviously wasn't looking out for me either.

"Take your time, Beautiful." I looked up at Les' green eyes and he gave me a small supportive smile, I could feel his anger but knew that he was trying to keep it hidden from me.

Inhaling a deep breath, I felt Tank give me a little squeeze and tried to gather my courage from him. "He said he wanted more than what Damien offered and was going to take it." I couldn't stop my tears or sobs no matter how hard I tried. Thinking of how I tried to fight back but couldn't through the haze of alcohol and my attackers superior strength did nothing to assuage my feelings of terror and helplessness. "I tried to stop him, but i just couldn't get an upper hand, I screamed but no one heard me."

"It's alright Little Girl, it's not your fault. You're safe now." Tank rested his chin on my head as his hand rubbed my shoulder.

"Is that enough, do you need anything else? I'd really like to take a shower and sleep." I was hanging on by a thread but was doing my best to be strong. I didn't want to share details of the attack itself with them, with anyone really, and hoped they wouldn't push for that.

"Bomber, just a few questions then we'll stop I promise." Bobby's knuckles were turning white from the force of his grip on Susan's shoulder as he spoke. "Can you tell us anything about the car you were pulled into? Would you recognize the man who raped you?" He closed his eyes with the last question and I realized that my friends were angry but also hurt by what had happened to me. I expected their anger but not the depth of their anguish.

I shook my head. "It was a four door beyond that I don't know much. I know that's not very helpful I'm sorry. I think I'd recognize him if I saw him again, though." The guys all nodded their heads just slightly, I think they had more questions but knew they were trying to be gentle. "Can I ask a question?"

"Si, of course Chica." Hector responded quickly even stepping forward to place his hand on my knee.

"Do you think Damien did this, really? Did he really set me up to be raped?" I was still having a hard time wrapping my brain around the fact that he would put me in such danger. It was tough to believe that Damien would do something like this but at the same time it seemed like too ridiculous of a story for my rapist to have completely made up, why say anything at all?

I felt more than heard Tank's growl as he thought about my question. I watched each of them, as they thought about my question. Lester was the first to respond. "I don't know Beautiful, but we're going to talk with him and find out." His voice was hard and colder than I could ever remember hearing it and it suddenly made me feel afraid even though I knew it was directed at me.

Tank felt the shiver work through my body and pulled me closer to him. "It's okay, Steph. We will talk to Damien and see what he knows. If he did, we'll find out who the man is that hurt you and make Damien very sorry." His voice was soft but angry and I knew that he was going to do everything in his power to make me safe from these men who hurt me tonight.

"You won't hide anything from me, right? You'll tell me whatever you discover." I was terrified but I didn't want to be kept in the dark or protected for my own good either.

Lester smirked, even chuckled a bit. "Of course not Beautiful, we'll keep you informed, but I think it's time for you to get some rest now."

I nodded and then wondered where I would go. My panic must have shown on face because Hector leaned down and cupped my cheeks gently. "What is it Steph?"

"Where I am going go? Damien knows where I live and I don't want to see him. The man who raped mehas my purse what if he finds my apartment?" I sniffed back some tears trying to control my hysteria. The idea of my rapist returning was too much and quickly pierced my thin veil of control and strength.

"Shh, Little Girl." Tank kissed my temple. "You're coming back to my house. Ella has already brought over some clean clothes and supplies for you. We aren't going to let anyone else hurt you and I'm not letting Damien Robbins anywhere neare you ever again." His voice was a deadly whisper and I knew I could believe every word.

I let out a deep sigh of relief as Tank stood up and lifted me into his arms. "I can walk." I was dead on my feet but didn't want to be babied either.

"You need to stay off those cuts on your feet for a bit Steph." Bobby placed his hand on my forearm as he met my eyes, letting me know he didn't want me to argue.

I nodded and watched as he turned to face my doctor. "Hal is going to follow you home. I'll call you later.

She shook her head and smiled. "That's not necessary."

"It is to me, tonight." Bobby grasped her shoulders and kissed her forehead before leading us all outside.

Hal was standing outside the main office door and I hid myself into Tank's neck, whispering in his ear. "Does everyone at RangeMan know that I screwed up yet again?"

Tank let out a small growl and held me closer to him. "You didn't screw up Steph. I'm going to keep telling you that until you believe it. The guys at RangeMan know you were hurt and they're hunting for Damien but only the four of us know the details and we won't share those."

"Thank you." It wasn't nearly enough but it was all I had to offer at the moment.

I rode on Tank's lap back to his house, the drive made in total silence. I couldn't find my voice and it wasn't at all unusual for the guys to be quiet in the car. I found myself just trying to stay calm and focus on the rhythm of Tank's chest rising and falling as he breathed against my body.

Arriving at Tank's house, one of the Merry Men had already put Rex up in Tank's bedroom, leaving the door closed so that Tank's cats didn't torture my little pet. Tank and Bobby helped me into the bathroom. They had a shower stool in there for me to sit on, wanting me to stay off my feet as much as possible. "The four of us are right downstairs Steph. Holler if you need anything but I promise you're safe here." Tank was bent at the waist looking into my eyes as I sat on the shower stool still in my hospital gown.

I nodded and he kissed my forehead before leaving with Bobby and shutting the door behind them. Throwing the hospital gown off I turned the water on as hot as I could stand it and sat underneath the spray. Ella had brought my favorite soap and shampoo which I used with a vengeance scrubbing and rubbing my skin as hard as I could causing a few of the scratches on my skin to break open. As I worked to remove all memory of the rape from my skin I couldn't stop the wailing sobs that came from my body. I tried to keep quiet, tried not to let the guys hear but could not control it any more than I could control the sun's rise.

It wasn't until the water ran cold that I turned it off. I dried off and put on the panties and pajamas Ella had brought for me. Looking in Tank's mirror I was shocked at my own appearance. My arms were dotted with hand shaped bruises that I knew matched the ones on my hips and thighs. My eyes were nearly swollen shut, my cheeks bruised and the scratches on my neck stretched underneath my tank top and onto my breasts. Some of the scratches were still bleeding from my marathon scrubbing but I was quickly growing too tired to deal with them.

Stepping away from the mirror I shivered and knew that I would need something warmer than this tank top for tonight. I opened the door and hollered for Tank. He appeared within seconds making me think that he was sitting at the bottom of his stairs listening for any sound that meant I needed something.

"Let me carry you into bed." He said as he approached my body leaning in the door frame. His eyes registered shock as he looked at my arms. "Steph you're bleeding. I'm going to call Bobby up here to look at these ok?"

I sighed but nodded knowing that I needed to let Bobby tend to my wounds and let Tank carry me because I was unsure that my legs would carry me even a step let alone down the hall. "Ok, do you have a sweatshirt I could put on top of my shirt? I'm so cold." He picked me up forcing another sigh to leave my lips as I felt the safety of his arms envelope me.

He nodded against my temple. "Of course, Little Girl. As soon as Bobby finishes looking at these scratches I'll have one for you put on." He placed me on his bed before calling down the steps for Bobby.

Bobby wiped up my scratches and applied some ointment to the soles of my feet and arms before reminding me that if I needed anything for the pain that he would just be downstairs and ready to help. After Bobby left, Tank helped me put on the much too large sweatshirt before helping me crawl under the covers of his spacious bed.

Tank sat on the bed next to me and pulled the covers around me tighter. His hand caressing my hair as he looked into my eyes. The pain I saw in his eyes hurt me, I didn't like being the cause of it. "I'm sorry Tank. I'll be okay, you know me I bounce back quick." I wasn't sure that I would bounce back from this but I needed a way to reassure him, I didn't want him to worry so much.

"Stephanie Plum, you have nothing to be sorry for and don't you worry about me. I'm going to help you get through this but you don't need to be strong or to pretend that you're okay just to spare my feelings. I'm here for you, we're all here for you - don't you forget that or try to pretend that this didn't happen." His dark brown eyes pierced my soul and despite everything that happened tonight I felt such gratitude to have him to turn too. I nodded and he leaned to kiss my forehead.

I closed my eyes feeling so very exhausted. The bed moved as Tank stood up and I panicked grabbing his hand. "Where are you going?"

He squeezed my hand. "I was going to let you rest, that's all. I'll be downstairs with the rest of the guys. We won't let anyone in here, Steph, you are safe." The guys kept telling me I was safe and while I knew they meant it, knew they wouldn't let someone hurt me I felt anything but safe at the moment.

"Can you stay in here for a little while, please?" It felt so needy and clingy to ask but the idea of being separated from him was beyond terrifying to me.

Tank squeezed my hand again and nodded. "I'll sit right here." He pointed to a large armchair in the corner. "Get some rest Steph."

I watched him settle in the chair, propping his socked feet up on the stool in front of the chair. He kept his eyes on me as I watched him breathing there. I took immense comfort in his presence knowing that He would indeed watch over me as I slept. He gave me a small smile as my eyelids started to fall and my body gave into the exhaustion it had endured.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Author's Note: **This is why I stay away from fanfiction – it's such an addition I can't help myself. Another chapter and early at that, instead of promising updates on the weekends, I'm just going to promise them as they're done. They might be steady they might not, but I do promise this story will be completed – I won't leave ya hanging. Thanks so much for the reviews and comments!_

_**Much thanks to Cristi0819**, my super fantastic beta starting with this chapter! You rock, thanks so much for your advice and patience with my grammar issues._

_**Chapter 3 - Tank's POV**_

As I watched Stephanie sleeping in my bed, I felt rage about what had been done to her. Thinking about what she had been through even forced some bile to rise from my stomach. I pushed it all down. There would be time for me to let the rage out later, but right now I just needed to keep watch over her and make sure she received all the tenderness and support possible in order to hopefully recover.

I had plenty of training and I knew that most rape victims lost something of themselves after their trauma. Most were able to move on with a normal life with counseling and support but certain aspects of their personality always changed. It broke my heart to think of Stephanie not being the carefree, trusting woman I had come to adore. I was going to make sure Damien paid painfully for destroying that for her.

Lester and Hector had taken the bed in my guest room. I was still adjusting to their very new relationship and to Lester being with a man, but it seemed to make them both happy. If anything, Lester seemed lighter than I could ever remember. I would never have suspected him of being in the closet and maybe he didn't truly know himself until Hector came along, but the two of them together seemed right and their relationship softened both of their edges.

Bobby crashed on the couch after making sure Hal had gotten Susan home alright. I overheard him talking to her on the phone, making sure she'd locked her doors. I also heard him call the control room and order a few more patrols past her house tonight. Steph's rape was making Bobby even more protective than usual. It seemed that none of us were willing to be too far away from the beautiful woman sleeping in my bed, even if the rest of them had other places to be and people to be with.

I stretched out in the chair, allowing my body to get a little rest. I didn't need much, but I knew I would want my energy when we found Damien and the man who had attacked her tonight. A few hours passed when my vibrating phone woke me. I slipped outside the door to answer it, not wanting to wake Steph.

The screen let me know it was Cal, who was supposed to be out looking for Damien. "Report," I barked out.

"We found Damien Robbins, but he's inside the fire station. We can't get to him without alerting the other firefighters inside and we didn't think you wanted that kind of battle to ensue." Cal's voice was soft and angry.

"Stay there until your shift is over, but don't leave until someone shows up to relieve you. I want a tail on Robbins until further notice. Notify each team that he should be picked up if the chance presents itself." Damien Robbins would never be allowed near Stephanie again, I had promised her that at her doctor's office and I meant it. I would keep him from her by any and all means necessary. I hung up the phone and allowed my fingers to curl up into fists at my side. I wanted to break something, put my fist through the wall, do something, anything to relieve a little bit of the tension and rage I was feeling.

I paced for a few minutes before using the bathroom, not surprised to see that Steph had tossed her hospital gown into the trashcan. Going into the kitchen, I grabbed a couple of bottles of water to take back into the bedroom. Steph was still asleep when I returned but she was more restless now, her body tossing and turning, a few small moans escaping her bruised body. I expected nightmares, but still hoped she'd be free of any.

Taking my place back in my chair, I continued to watch her and sip a little water. I would give anything I had to remove this anguish from her, to erase this terrible night from her memory, but knew that I couldn't. However, I was resolved to do anything she needed to help her feel confident and safe again.

Steph sat up with a start, a small scream escaping her throat, breaking me free from my thoughts. I turned the bedside lamp on and rushed to her. "It's okay, Steph. You're here with Tank, it's just a dream." Her eyes were mostly swollen shut as she tried to make sense of her surroundings. She reached out for me and I latched onto her hand hoping that she would be reassured by my touch.

"Tank?" Her voice was breathless and my name came out as a sob.

"That's right little girl, it's me. It's Tank." My heart broke as she started to cry uncontrollably. She hadn't really broken down since she arrived at my door. We all heard her crying in the shower, but we had expected more considering what she'd been through. Steph was tough, but her trust and body had been violated on so many levels tonight that I knew she would eventually need to break down and grieve the losses.

She tugged on my hand and moved on the bed which I took as a sign that she wanted me to sit next to her. I sat down and wrapped my arms around her wanting to give her comfort and security. "I'm scared. I'm sorry I'm so scared."

"It's alright, Steph. You can be scared. You should be scared after all that you've been through tonight. I'm here now and no one is going to hurt you." She moved to sit on my lap, tucking her head into my neck and wept. Her entire body shook, causing rage to burn through my blood. I comforted her the best I could, my hands running softly on her body as I tried to find words to make it better, but I knew that I couldn't make it all better and it tore a hole in my gut.

It seemed like she shook and cried for hours before finally taking in a calm, but still shuddering breath. "Damien did pay that man to harass me. I don't think he meant it to go this far, but he did do it. How could someone do something like that?"

"I don't know, Steph, but I will make him pay." And pay with his life, I thought, but didn't think she needed to hear that right now. "How do you know, what makes you so sure?" I held her into my chest as I leaned back on the head board.

"The third time we went out a man bothered me at this club we went to. It wasn't terrible, the guy was kind of jerk, but at the same time it seemed like he didn't know what he was doing. Damien stepped in and I felt like he overreacted. He punched the guy." She took a deep breath, her fingers rubbing my chest absentmindedly. "Later that night he kept asking me if he was my hero. He wanted to save me from that man tonight. It was some kind of warped way of making me cling to him. Still, he paid that man and then didn't come find me when things didn't go according to plan. He didn't help me at all."

She started to cry again as the fury inside me grew exponentially. I couldn't believe what I was hearing, but I knew Steph's instincts were always dead on. What kind of man pays another man to harass his woman? I would get my hands on Robbins soon and make him understand a whole new level of pain and fear.

"I'm so sorry Little Girl. I will make him pay and I will find the man who raped you. You will never have to be afraid of them again. I promise." I kissed her forehead and held her against my chest.

"I can't see very well." Her voice was tired. "What time is it?"

"Your eyes are really swollen, Little Girl. It'll get better as today goes on. It's about 6 AM." She let out a deep breath and nodded. "I need to use the bathroom and I'm a little hungry."

"Okay, I'll get you into the bathroom and then we'll see what we can make for breakfast." I moved her off my lap gently and stood up. "Want me to carry you?"

"No, just let me lean on you please." She stood up slowly, wincing the entire way before locking arms with me.

We walked slowly to the bathroom and I left her inside before going to wake Bobby. I heard Lester and Hector stirring too. I knew that everyone would hear the slightest noise and be on alert. Bobby was already in the kitchen working on coffee when I got downstairs. He looked at me, obviously still struggling with anger and anguish and asked, "How is she?"

"Her eyes are almost swollen shut." He grimaced, but nodded. "She said she's hungry, I'll take that as a positive sign." I added.

"I'll work on some pancakes. Ella brought everything I need to make up a batch." I was so glad Ella had planned ahead because I knew my kitchen would have the necessary ingredients on hand.

"Bobby, she's going to need something for the pain."

"Yeah, I'll give her some options after she eats a little something." He turned back around and began rummaging through my cabinets to make breakfast.

Lester and Hector appeared just as I heard the toilet flush. They both nodded as I ran upstairs to be there when she opened the door. She was going to need help walking down the steps. I didn't want her chancing a fall.

She opened the door and smiled when she saw me standing there. When she reached out for me I couldn't help but smile. I was trying not to touch her too much, wanting to make sure she was comfortable with any contact despite the incredible urge I had to do otherwise. I just wanted to keep my hands on her, reassure her that she was safe, and reassure myself that she was at least alive, the fact that she could have been hurt even worse or killed haunted me. Still, I knew most rape victims needed a little space and I was doing my best to give that to her, knowing that she was seeking my touch filled me with pride because I knew it meant that I had her deep trust.

"Bobby's making pancakes and then he can give you something for the pain." She smiled and nodded as I tucked her into my side. "Please be careful walking down the steps. I can carry you."

"No, I want to walk a little." Her independent spirit might be cracked a little right now, but I was glad that some of it was still intact, underneath the fragile shell.

We got to the kitchen slowly, she whimpered a bit as we walked down the stairs, making me realize that she was in more pain than she had let on. Hector and Lester approached her slowly, everyone realizing that she was likely to be jumpy. She smiled a little and said, "Morning guys, bet you never thought you'd see the day when I was awake at this hour."

Her joke made everyone chuckle a bit. I got her settled onto a chair as Lester fixed her a cup of coffee. "It's hot, Beautiful." He placed the cup against her hand, knowing that her swollen face made it hard for her to see.

She winced when the cup touched her bruised lip but gingerly took a sip and smiled. "Thanks. It's perfect, Les."

We tried not to hover as Bobby fixed breakfast. Everyone tried to keep the conversation light, but it was obvious that Steph was locked up inside her own mind. Lester's phone rang, the sound making Steph jump a little, her shaking hands spilling some coffee. He frowned as he stepped into the living room to answer the phone. Hector quickly wiped up the spilled coffee while whispering words of comfort to Steph.

I helped Bobby set the table before Lester appeared in the doorway and nodded to me. I followed him, knowing he wanted to be out of Steph's earshot. "Ram found Steph's purse in The Bluemoon parking lot. Her ID and phone were still in there but the credit cards and cash were gone. He'll bring it by later."

I nodded, glad to know that we could easily cancel her cards and hopefully it meant that her rapist didn't know where she lived. As soon as that thought crossed my mind, a growl escaped my throat. "She can't go back to living at that apartment, ever again."

Les nodded and clapped my shoulder. "If and when she's ready to try living on her own again, we'll cross that bridge with her. I don't see her leaving this house except to go to RangeMan for a long time, sadly." He let out a long, slow breath as he thought about how her independence had been taken from her. "We need to tell Ranger." Lester said.

"I know, but I want to talk to Steph first, see how she wants to handle it. I'll ask her if there's anyone else she wants us to tell, too." I leaned my head towards the kitchen. "Let's eat first and deal with this stuff on a full stomach."

We ate and watched Steph, hoping to hear one of her trademark moans, but none came. She didn't eat much, but did eat enough for us not to worry terribly about her physical strength. I don't think any of us were surprised that she didn't have much of an appetite. Bobby gave her some pain pills when she was done, with a promise that they wouldn't make her fuzzy, just take the edge off.

I got her situated on the couch when we were finished eating. I didn't want to upset her any more, but I knew we needed to talk about a few things. "Little Girl, is there anyone you want us to call? Anyone you want us to tell about what's happened?"

She shook her head quickly. "No. I might call Mary Lou or have her come here if that's okay, but I'll do it. I don't want you to tell people this kind of news. I don't want my family to know."

Taking a deep breath, I held her hand in mine. "Okay, we'll follow your lead. Of course, you can have Mary Lou here any time." I tried to hide the satisfaction I felt in understanding that she had no desire to leave my house for a while, that she was setting up camp in my home. My chest nearly puffed out with caveman satisfaction that Stephanie felt safe with me, in my home."

I took a deep breath, not really wanting to bring up Ranger, but on some level I knew she expected it. "We have to tell Ranger, Steph. I don't want to tell your secrets, so if you want to tell him that's fine, but we do have to keep him in the loop about what's going on in this office." Ranger, Les, Bobby, and I were equal partners in RangeMan now. Ranger wasn't the lone top dog, but as a partner, we did have to tell him what was happening and despite any lack of relationship with Steph, he would want to know.

Her grip on my hand increased at the question, but she simply nodded. "You can tell him. I don't want to talk to him right now and I don't want him coming here to help with this. Can you make him stay in Miami?"

Making Ranger do anything was impossible, but I thought I could convince him to stay away. "I'll do my best, Steph."

"Do you guys have other things to do today? Is babysitting me keeping you all from RangeMan business?" She was wringing her hands, which betrayed the nervousness she tried to keep from her voice.

Lester sat on a stool in front of her, taking both his hands in hers. I tried not to mourn the loss of her hand in mine and didn't possessively snatch it back from his grasp even though for a second I thought I might. He was going to talk to her, keep her distracted while I made the call to Ranger. "Beautiful, you are the most important thing we have in our lives and caring for you is RangeMan business. Some of us might move in and out today, but we are not going to leave you alone. Why don't you lie down and watch a movie? Get some rest."

As I stepped out of the living room, I watched him help her stretch out before sitting on the floor at her feet. Every single one of us was aching to do something to ease her torment. I sat behind the desk in my office and dialed Ranger. It was still early but I knew he'd be awake.

"Yo." Came his familiar greeting.

"Ranger." I let out a deep breath suddenly completely at a loss for words.

"What's up Tank?" It was uncharacteristic for Ranger to prompt me, but he could tell that something was wrong.

"I'm just going to come out with it. I'll apologize for being so blunt." He sucked in a breath on the other end of the line, no doubt expecting the worst. "Stephanie's new boyfriend set her up, we're not one hundred percent sure of the details yet. She was raped by a stranger in the parking lot of The Bluemoon last night."

He let out a fierce growl. "I'll be there this afternoon."

"No. She doesn't want you here right now. She's hanging on by a thread, Ranger. You need to stay away." I'm sure it hurt him to know that, but he had left her, he had decided he didn't want a relationship with her and I wasn't going to let him play her hero now. He'd screwed with her emotions enough over the years. It was unintentional, but still it had been done and she was too fragile for any confusion his presence might bring.

"Can I talk to her?" His voice was resigned. He didn't like it but, he would stay away.

I ran my hand over my head. "Not right now. She doesn't want to talk to anyone and I won't force her to. She's had too much forced on her in the last 18 hours."

We talked for 20 minutes and I gave him the few details we did know and promised to keep him in the loop. Just as I was about to hang up, he interrupted me. "When you find the man who raped her, I want a piece of him. When you're done, fly him to Miami. If you or she needs me in the meantime, I'm available anytime. Please let her know to call me when she's ready."

"Of course." I wasn't surprised by his words, that he wanted to help her or that he wanted to get his hands on her rapist. Flying the fucker to Miami would help us stay off the police radar because there was no doubt his days were numbered and that the last ones would be horrific beyond his worst nightmares. I didn't enjoy torture but knew that I would take special delight in unleashing the many things I'd learned over the years on the man who had hurt my Little Girl.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Again, much thanks to Crist0819 for her fantastic beta work.**_

_**Chapter 4 - Steph's POV**_

I was sitting on the couch between Lester and Hector when Tank came out of his office. I knew he was talking to Ranger and tried to gauge his emotions. It wasn't fair of me to ask him to drop that kind of bomb on someone, but I just wasn't ready to deal with Ranger right now.

He gave me a small smile and opened his mouth just before his phone rang again. He looked at the screen but answered it without moving. "Yo." Nodding, he listened for a few seconds then responded, "Okay, bring it all over."

The thought of someone coming over made me nervous. I wasn't sure I was up to seeing anyone and didn't really want anyone to see me in this battered state. Hector sensed my tension and put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me into his side and kissing my head.

Tank squatted down in front of me. "Ram and Woody are coming over to bring your purse. Your phone was still inside, but your credit cards and cash are gone. They're also bringing some food from Ella. If you don't want to see them, I won't let them inside."

I started wringing my hands as I thought about what he was saying. I didn't want to hurt the guys' feelings, but I wasn't sure I wanted to see them either. I knew I couldn't take a hug from them right now. I was okay with Lester, Hector, Bobby and Tank touching me, even craved Tank's reassuring embrace but the idea of any other man touching me right now seemed to be too much.

"Little Girl, it's okay. They won't hurt you, but you don't have to see them either." Tank's hands rested on top of mine.

"They can come inside, it's okay. They're my friends, I know." I let out a deep breath and stood up wanting to use the restroom before Ram and Woody arrived. Tank helped me stand and nodded.

In the bathroom, I took a long look at myself. The swelling in my face had gone down, but there was no doubt that I looked like I'd gone a few rounds with Tank. Tank's sweatshirt covered the scratches and bruises on my chest and arms. I took a deep breath before descending the stairs, in hopes that I could face Ram and Woody without breaking down.

Bobby had made me some tea, which I was sipping at the kitchen table when there was a knock at the door. The noise made me jump, I knew I was safe and that there would be company, but still my nerves were totally on edge.

Tank got up to get the door but I grabbed his wrist. I wanted him to stay close, I knew it was just more Merry Men but I felt better when Tank was near. He looked to Lester who nodded and got the door while I followed Tank into the living room. I tried to stand to his side but found myself inching behind his large body, seeking a hiding spot as much as security.

Ram and Woody came inside, took one look at me and immediately slammed on their blank faces. Woody had my purse in his hands and took a few steps toward me, causing me to gasp slightly and move even further behind Tank. I knew it was ridiculous, but couldn't control the motion.

"Darlin' what did he do to you?" Woody's eyes flashed with rage and hurt as he took in my bruises and obvious desire to hide.

I shook my head, unable to answer the question. "Thank you for finding my purse," were the only words I could find and even those made my voice crack. Tank's hand reached for mine and gave me a tiny squeeze, allowing me to at least stop myself from crying.

Hector took my purse from Woody and held it in his hand as they did the silent communication thing. I hated thinking that I wasn't being nice to them, but I just couldn't dig anything up from my depleted well to give them right now.

"Damien Robbins called RangeMan looking for Steph." Ram's jaw was tight as he made eye contact with Tank. A shiver worked through my body at that news. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised that he was looking for me, but the knowledge that he even contacted RangeMan for me ratcheted up my level of fear. I couldn't be sure if he was looking for me to assuage any guilt over his plan going wrong or to hurt me further.

I could my body start to shake as I thought about any plans Damien might have for me. Tank's thumb ran across the back of my hand returning to me the present and reminding me that I was safe with him and the rest of the Merry Men. Bobby moved closer and took a box from Ram's hands. "Who took the call and what did they tell him?" Bobby's tone was devoid of any of his usual compassion.

"Binkie took the call and he told Robbins that Steph was off today. Robbins didn't leave a message." Ram's eyes cut to me quickly and I saw a flash of sadness and rage before the blank face came back.

Bobby nodded before Lester led them to the door. They talked quietly before Ram and Woody gave me a soft smile and waved goodbye. The door closed and Tank turned, taking me in his arms as I shivered a bit. "I'm sorry, I didn't want to be cold to them, I guess I'm just not quite ready for company yet."

Tank's hands rubbed a path up and down my spine as I relaxed into him. "It's alright, Steph. I'm sure they understand."

He led me to the couch where Hector handed me my purse. "They dusted for prints, Chica."

I nodded assuming that all of RangeMan was looking for clues. I opened my purse and found my wallet empty except for my license and some customer cards. "I'll need to cancel my credit cards." The guys murmured in agreement as I pulled out my phone and began looking through my missed calls.

There were calls from my mom and Lula, but they hadn't left messages. Damien had called a dozen times since last night and left several messages. My muscles tensed up as the sight of his name caused a flood of memories to crash upon me. "Damien left some messages."

I heard a growl but wasn't sure who it came from. I started wringing my hands again. I knew I needed to listen to the messages, let the guys hear them, but wasn't sure I could take listening to his voice. The panic that had been at the edge of my brain started to invade and take over as I looked at Tank. He tucked a curl loose curl behind my ear and gave me a smile.

Holding the phone in my shaking hands, I put it on speaker and dialed voice mail. The second I heard Damien's voice a tear leaked out of my eye. Tank put his arm around me and I moved the rest of the way, situating myself onto his lap. I listened to Damien's messages and watched as each of the jaws of my friends twitched with anger.

The last message was more frantic than the previous but the words were mostly the same. "Steph, this is Damien again. I don't know what happened to you at The Bluemoon last night and I'm worried. Please call me as soon as you get this message. Please let me know you're alright."

Leaning my head onto Tank's chest, I let out a deep breath. "The Merry Men haven't found him yet, have they?"

Tank kissed my forehead but I could feel him shaking his head no. Bobby gave me a sad smile before explaining. "He's at the fire station and we'll tail him if he leaves."

I nodded understanding that they would get him the minute they could, but as usual they were exercising discretion. Les smiled and stood up, "Let's see what goodies Ella sent along." I assumed that food was in the box Ram had given Bobby.

Ella had sent along some sandwiches, chips, and fruit for lunch as well as some covered dishes for dinner that the guys stuck in the fridge. There was also a decadent looking chocolate cake, but I just didn't have any appetite, I barely ate half my sandwich despite the guys urging to keep my strength up.

An idea took hold in my brain and as much as it terrified me, I felt like it needed to be done. I wanted the guys to get with Damien, wanted them to find out what he knew and on some level wanted them to teach him a lesson. "I should go to my apartment later and call Damien." I blurted it out without preparing them for my latest scheme.

Tank's hand instantly gripped at my knee obviously not liking the idea and the shocked faces of Lester, Hector, and Bobby let me know they didn't like it either. I took in a deep breath and spoke before any of them could interrupt. "I don't want to do this, don't want to see him, but I can call him and meet him there. You guys can nab him the minute he gets behind closed doors and then I'll leave."

Lester was shaking his head. "I don't like this, Beautiful." Despite his protests, I could tell that he knew it was a workable and discrete plan.

"I don't like it either." My voice got angry and tearful at the same time. "I just want to get to some kind of resolution, please."

"Okay, Steph." Bobby's calm voice and eyes soothed me a bit. "Let us work out a plan, huh and then we'll talk about it some more."

Letting out a deep breath, I nodded, knowing that they would make sure to have every contingency covered. "Can I take a nap while you talk?" I was so tired and knew that if I was going to do this, was going to face Damien even for a few seconds that I'd need some energy.

"Of course, Little Girl." Tank stood up, pulling me up with him and leading me to his bedroom.

He helped me sit on the bed and kissed my temple. "Is there anything else you need, Steph?" His hand rested on my neck as his eyes searched mine.

I chewed on my lip, afraid of asking for what I needed, afraid that I was being too clingy. "Um, could you, uh..."

Cupping my cheeks in his hands, he gave me a small smile. "Whatever it is, I'll do it. Just tell me what you need."

"Could you lie here with me, next to me until I fall asleep? I know you want to figure out a plan but just for a bit, stay here, please." I looked down at the bed, unable to meet his eyes, afraid of rejection or awkwardness.

"Sure, Little Girl." He tilted my chin up to look at him, before lying back on the bed and opening his arms to me. I laid my head on his chest and breathed a huge sigh of relief as his arm held my body against his.

"Get some rest, Steph." He kissed the top of my head.

"If you figure out a plan for tricking Damien, you'll be beside me the whole time, won't you?" I didn't think I could handle talking to Damien, let alone seeing him without Tank next to me.

"Steph, I promise, I'll be right next to you and we won't leave you alone with him for even a second." His arm tightened around me.

I sat up and allowed my hand to caress his jaw while I looked deep into his eyes. I needed to be able to read him and let him know I needed the absolute brutal truth to my next question. "Are you going to kill Damien?"

His eyes flashed with rage and I felt his hand make a fist against my back. "I'm not sure yet. He will be hurt but I'm not sure about dead." His eyes searched mine as he talked. "Would that make you feel safe, Steph? If he was wiped from the earth, would that give you some security? I'll do anything to make you feel safe, to give you peace."

I shook my head. "I don't know if that's what I want. I don't like you all having to do something like that for me. I do want to know what he was thinking and I do want him to feel afraid, want him to understand on some level what I'm feeling, is that wrong?"

"Oh he'll feel fear and pain, believe that. I'll also get to the bottom of just what in the hell he was thinking. He'll talk or I'll make him." Tank's voice was more of a growl than I'd ever heard. "I think it's natural, not wrong that you want him to understand what he put you through. I'm going to make sure he understands, Little Girl."

"Do you think Damien has done this to other women?" I couldn't imagine someone else going through what I was at the moment and I knew I didn't want anyone else to suffer through it in the future.

"I don't know Steph. He may have set women up to be harassed but not raped. We did a background search on him and it didn't turn up anything at all, let alone something like this." His answer surprised me and he knew it. "You didn't think you could go on a date with someone without us checking him out did you?" He didn't apologize or act embarrassed and I guess on some level I did know that the Merry Men would always be protective of me.

"What about the man who raped me? Assuming you find him, I mean." I knew the guys had precious little to go on and that my rapist may never be found.

Tank's hands cupped my cheeks. "We will find that fucker and he will suffer." I saw the truth in his eyes; my rapist would suffer before dying. On some level, I felt relief about that and I knew that made me a monster of some sort, but it also made me feel some panic about what would happen to Tank.

"I don't want any of you to get in trouble. I couldn't survive it of you were taken from me in order to keep me safe."

"Don't worry about us Little Girl." He kissed my nose and guided me to his chest again. "Get some sleep."

Wrapping my arm around his side, I gave him a small squeeze. "You're my rock, you know Tank. I mean you were before this happened, but even more now. I don't want to be a burden, you'll tell me if I'm too needy won't you?"

He let out a sigh with those words, his fingers tracing the hairline on my face. "Stephanie, you are the light of my life. You are not, nor could you ever be a burden to me." I let my eyes close as the lull of his chest rising and falling beneath me gave me the security I needed to rest my weary mind and body.

Damien was watching me struggle from the front seat as my attacker held me down; his body nestled between my legs. I screamed for help, begged Damien to stop the assault, but he just watched with curiousity but did nothing to help. I screamed again and heard Tank calling for me, I knew if I could just scream louder that he'd hear me and help.

"Wake up, Steph. You're safe, it's just a nightmare." My eyes flew open as I gasped for air. Tank was kneeling on the bed next to me, his eyes concerned as his hands rubbed my arms. I threw myself into his arms, grateful to be in his bed and not back in that car.

He held me until I stopped shaking, whispering words of comfort and promises of safety. When I regained some composure, he pulled back and looked into my eyes. "Want to talk about it?"

"I was back in the car, this time Damien was watching the man attack me from the front seat." I wiped the tears from my eyes and tried to give him a smile. "How long have I been asleep?"

"A few hours." He rested his forehead on mine, his arms keeping me against his body. "I'm sorry your sleep is so tortured Steph. It'll get better with time."

I nodded and took a deep breath. "Were you able to come up with a plan for tonight? Am I going to call Damien?" I tried to force some bravery behind my words.

Tank let out a long breath through pursed lips and nodded. "Are you sure you want to do this Steph? You'll only have to talk to him for a few seconds on the phone and then through your apartment door. We'll knock him out and get you out before he wakes up."

"You'll be the the entire time, right?"

"I promise." His gaze held mine leaving no doubt that he wasn't going to leave my side

"Then I can do it. I don't want to be around when he wakes up or when you all talk to him."

"We don't want you there either, Little Girl." He gave me a smirk and I was reminded that he and the rest of the Merry Men were fierce warriors but rarely let me see their darkest sides.

"Do I have to come back here by myself after you get Damien?" I didn't think I could handle being alone at night just yet and the knowledge of my fear only seemed to make me panic more.

Tank sensed my distress and kissed my forehead. "No, one of the four of us will stay here with you at all times until you're sick of us, okay?"

I nodded. "Thank you." My whispered voice betrayed the desperation I tried to hide. "Alright, let's go get a rundown of this plan and then I'll get ready to go." I stood up from Tank's embrace and did my best to ready myself to do what needed to be done tonight.


	5. Chapter 5

_Again much thanks to Cristi0819 for fixing grammatical errors but for also offering advice and words of wisdom to make this story better - you rock my world._

_Thanks to everyone who has read, reviewed, added this story to alert lists, and sent me messages. I so appreciate your support and encouragement. _

_**Chapter 5 - Tank's POV**_

We'd come early to Steph's apartment so that she could pack some things. Ella had given us some basics, but it was obvious that Steph needed more. I hated knowing that she was being driven from her apartment, but was so glad to give her something to control at the moment and glad to know that she was packing items so that she could stay at my house and be safe. Hector had already taken her bags to the truck, not wanting anything to slow us down when it was time to leave.

Our plan for tonight involved Steph calling Damien and inviting him to her apartment. Cal and Vince would tail Robbins from the fire station and alert us when he got near. We were leaving nothing to chance and wanted to make sure Steph had no surprises. She'd been through enough and while she insisted that she wanted to do this tonight, we all worried that it was too much, too soon.

Steph was sitting on her couch shaking like a leaf. Lester was sitting on the coffee table in front of her, his knees on the outside of hers. He had his fingers curled around the back of her neck, his thumbs caressing her cheeks as his forehead rested against hers. He was talking to her quietly, whispering words of comfort and reassurance. They both had their eyes closed as their noses touched, Steph mirrored his deep breathing as she tried to calm her nerves. It was touching to watch, though I was cursing myself for thinking this was a good idea.

She took a deep breath and leaned back from Les' touch. Her fingers played with her cell phone for a second before she looked at me. I gave her a smile and sat down next to her. She moved her body up against mine and dialed Damien. The way she gravitated towards me reassured me that I did indeed make her feel safe and that any time she jumped it was as a result of this trauma not because of anything I did or didn't do. Lester and Hector sat on the coffee table in front of her, while Bobby sat on the other side of her. We were unconsciously building a fortress around her, wanting to make her feel safe and reassure ourselves at the same time that nothing would go wrong tonight.

The phone shook in her hand, but she brought it up to her ear. Her other hand laced fingers with mine. I could feel her vibrate against me as she shook and my heart was breaking. Her fear only served to reinvigorate my rage and my desire to wrap my hands around Robbins' throat.

"Damien, yeah I'm at my apartment. Why don't you come over?" Her voice was steady despite the quaking of her body. She was quiet for a few seconds, obviously listening to Damien's voice. His words were upsetting her as her breathing increased and her grip on my hand tightened. "I'll tell you the whole story when you get here."

Hanging up the phone, a few tears escaped her eyes. "He said he'd be on his way."

Hector dialed Cal and alerted him to be ready to move. We had a plan in place that would have Hector and Lester outside Steph's apartment just in case Robbins got spooked and ran before coming inside. Steph was going to stand back and tell Damien to come in when he knocked and when he opened the door I was going to stun him. Bobby was going to stay back with Steph just in case something happened and she needed extra protection. As soon as we had Damien subdued, I was getting her out of here and back to my home.

Steph stood up and started to pace around her apartment, her nervous energy needing an outlet. I knew it was too soon for this and hated that we might be traumatizing her further, but at the same time, I knew it was a good plan and that it would allow us to get information that we desperately needed.

Cal's voice came through our earpieces. "We're a block away." His voice was hard and cold and I knew without seeing him that his game face was on.

I looked at Steph who was leaning up against Bobby. "He'll be here in a minute or two. Are you okay to do this Steph? We can do it a different way." We had other plans and while it was risky to grab him in the parking lot, we could and would if she needed to stop.

She shook her head. "I can do this." I could tell that her breathing was getting more ragged as she got more nervous but she looked determined too. If this would help her heal in some way and allow me to get my hands on the man who had raped and violated her, then it would be worth it.

Hector and Lester left to take their places outside, hidden in the stairwell, while Bobby kept Steph at his side by her bedroom door. I stood next to the apartment door, my mind and body tense, ready to pounce the minute Robbins stepped through the door.

A knock at the door caused Steph to gasp and jump. Bobby wrapped his arm around her shoulder and squeezed her to his body. She let out a deep breath and shouted, "Come in."

The door opened and I lost control. I was supposed to stun him, but the sight of him broke the chain I had on my temper and I punched him. He didn't even see me coming before my fist connected with the side of his head and he fell unconscious to the floor. I went to roll him over and couldn't stop myself from hitting him again.

I pulled back to hit him again when I heard Bobby's stern voice. "Bomber, take a deep breath for me." I looked in their direction and realized that Steph was hyperventilating.

Not wanting to scare her anymore, I spoke into my mouthpiece alerting Lester and Hector to come get our prisoner. I cuffed Robbins quickly and ran to Steph. Bobby had her sitting with her head between her knees. He was rubbing her back and talking to her, trying to get her to calm down.

Lester and Hector came in and made eye contact with me as Steph got control of her breathing. Bobby looked at me, his face serious. "Get her out of her now."

I nodded and moved to Steph's side. I touched her shoulder causing her to flinch away from me violently, her nerves completely fried. "Little Girl, let me get you out of here."

She made eye contact with me, her eyes red and full of tears, and nodded. I moved towards her slowly, trying to give her time to prepare for my touch before picking her up into my arms. I carried her out to Cal and Vince's rig in the parking lot. Her hysterical cries were the worst sound I'd ever heard in my life. Vince opened the back door, his jaw clenching as I climbed into the seat with Steph on my lap.

Cal looked at me in the rear view mirror the anger obviously radiating from him. I met his gaze and barked, "Take us to my house."

As we drove, I whispered to Steph, telling her how proud I was of her and how strong she was. I let her know that we would get answers from Damien and that she would never have to see him or talk to him ever again.

At the house, Vince used his RangeMan security codes to open my door so that I could carry Steph straight in without stopping. Vince and Cal carried in her bags as I took her straight to my bedroom and closed the door. I wanted to give her the privacy she needed to get the fear and anxiety out of her system.

Keeping her body on my lap, I sat on the bed and pulled a blanket around her, wanting to warm her up. She cried for a long time, her body shivering constantly. I was at complete loss of how to ease her pain. "You did so well, Little Girl. Just relax, now."

She took in a shuddering breath, her arms wrapped around me. "I'm sorry I freaked out."

"Nothing to be sorry about, Steph. It's just adrenaline and you have every right to be afraid. We have him now and we're going to get some answers." I knew the guys were going to land some punches to Robbins, but the plan was for them to throw him into a holding cell at RangeMan for the time being. I would be the one to get answers from him.

We sat on the bed, her body curled up against mine for a long time. She didn't speak but she didn't cry either and I just did my best to be the rock she needed. I heard Lester and Bobby in the kitchen and knew that I needed to get to RangeMan and take advantage of the state they'd put Robbins in.

I caressed her cheek and kissed her forehead. I wanted to remember how fragile she felt in my arms, wanted to carry this with me, wanted it to feed my rage when I confronted Robbins. Taking in a deep breath, I let it out and whispered to her. "Little Girl, I hate to do this, but I need to go to RangeMan for a little while. Lester and Bobby are here, so you're not alone. I bet Bobby could make you something to good to eat too, you must be hungry."

She nodded. "Thank you." Her eyes were stormy as they met mine and I knew she was trying to find words that she just couldn't at the moment. "Will you hurry back?"

"Of course, Little Girl. I don't want to be away from you for any longer than necessary, but you know Lester and Bobby will keep you safe until I get back." I didn't want to leave her but at the same time I needed to talk to Robbins, needed to make him pay.

"I know. I'll wait with them until you get back." She sat up and smiled at me.

She kept the blanket around her shoulders as I helped her get downstairs. Bobby and Lester wore matching smirks, they had vented a bit of their rage and it allowed them to feel lighter. I was looking forward to feeling the same way. Steph gave me a slight smile and followed me to the door. "I'll be back as soon as I can, I promise." I kissed her nose and smiled at the slight sigh she gave at my attentions.

Hector was waiting in a rig in the driveway for me. I climbed in the passenger seat and allowed my mind to gather focus, allowed the animal inside of me that I was trying to keep hidden from Steph rise to the surface. When we arrived at RangeMan, I sprinted to the holding cell.

Throwing the door open, it banged off the wall before slamming shut behind me. Robbins stood up, his face beaten and bloody, his eyes wide and panicked. The sight of him so obviously afraid thrilled me as I stalked him. In one swift movement, I grabbed his shirt, picked him up and threw him against the wall.

I wrapped my hands around his throat and lifted him a few inches from the floor, choking him slightly but letting him have enough air to speak. "Who did you pay to hurt her?" My nose was inches from his as I spoke. I wasn't yelling but I was as close as I ever was to screaming.

He shook his head in an attempt to deny what I was asking. I slammed him against the wall again, making sure his head connected with the concrete. "Who did you pay to rape her?"

Robbins' eyes got wide at my statement. "I, I didn't. I didn't pay anyone to rape her." I believed him, sadly. He didn't mean for this to go so far, but that didn't mean I was going to let him off the hook. He should have known better, should have taken care of Stephanie.

"Still, you did pay someone to harass her. I want to know his name and what in the hell you were thinking." I dropped him, letting him fall to the floor before punching him again. "Believe me when I tell you that your night is only going to get more and more painful if you don't talk." His night was going to get more painful anyway but we would keep it short of outright torture if he volunteered the information.

He curled up on the floor, trying to protect himself from further blows. I watched him, knowing that I was smiling as I squatted in front of him waiting for him to talk. He was a wimp and I knew it wouldn't take much for him to talk.

"I didn't mean for her to get raped. James Mathis. That's who I hired. He was just supposed to give Steph a little bit of a hard time so that I could step in and be her hero. I'd hired James before and he'd never hurt of any of my other dates. I didn't know, didn't know..." His voice wandered off as he tried to cope with what he'd done. His words only served to add fuel to the fire of my rage.

"Your other dates? How many women have you done this to?" I cracked my knuckles wanting him to fear what was coming next.

"A couple, but nothing bad happened to them. I always stepped in and James never varied from our plan." He covered his head anticipating another blow from me. It only made me laugh as I landed a kick to his kidney.

"I'm going to find out who James Mathis is and if Steph confirms that he's the one who hurt her, you might just live to see another day." I came unhinged for a few moments, venting all the rage I'd been holding inside for the last two days. He passed out and I sat back on my heels, taking a cleansing breath before standing up and walking out of the room, allowing the door to slam behind me.

Binkie and Hector were standing outside. I looked at them both and ran my hand over my head. "Anyone who wants a turn can have it, but he needs to stay alive, for now." I knew the guys didn't have all the details, but every soldier inside this building knew that Robbins had hurt Steph in some way and they would all want to avenge that on some level.

Hector and I made our way back to the garage as I put in a call to Rodriguez. I wanted him to find every James Mathis in Trenton so that I could give Steph some photos to look at. I knew Rodriguez would do a thorough job and having that name gave me more hope than I'd had since Steph showed up on my doorstep at making sure I could erase her rapist from the earth.

Steph was asleep on the couch, my cat Edgar curled up against her hip, when Hector and I got back to my house. Looking at her sleeping, bruised face gave me peace and enraged me at the same time. I knew the guys inside RangeMan would make Robbins' night a living nightmare, but I had the urge to run back and hurt him more myself, but the desire to stay close to my Little Girl overpowered that urge for revenge.

Bobby nodded his head and I followed him into the kitchen. "I gave her a pain killer, a little stronger than before, so it should help her sleep a little deeper, too. She needs to get some good sleep in order to heal. I watched her walking and know she's in more pain than she's letting on." He frowned at his words, but we all knew Steph wasn't a complainer by nature and always tried to put on a brave face.

"Okay, anything else I need to know or do for her medically?" I knew she was hiding her pain too, knew that she was trying not to let us see how literally torn she was from the assault.

Bobby shook his head. "I'll be back in the morning; there are some more pain pills in your bathroom. She can have two more in two hours, then two more every four hours after that if she wants them. Call me if she needs anything."

I watched as Hector and Lester kissed Steph's sleeping cheek. Each of them trying to breathe in the softness she normally exuded. Bobby did the same thing before I walked them to the door.

Locking the door behind them, I set my security system and went back to look at Steph's sleeping body. Gently, I slipped my arms under her, figuring she'd be more comfortable in bed. I climbed a few steps, when she sighed into my chest. "Tank?"

She didn't open her eyes so I wasn't completely sure she was awake. "Yes, it's me, Little Girl."

"I'm so glad you're home." I couldn't help but squeeze her more tightly, her words touching my soul so very deeply. Her arm wrapped around my neck rather lazily as I carried her the rest of the way to my bedroom. I pulled down the covers of my bed and got her situated underneath before kissing her forehead. "Stay with me, please Tank. Stay." Her voice was so small and tired, renewing my vow to make her feel safe and whole again.

I brushed her wild hair from her face and whispered into her ear, "I'm going to shower and change Steph, then I'll be back to lay down with you."

She nodded and again I wasn't sure she was completely awake, but knew that she did better when I was close to her. Earlier today she slept soundly while I held her, the nightmares only returning when she was alone. I hurried through my shower, washing Robbins' blood from my hands and changing into a tank top and shorts before crawling into bed.

Lying on my side, my front pressed up against her back, my arm encircled her waist and pulled her tight against me. I kissed her head and made silent promises to her as I watched her sleep. I loved this woman before all this happened, but my love was more fierce now and while I knew the timing was off, I was going to do everything I could to prove my love to her as she healed. I wouldn't push her or make her feel uncomfortable I would just slowly show her how I felt so that she never had to be afraid again.


	6. Chapter 6

_Continued thanks to my fantastic beta: Cristi0819._

_**Chapter 6 - Steph's POV**_

Tank's warm, large body was pressed up against mine as I woke, his arm securely wrapped around my waist. My body ached as I stretched and came awake. The pain pills Bobby had given me had knocked me out and left me still groggy, but at least the night had been free from haunting nightmares.

I groaned as I stretched, the pain in my lower abdomen sending a sharp pain up through my body. Tank was awake instantly, propping his body up on his elbow, his other hand brushing the hair from my face. "Steph? What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry I woke you. I'm just tender." I didn't think he needed to know exactly where I was tender. I was trying hard not to talk about being raped with the guys much, the details of that were hard to share, difficult to think about for me and it seemed like it would be even harder for them to hear so I tried to spare them of that. I knew just regular mishaps with skips were hard for them to take, let alone the knowledge that someone had forced himself inside me.

He gave me a small smile, his fingers tracing the edges of a bruise on my face. "Do you want some pain pills?"

I shook my head. "Maybe just some ibuprofen. I don't like feeling so groggy." I rolled onto my back to look up at him better, trying to hide my wince, but his expression let me know I didn't do a very good job of it.

His fingertips grazed my skin. "I'll get it for you."

Shaking my head, I grasped at his wrist. "I need to use the bathroom, I'll get it. Maybe then we can have coffee and you can tell me what happened with Damien."

Tank's eyes flashed with anger then compassion as he nodded his head. He kissed my forehead and stood. He helped me stand and supported my tender body down the hall to the bathroom. At the door, he gave me a small smile before turning to leave me alone.

"Tank," He stopped his movement and turned back to me. I put my hand on his strong chest, letting it rest over his heart. Putting his hand over mine, he gave it a gentle squeeze. "Thank you. I know it's not enough and I feel so much more than that, but I can't find the words. I appreciate everything. I appreciate you."

He leaned forward slowly, keeping my hand trapped against his chest and kissed my cheek. "Anything for you, Little Girl. You don't have to thank me, there's nothing I won't do for you." He tugged on one of my curls and squeezed my hand again. "I'll get the coffee ready."

In the bathroom, I stood in front of the mirror for a long time looking at my bruises and tracing them with my fingers. The swelling had receded, but I was still mostly black and blue and the hand prints on my arms were more pronounced. I wished that I could wash the bruises off, get rid of the physical reminders of what had been done, what had been taken from me. I knew the mental reminders would be with me for a while, but I was hoping I could work on those too.

Tank's support and tenderness were helping me tremendously. I knew at some point I was going to have to leave his secure embrace and the safety of his home, but right now I couldn't envision it. The mere idea of trying to do something on my own terrified me so much that I thought I might just shake myself into dust.

He had been my best friend for a while before this happened and honestly, I'd been crushing on him for a while. I always felt that Tank only looked at me like a little sister before and now, well I felt completely destroyed. He deserved someone who was whole and I couldn't even begin to think of trying to build a relationship with a man when I was so very tainted.

I shook my head and wiped the corner of my eyes. "One day at a time Stephanie." I tried to give myself a little pep talk before heading downstairs.

In the kitchen, Tank was on the phone already as he dug coffee cups out of the cupboard. He heard me approach and turned, giving me a smile. He hung up and pulled out a chair for me. "Bobby's coming by with some Tasty Pastry and he wants to just check on you a bit."

He handed me a cup of coffee and sat down next to me with his own cup. I looked at his eyes and back down at my coffee. "I'm keeping you all from doing your work, aren't I?"

"No." He hooked his finger under my chin and tilted it up to meet his eyes. "This is our work. Even if it wasn't, you are more important than anything else we have to do."

I tried to accept what he was saying but found it difficult. I let out a deep breath and took a sip of my coffee. After swallowing, I met his eyes again. "So, tell me, what did Damien have to say?"

Tank's jaw clinched as he reined in some of his emotions. He hadn't been hiding behind his blank face much, but I could tell it was a struggle sometimes for him not to pull it on. "Robbins did set you up, but he didn't expect it to go as far it did. He'd hired the same man to harass some other women, so that he could step in and play the hero. We got a name and are hunting for him, as soon as we have photos, I'll show you." His eyes searched mine as he tried to gauge my emotions.

The tears that had been threatening to fall escaped in a steady stream at the news. "No other women were raped in this scheme? Only me?" I sniffed back the tears while watching Tank's face.

He grimaced before taking my shaking hand in his firm grasp. "Only you, Stephanie. I'm sorry."

Standing up quickly I ripped my hand from his. "Why me? What did I do to make them change their plan? Did I lead him on, tease him into raping me?" I was panicking at the news. I should have been glad that no other women were having to endure this but all I could think about was that I'd done something to deserve this.

I was pacing and chewing on my nails as Tank moved and stood in front of me. "Little Girl, none of this is your fault. You were a victim here and I won't let you blame yourself for this. They did this to you. You did nothing to deserve this, nothing!"

"But you said it yourself. I'm the only one who was raped. It must have been something I did to make it go this far." I was shaking, my voice high, as the hysteria took hold.

Tank reached out for me and pulled me to him. His arms held me tightly against his chest. "Stephanie, the man cracked. He was already on edge and Robbins' scheme pushed him over. It's not your fault. You did nothing to deserve this." I wanted to believe what he was saying but all I could think was that I had screwed up again. I had trusted Damien, and as usual, my judgment was off and it led me into danger.

My body shook as I wailed, my mouth open against Tank's chest. When my knees buckled, his strong arms caught me and picked me up to him. He shhed me as he carried me to the couch. Sitting down he situated me on his lap. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I wept into his shoulder. I hated breaking down like this, but I couldn't stop myself.

Tank whispered in my ear, promising me that it would get easier and that he would make my rapist pay. His hands ran a path up and down my back, exerting just enough pressure to pass on some security without making me feel trapped or pinned. I calmed down taking in slow, shuddering breaths as Tank placed gentle kisses on my temple.

A knock at the door made me yelp and jump back. Tank caught me before I fell off his lap onto the floor. "It's okay Steph. It's probably Bobby and even if it's not, I'm not going to let anyone hurt you."

I nodded and took in a few deep breaths trying to get a grip on my emotions and fear. Tank brushed the hair back from my face watching me, I could tell he waiting to make sure I was okay before answering the door. Moving off Tank's lap, I sat on the couch and watched as he moved towards the door. He picked a gun up off a high shelf on his way. I'd never noticed the gun there before, but I wasn't surprised that he had weapons everywhere. He looked out the peephole before tucking the gun into the waist band of his pants. "It's Bobby." His voice was soft as he threw open the locks and let in our favorite medic.

Bobby entered with a box of donuts in his hand. He was smiling, but he took one look at me and frowned. I'm sure my face and eyes were red and puffy from my tears. He gave me a sad smile and lifted up the box. "I got Boston Cremes."

"Thank you, Bobby." I laughed a bit at his obvious attempt to cheer me up.

We sat at the kitchen table, eating donuts and drinking coffee for a while. The guys were making light chit-chat, something that they were obviously forcing. They weren't known for small-talk, but I knew they were trying to make me feel better.

After I finished my second donut, Bobby handed me my antibiotics. "Do you need anything for pain, Steph?"

"I took some Ibuprofen. I'm fine, thanks." I swallowed my pills as Bobby watched and smiled. "Any word on my blood test results?" I hadn't heard from Dr. Gordon and I wasn't completely sure if she would tell me or Bobby first.

The question obviously caught Bobby off-guard, his face registering shock then concern. He took a chair next to me and looked at me seriously. "Not yet, but it takes a few days, most likely today, tomorrow at the latest. Are you feeling okay? Anything I should know or do you want to visit your doctor?" His hand reached out to feel my forehead for fever.

"Just wanting to know is all. You know patience has never been my strong suit." I tried to laugh. Having the results of that blood test, knowing whether or not I was going to be sick from this rape seemed to be vitally important. I needed to know just how long I was going to have to be reminded of him inside me and just how thoroughly he had ruined me.

Bobby put his hand over mine. "Bomber, the antibiotics Susan gave you are very strong. They're a precaution, but should take care of anything you might have been given. If not, we'll cross that bridge when we know what we're dealing with, but you shouldn't worry."

Again, I wanted to believe his words but my mind raced with doubts. "Can I take a shower?" I looked away from Bobby and at Tank.

"You don't have to ask Steph. Do whatever you need." Tank smiled as he refilled his coffee cup, but I could tell that my morning breakdown and fears were hard on him.

After my very long, hot shower, I rummaged through my bags and found some clean jeans and a t-shirt to lounge in. I had my own sweatshirts, but ended up slipping one of Tank's on instead. Something about his clothing made me feel better and he didn't seem to mind.

When I came back downstairs, Bobby and Tank were still at the kitchen table talking. Their voices were low, but there was an intensity to their conversation that led me to believe something important had happened while I was upstairs.

Tank chuckled when I approached. "That shirt is huge on you Steph, but it looks better on you than it ever did on me." My cheeks flushed at his compliment. I knew just how awful I looked, but the fact that he could find anything at all endearing to say to me right now warmed my heart.

I refilled my coffee cup and sat down between them at the table. Tank let out a deep breath and rubbed my forearm just slightly. "Robbins told us the man who attacked you was named James Mathis. Rodriguez has found three James Mathis' in Trenton. Hector and Lester are coming over with photos for you to look at. Are you up to that?"

A shiver worked its way through my body at the news. I wasn't sure I was up to it, but I knew it was necessary, knew I needed some resolution as much as the guys wanted justice. I nodded. "What if I don't recognize him? What if I can't remember?" It had been dark when I was attacked and I had been drinking. I was terrified I wouldn't recognize the man who raped me for sure.

"If you aren't sure, that's fine Steph. There is no pressure. We'll figure it out a different way." Tank's hand wrapped around mine. "We'll show the photos around at The Bluemoon and see if someone else can say which man was there. I'll ask Robbins too, but want to make sure he tells me the truth." His voice was deep and gravely betraying the calm he was trying to exude.

Letting out a breath through pursed lips I nodded at him. I picked at a donut not really eating it while I tried to calm my mind and get a grip on my racing thoughts. When Tank's phone pulled him away from the table, I looked at Bobby, needing his advice but unsure of how to ask for it.

He noticed my questioning eyes and smiled. "What is it, honey?"

"Should I talk to a counselor, Bobby?" I wasn't sure if it would help or just keep dredging up stuff I'd rather forget, but I still wanted to get a better handle on my runaway emotions.

He gave me a smile, his fingers wrapping gently around my wrist. "I think it's a good idea, but I wasn't going to push until you were ready. I can do some research and find a few for you that would pass RangeMan vetting and you could choose from that list."

I felt tears well up again, their care for me always overwhelmed me. "Okay, thanks."

"Steph, everything you're feeling and going through is to be expected after such a trauma. We're all here for you; don't be afraid to tell us what you need. It's a healing process and we aren't going to leave you to do it on your own." Bobby's hand ran over my head before cupping my neck. "We love you."

His words made the tears well up again. "I love you all too." I didn't feel normal, I felt completely out of control but knew that he had a lot of experience with trauma and tried to hold onto his words and believe that I would indeed heal.

Hector and Lester arrived a little while later. Lester had a file folder in his hand as he pulled me into the living room with him. I sat on the couch between he and Hector, Tank stood behind the couch, his hand resting on my shoulder as Bobby sat on the floor in front of me. Their kindness and efforts to make me feel secure were so very sweet and I hoped that I didn't let them down.

Lester handed me the folder. "There were three James Mathis' in Trenton. We pulled photos from their driver's licenses for you. Take your time, Beautiful, there's no rush."

Tank's hand gave my shoulder a little squeeze and I opened the folder. I spread all three photos out on my knees and easily identified the man who attacked me. I gasped and covered my mouth to control the sob that wanted to break loose.

Hector's hand rubbed my back. "Just point Chica and we'll take care of the rest."

I pointed to the man on the left. I remembered his dark hair and dimpled chin more than anything else. Closing my eyes I saw him on top of me again, could feel his body pressing into me and I got sick. I ran for the bathroom, just barely making it to the toilet before the donuts revolted and left my body.

Bobby was on my heels, his hand pulling my hair back from my face and telling me to just relax. When I finished, I sat back on my heels and wiped the hot tears from my cheeks and looked at Bobby. "I'm sorry."

"Shh, Bomber. Nothing to be sorry about. Are you okay now?" He stood up and rinsed out a wash cloth before wiping it across my face and neck, the coolness giving me some relief.

"I think so. Will you be able to find him now?"

"You better believe it." Tank's angry voice answered from the doorway. His eyes were sad as he looked at me but his aura was ferocious.

Bobby helped me stand and I rinsed out my mouth before meeting them all back downstairs again. Lester pulled me into his side, placing a small kiss into my hair. "We're going to end this Steph."

Hector leaned in and kissed my forehead before stepping closer and putting his arms around both Lester and I. "That's a promise, Chica."

I could hear Tank on the phone and assumed it was with someone at RangeMan. I didn't need to know or want the details; I had faith in their ability and desire to take care of this. Hector, Lester and I sat back on the couch, their hands holding onto each other, but sitting in my lap. It was touching and intimate without being awkward. I knew that they were supporting each other as they supported me and again, despite everything that had happened in the last few days I felt gratitude for such wonderful friends.


	7. Chapter 7

_Continued thanks to my amazing beta, Cristi0819. She makes me and my writing look so much better than it is truly._

_**Chapter 7 - Tank's POV**_

"I want his apartment and work under surveillance until he is spotted. His cars need trackers and the minute someone gets a chance, pick him up and throw him into a holding cell. He's responsible for hurting our Bombshell. Anyone who wants a turn can have at him, but he needs to stay alive and I want him conscious when I get there." I hung up with Hal and nearly hurtled my phone across the room.

I knew our teams would find Mathis and do it discretely, but I couldn't wait to get my hands around his neck. Rubbing my hand over my face and head, I covered my mouth trying to hide the smirk at the thought of making him scream. Mathis was going to suffer for a while and I would make sure he was completely broken for what he'd done to my Little Girl. Steph's agony and insecurities from this morning would stay with me for some time to come and I would make sure to pull that memory up when I had her attacker in front of me.

Steph was on the couch with Hector and Lester, both of them making her smile and laugh a little which eased a bit of the hole in my heart. Just knowing that she could laugh and that our friends could still comfort her, that her light wasn't completely extinguished gave me some hope.

Hector gave me a small nod and moved into the kitchen while Lester kept Steph distracted. "What do you want to do with Robbins? I can take care of it." Hector's voice was low and hard, his eyes chillingly cold. This side of Hector hadn't made an appearance very often in the few months that he had been dating Lester, and he never showed it when Stephanie was around. He took his role as her guardian angel seriously and he never let her see his most dangerous persona.

"I need him for a little while longer." I met Hector's eyes and knew that neither one of us would have any qualms about killing Robbins, but still I needed him for information and I wasn't sure about killing him. It wasn't that I'd regret the action, if anything I'd be glad to do it, but I didn't think we could do it cleanly. There might be some suspicion over his disappearance since he had publically dated Steph and everyone in Trenton knew of her connection to RangeMan. "I haven't decided totally what to do with him yet. I'll let you know."

He nodded and was about to say something when Steph appeared behind him. His face changed instantly, softening so quickly I almost didn't believe it. Steph was wringing her hands and chewing on her lip as she looked at me. Lester was standing behind her, his hand on the small of her back.

"What is it Steph?" The look of uncertainty on her face threatened to tear me apart.

"I don't think I've fed Rex or given him any water." She looked like she might cry at the thought of neglecting her little pet.

I shook my head. "You fed him and gave him clean water before we went to your apartment yesterday, Little Girl. I'm sure the little guy is fine."

She continued to wring her hands, her eyes flickering between me, Hector, and Lester. Bobby was standing back watching, but she didn't see him. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure." I nodded and tried to give her a smile, but she was so nervous and anxious that I knew I wasn't getting through to her.

Lester touched her shoulder and she turned to look at him. Her face looking for answers that I felt at a complete loss to give. "Beautiful, why don't you take a carrot up to Rex as a little treat?"

Her face relaxed at Lester's suggestion, then she looked at me smiling just a bit though her hands were still wringing against her stomach. "Is that okay? Can I have a carrot?"

It wasn't like Steph to ask for permission or seek approval and it ate at my gut a little to see it in her now. "Of course, Steph. You never have to ask. Help yourself to anything in this house, anytime." I moved to the fridge and pulled a carrot from the crisper. She gave me a huge smile as I handed it to her and while I loved seeing her smile, I hated the vulnerability she was exuding.

"Thanks." She sighed and took it from my hand. I watched her walk off; her gait was still tentative, giving me a more honest picture of how sore she truly was.

Bobby frowned from the edge of the room and approached us as Steph went upstairs. "It's a normal traumatic response, she can't make decisions. We just need to be patient with her. When she asks for permission it's because she can't make a decision, so we just need to help her by giving it to her."

Lester nodded. "I did a little reading last night, too."

"A little, only all night long." Hector chuckled.

Lester shrugged his shoulders and looked at Bobby. "I did some reading on rape trauma syndrome. She seems to be fitting into the stuff I read, difficulty concentrating and in making decisions, not to mention the bewilderment and tremors." He curled his fingers into fists. "I hate seeing her shake so much."

"She's the strongest person I've ever known, I hate seeing her so unsure." I let out a deep breath. "Mathis is going to pay very painfully for this." My sentence was more of a growl than well-formed words, but it was answered by three other growls and I knew that we were all on the same page about the end of one James Mathis.

Bobby stretched his neck to the side, trying to relieve some of his tension. "She asked me about counseling." I raised my eyebrow, surprised but pleasantly so, wanting her to get any help she needed to recover. "I'm compiling a list for her of RangeMan approved counselors."

"Women, right?" I knew RangeMan had a list of great male counselors trained in dealing with combat PTSD but the idea of sending Steph into a room with a man alone was something I couldn't handle. Bobby wouldn't send her to someone who wasn't cleared by RangeMan background checks, of course, but still I didn't want to leave anything to chance.

"Yes." He chuckled. "I'm unwilling to leave her alone with a man either, plus it'll probably be easier for her to talk about it with another woman."

"I want to have another chat with Robbins this morning. Who can stay with her?" I didn't want to leave her but at the same time I needed to have this chat with Robbins on my own.

"We will." Hector spoke up as he tugged on Lester's hand. It was obvious that the two of them wanted some alone time with their friend and adopted little sister and I knew that if anyone could make her laugh, they could.

She still hadn't come back downstairs and I was starting to worry about her. I knew she was safe here, but she hadn't been very far from me for very long in the last few days. I needed to change and strap on my holsters before leaving and all of that was in my bedroom.

When she didn't respond to my quiet knocks, I opened the bedroom door and found her sitting in my armchair. She was looking out the window, her legs curled up to her chest. "Steph, are you okay?"

My voice startled her, causing her entire body to flinch. She wiped the tears from her cheeks and let out a deep breath as her eyes met mine. "I feel a little like I'm going crazy. I can't think straight and I can't remember simple things, like feeding Rex."

I sat on the stool in front of her, my hands reaching for hers. "Those pain pills just made you groggy Steph and as for going crazy, you're not. You've had quite a trauma, Little Girl. Your mind is just trying to cope."

She bit her lip and moved closer to me, her hands gripping mine tightly. "I can still feel his hands on me, I smell him sometimes. I've tried washing the smell off, but it just won't go away. I turn the water as hot as it will go and I scrub so hard, but I still smell him. I just want to forget that he ever touched me. I can't make his touch or smell go away."

Her words were breaking my heart, but I wanted her to feel free to talk to me. I didn't want her to censor her thoughts or emotions. "Oh God, Little Girl, I wish I could take that from you, wish I could suffer it so you didn't have to. I'm so sorry I couldn't protect you from this." I'd been beaten, tortured before but even in my wildest nightmares I couldn't imagine the violation she was enduring. Mathis' final days would be agonizing and I would erase him so that she could feel safe, but her tears and words now let me know that it wouldn't be enough, that she would always carry a bit of what he had done with her. I would give her whatever she needed to feel safe and secure but I was at a complete loss at how to help her ease her suffering.

Trying to calm my rage before it seeped out in front of her, I took a deep breath and looked down at our joined hands. Her sleeves had ridden up a bit and I could see the hand print bruises on her pale skin, the sight of those enraged me further making it even more difficult to stay calm. She let go of my hand and threw her arms around my neck, pressing her torso against mine.

Wrapping my arms around her waist I pulled her onto my lap. She wrapped her legs around my waist and held onto me for dear life, hiding her face in the crook of my neck. I rubbed her back and kissed her cheek trying to provide something, anything to make her feel less fragile.

After a few minutes, she loosened her grip and placed a quick peck on my ear lobe. "Thanks."

Smiling, I let my hand cup her cheek, my thumb lightly caressing her skin. "Anything for you."

She smiled and moved from my embrace, sat on the chair and looked at me. "What's the plan for the day?" Her ability to pull strength from deep inside never ceased to amaze me. I knew it was forced and while I didn't want her to pretend to be okay on my account, I also understood the need for a little normalcy too.

"I need to go to RangeMan for a bit. Lester and Hector are going to stay here with you, ok?"

"Ok. Will you be long?" I watched as her hands began pulling on each other, her nervousness expressing itself with small tremors and hand wringing.

Placing my hands over hers, I held her gaze wanting her to feel assured. "I'll be as fast as I can." She nodded as I moved to get some clothes. "I'm going to change in the bathroom then come back here and get my holsters and guns. Do you want to wait here or go downstairs?"

As I gathered my cargos and t-shirt, I watched her from the corner of my eye. She was struggling with what to do. "Um, can I wait for you?" I'd already told her she could, but it was obvious that Lester and Bobby were right. She was having trouble making decisions.

"Of course, Steph. I'm going to shave and change and then I'll be back. Just relax there for a few minutes." I hurried through my shave routine, wanting to get moving and back here as soon as I could.

Steph watched me closely as I put my weapons on. Her eyes fluctuating back and forth between the weapon and my face. I couldn't read what was going on in her mind, despite the usual transparency she carried. I didn't push for her thoughts either, figuring she would share if and when she was ready. When I was done, I held my hand out to her. "Ready?"

She smiled and nodded, taking my hand in hers. I kissed her forehead one last time, leaving her in Hector and Lester's capable care as Bobby and I headed to RangeMan.

On the drive over, Bobby filled me in a bit on Robbins' night. Bobby had checked him out in the morning. No serious injuries, but the guys had worked him over pretty good. The thought of it made me chuckle. By now Robbins' was probably a quivering mess in the holding cell, terrified of every sound and wondering when the next beating would come. I was glad for it because I knew Steph was feeling worse than that and I wanted him to understand what true vulnerability felt like.

Entering the holding cell, I saw Robbins curled up in a corner. His face was swollen and bruised and his eyes were absolutely frightened when he saw me approach. Squatting down in front of him, I smirked as he looked at the floor. "You need to answer a few more questions and then I might just let you out of here today." He nodded quickly, his eyes glancing up at me, waiting to hear what I had to say.

"Did you call Mathis after Steph disappeared at The BlueMoon?" I was working extra hard at controlling my temper. I wanted to beat him to a bloody pulp, but I needed this information.

"I tried, but he never answered." Robbins' voice was quiet and weak as he answered.

"Does Mathis know Steph is associated with RangeMan in anyway? Does he know who we are?" I needed to know if Mathis was going to be watching his back or if we were going to be able to surprise him.

"Not from me. I never mentioned it. We had run this little ruse before. We didn't talk about the details, he just saw me with the girl and did his part."

His words enraged me and I reached out to grab his throat, squeezing tightly as his hand tried to tug mine off him. "This is not a little ruse, you dumb fuck. You allowed Stephanie to be raped. I could rip your throat out right now and no one would ever find your body."

I released my grip and stretched my neck, rolling my shoulders as I tried to get some control. "I'm going to let you live, for now. If you tell anyone about this, I'll kill you without a second thought." He nodded his agreement. "If you try to contact Stephanie in anyway, I'll kill you. If you come near her even by accident, it will be your last breath. Do you understand?"

"Yes." He answered, his breath ragged but his eyes hopeful.

"RangeMan will be keeping a very close eye on you. We won't let you do this to any other women either, got it? If you leave town, we'll keep tabs on you. We will be over your shoulder for the rest of your days, understand?" I would make sure that we kept trackers on him and that he knew he was being followed for a very long time. He would never be off my radar.

Letting him live was a tricky decision. It could backfire, but at the same time killing a fire fighter wouldn't likely be skimmed over as easily as some other lowlife. I'd hoped our beating would leave an indelible mark on his mind and keep him in line.

I left him curled up on the floor and Bobby went in to clean up. Upstairs I called Ram and Woody into my office. "Bobby is cleaning up Robbins. When he's done, I want Robbins' taken home and dropped off discretely. Trackers need to be placed on all his vehicles and bugs planted. I want surveillance on him constantly for a while."

They both nodded and smirked a little. Ram took a step forward and ran his hand across the back of his neck before looking me in the eye. He asked, "How bad was she hurt?" The pain in his eyes was obvious. Steph was well loved by every man in this building and I knew that not having all the details was slowly killing them.

I met his eyes, unsure of what to say. I didn't want to lie to him, but I didn't want to talk about exactly what had been done to her either. The story was Steph's to share, not mine.

Ram nodded, seeming to understand and said, "So bad, you don't know what to say and can't hide it completely from your face. This Mathis we're looking for, he's more responsible than Robbins?"

"Yeah, he caused the bruises you saw." None of the guys were dumb; I knew they'd figure it out eventually.

Woody's hands were clenching and stretching as he too figured out the full weight of what had been done to Steph. "We'll find him."

I couldn't help but chuckle, realizing that he was stating the obvious as well as his intention to make Mathis pay. "Of that I have no doubt."

After they left, I took some time to review the file Rodriguez had pulled on the man who had attacked Stephanie. James Mathis had been arrested twice before for battery, but there was no history of sexual assault, at least none had been reported. He was six inches taller and at least 80 pounds heavier than she was; she barely stood a chance against him sober without her stun gun, let alone being tipsy. Those thoughts had me changing my mind about letting Robbins go free. He'd let her get in a position where she couldn't defend herself.

Closing the file, I walked downstairs to the gym. I needed to run off some of the energy and anger I was feeling. Beating on Robbins had helped a little, but so much of it was stored in my muscles that it actually made my body ache. Running on the treadmill, my mind kept racing with images of Stephanie.

Sprinting rather than jogging the usual five miles, I was completely spent physically by the end because of the speed and intensity. Grabbing some water, I relaxed on a bench, a towel draped over my head as I tried to calm my racing heart beat and mind. While I was determined to help Stephanie reclaim her life, I was equally determined to hear Mathis scream in agony for making that reclamation necessary. As she reclaimed her life, I was resolved to prove to her that I wanted to be the man who would love and protect her for the rest of her days.


	8. Chapter 8

_I can't possibly thank my beta, Crist0819 enough. Her words of encouragement and editing are a constant blessing._

_**Chapter 8 - Steph's POV**_

I knew that I was wringing my hands and chewing on my lip but I couldn't keep the nervousness from bubbling out of me. Seeing the photo of my attacker and knowing his name did on some level comfort me, because I knew it meant that the Merry Men would be on top of it, but at the same time it frightened me more, brought a fresh wave of horrifying memories to the surface.

"Beautiful?" Lester's gaze held my eyes as he approached slowly. The guys were being so gentle and cautious with me. Despite the fact that I knew none of them would hurt me, I was still so very jumpy. "Anything you want to do?"

"I need to cancel my credit cards." I'd let it go too long, but attempting to do it yesterday was something I just couldn't face. We'd picked up account numbers and contact info when we'd gone to my apartment yesterday.

Lester gave me a smile and reached for my hand. "Let's tackle it together." I took his hand and let him lead me into the kitchen.

The three of us sat at the kitchen table as Hector helped me spread out the paperwork. I got flustered half-way through the first call, just unsure of how to answer and what to do. Where should they mail the replacement cards? I couldn't think of living back at my apartment aone right now. Lester suggested I put the phone on speaker and he helped me answer questions. It seemed ridiculous but even the simplest of decisions was impossible for me to make. Lester helped me realize that I needed to keep my address for now and that we could pick up mail until I was ready to decide where else to live.

Hector's phone rang just as I finished the last of the calls. I watched him step away and wondered if I'd ever feel normal again.

Lester's hand rubbed mine. "You'll be normal again, Steph, you just need some time." Apparently the trauma didn't decrease my ability to think out loud.

"Chica?" Hector looked at me, his phone against his shoulder. "Cal and Brett have offered to bring you lunch from Pino's. Is it okay with you if they come and eat with us?"

The idea of having company seemed overwhelming but at the same time I needed something a little normal. I nodded and Hector gave me a big smile, before letting them know to come over and bring me a meatball sub. When he hung up, he ran his hand over my head and kissed my temple. "It'll be okay, fun even."

"I know. I know they won't hurt me and that you two wouldn't let anyone hurt me either. I'm just nervous. I'm trying though, I promise." I wanted them to know that I wouldn't give up or crumble, that I would bounce back in some way.

"Beautiful, take your time. We're not rushing you and we're so very proud of you." Lester smiled and kissed my forehead as I nodded.

Excusing myself to the bathroom, I took some time to clean up and give myself a pep talk. I still felt so dirty and even though I knew I was clean, practically sanitized from the showers, soap, and hot water, still I couldn't shake the feeling of filth or my attacker's smell. I washed my hands again and told myself that I was fine, that no one else thought of me the way I did right now.

Hector and Lester were in the kitchen, standing in front of one another, their hands resting on the other's hips. They were talking low, their faces close together. Despite the energy of anger that they had been carrying, their mouths and eyes were relaxed, crinkling up into smiles as they looked into each other's eyes. It was a surprisingly light and yet deeply intimate moment and I couldn't help but sigh and smile at their love for one another.

"What was that sigh for?" Lester's voice broke me from my thoughts.

I chuckled. "I just like seeing you two so very happy." They opened their arms to me and I stepped into their embrace, the three of us hugging. It felt safe and warm, everything I needed at the moment.

A knock at the door interrupted the peace. Lester went to answer it and I found myself clinging tightly to Hector. I knew it was our friends, but I still felt horribly nervous.

Hector squeezed me tighter to him and whispered in my ear. "Steph, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. If they want a hug and you don't, just stick close to me and don't worry about it. No one is going to force you to do anything you don't want to do in this house, okay?"

I relaxed my shoulders at his words. Cal and Brett were so sweet and I knew that they would most likely want a hug, but I wasn't sure I could give it today. Most of the Merry Men saw Hector as the loosest of the loose cannons inside RangeMan, so I knew they'd stay away if I stuck close to him. I never saw him that way. If anything, Hector was one of the sweetest Merry Men. He just covered it up well.

We had a relaxed and fun lunch. My appetite was still off, but I did manage to eat half my sub. The guys made me laugh until my side hurt and for just a little while I was able to stuff down all those icky feelings with which I'd been struggling.

Cal and Brett finished and stood up to leave, Hector, Lester, and I walking them to the door. Cal took a step towards me no doubt for a hug before he left, the motion made me gasp and step behind Hector. Hector just shook his head causing Cal to look at me, hurt then anger flashing across his face before the blank look slammed down. The knowledge that I'd hurt him in some way made a lump form in my throat.

Hector pulled me to his chest when Lester walked them out to their SUV. His hands rubbed soothing circles around my back as tears welled up in my eyes. "I didn't mean to hurt Cal or make him angry."

"You didn't, Steph. He's upset about what happened to you, but he's not angry at you. He just doesn't like to see you afraid that's all." Taking my hand, he led me to the couch.

"How does he know what happened?" I wasn't sure that I wanted all of the Merry Men to know the details. The bruises they could obviously see, but I wanted them to think it was just some kind of beating, not a rape.

"Beautiful, we've all had lots of training at RangeMan." Lester said as he came back into the living room. "No one has specifically mentioned any details, but you know we all have good instincts, the guys will make inferences, they won't share them but most are guessing correctly about what you've been through."

A few tears slid down my cheek at that news. I should've known the guys would figure out but I found myself embarrassed rather than comforted that they knew the truth. "Do I have to talk about it with them?"

"No, Chica." Hector's voice was soft as he answered me.

Lester shook his head and sat down next to me. "If and when you're ready, you can share whatever you want to share. No one will push, Beautiful, I promise."

I nodded and yawned at the same time. My body was as exhausted as my mind. "I need a nap. Can I just stretch out here?" Hector and Lester moved, helping me lay down on Tank's immense couch. They threw a blanket over me and set about answering some texts and emails on their phones as I drifted off to sleep.

The sound of three phones buzzing and ringing woke me from my nap. I looked around to see that Bobby had returned. He, Hector, and Lester were looking at the screens of their phones, theirs jaws clenched and bodies rigid. I knew without asking that James Mathis had at least been spotted, if not picked up by the Merry Men.

Groaning a bit as I sat up, the three of them spun around to look at me. Bobby was squatting in front of me instantly. "Do you need something for the pain?"

"Yes, but something light, Ibuprofen maybe, nothing to make me loopy." I felt so out of control as it was that the added grogginess from pain pills only served to increase my hysteria, not calm it down.

Bobby exited to get me something as Hector and Lester approached. "We need to run out Beautiful." Lester smiled at me. "Bobby is going to stay here with you."

Sucking my bottom lip into my mouth I began chewing on it nervously. "Tank?" My dependence on Tank had grown by leaps and bounds these last few days and while I appreciated Bobby, Lester, and Hector tremendously, I was missing Tank.

Hector smiled and leaned forward to kiss my forehead. "Something has come up at RangeMan headquarters. He's going to be a while longer."

I nodded, understanding that the something was most likely my rapist. "You have him?"

Lester let out a deep breath. "Yes, Beautiful and he will never hurt you again." His voice was cold and angry, a tone he rarely used around me but I knew that meant he was preparing for a fight.

"Please don't do anything you'll regret or that will get you into legal trouble, please." I made eye contact with each of them as Bobby returned to the room with a glass of water and some pills for me.

"Don't worry about us, Chica." Hector gave me a playful wink. I tried to relax but didn't know what to say or how to thank them. Hector and Lester simply kissed my cheeks and said goodbye as I struggled with my emotions.

Bobby handed me the water and pills before sitting down next to me. "Bomber, you know we know what we're doing. Truly, you can relax about us."

Swallowing my pills, I nodded and tried to take a deep cleansing breath. "I don't know how to thank you all."

"You don't have to." He squeezed my hand and smiled. "Want some good news?"

Letting out a deep sigh, I smiled. "Yes, please."

"You can stop taking the antibiotics. All of your blood tests came back clean. You're healthy." His words lifted a giant stone from my shoulders.

I threw my arms around him and laughed from joy. "Thanks, Bobby. That's awesome news." Pulling back from the hug, I couldn't help but feel elation that just maybe this would be the beginning of my healing process.

"I spent some time looking into counselors for you." Bobby's eyes searched mine as he spoke. "I got a reference from RangeMan's preferred combat counselor. He has a lot of experience with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and he suggested that you speak with Dr. MaryAnn Lewis." He handed me a file folder. "There are three suggestions in there with some information about them. Choose whoever you want. They've all cleared RangeMan security checks."

I took the folder but shook my head. "I'll go with Dr. Lewis, if that's the suggestion you think is best."

Bobby nodded. "I can set-up the appointment for you. Someone from RangeMan will go along to make sure you stay safe and out of any public eye."

"With me?" I was glad to be kept out of the public eye but I didn't want anyone sitting in on the appointment and listening into my fears and thoughts.

"No, no." Bobby reached out for my hand. "Just as a bodyguard and no one will go inside with you. What you talk about is between you and Dr. Lewis, I promise, Steph."

"Of course, I should've known better." I hadn't meant to freak out on him, but I was overwhelmed. "I need to cancel dinner with my parents on Sunday." My mind was racing but I knew that Bobby would be able to keep up.

"Why don't we call them?" Bobby reached for my phone on the coffee table.

My hands started wringing as I chewed on my lip again. "What do I tell them? They can't know about what happened."

"Let's tell them you've been called out of town on RangeMan business, hm?" Bobby's hands rested on mine. I knew he was trying to calm my nerves and give me a plausible excuse.

"That's good, yeah, that's good." My voice cracked as I thought about lying. I wasn't very good at lying and was worried that my mother would see through it.

Bobby moved and put his arm around me, pulling me into his side. "Put it on speaker and I can call for you, getting you off the phone and out of dinner quickly."

My hands shook as I dialed but Bobby stayed close and as promised when it looked like my mother was getting an upper hand, he stepped in. When I hung up I felt more relief. I knew I would have to face my family eventually, but I wanted to be mostly free of bruises when I did it.

Next, Bobby called the counselor's office. He kept it on speaker allowing me to hear everything that was happening. The receptionist asked for general details which Bobby gave gently as well as dropping the name of the counselor who had referred us to Dr. Lewis. An appointment was made for Monday morning. When he hung up, I got nervous.

"It's fast." Suddenly the idea of leaving Tank's house and talking to a stranger about what had happened terrified me. I stood up and began pacing, my body needing some movement to stop the tears.

Bobby watched and talked to me, his voice soothing. "It is fast, Steph, but she'll be gentle and this will be helpful to you. Besides, one of us will be right outside the door and if you want to leave, we'll take you home immediately."

Letting out a deep breath through pursed lips, I nodded. Of course, the guys would have an exit strategy. I also knew that Bobby would never advise something he wasn't sure of. I knew he was looking out for me and that I had to trust in his judgment.

Bobby hung out with me for hours, helping me make a little something for dinner and relaxing on the couch with me. Tank came home as the sun was setting outside. I couldn't quite figure out the mood he was carrying as he entered the door. Still, I practically ran to him, throwing myself at him for a hug.

Tank wrapped me up in his arms and hugged me gently but tightly. "I didn't mean to be gone so long, Little Girl. Are you okay?"

"Better now that you're home." I whispered in his ear causing him to smile against my cheek.

He released me and looked at Bobby, the two of them silently communicating for a bit. Bobby packed up to leave and kissed my cheek at the door as he said goodbye.

"Thanks for everything Bobby. I, I know it's not enough." I chewed on my lip as I made eye contact.

"It's more than enough, no thanks are even necessary." He said before hugging me and leaving.

Tank smiled at me as he walked into the kitchen for a drink. I watched him curiously, not sure exactly what I should say or if I should ask about Mathis. He tilted his head and answered my unasked question. "I got my hands on him and we set Robbins free today but I promise neither of them will hurt you ever again."

Tears rolled down my cheek at the news, but I couldn't quite tell if they were happy or sad. Tank wiped them away with his thumbs and gave me a sad smile. "Are you hungry? I can heat up some leftovers for you." I knew I should have some questions or a better response to the news he'd given me but I couldn't think about it at the moment.

He chuckled and nodded. "I am, but I want to take a shower too. I'll run up and do that if you don't mind reheating the food."

I heard the shower water running as I stuck a plate in the microwave for him but suddenly being downstairs by myself was too overwhelming. Wanting to be closer to Tank, I sat at the top of the stairs and listened to him moving in the bathroom. When he opened the door, he was obviously surprised to see me sitting there. "Steph?"

"I just wanted to be close to you. Am I being too clingy?" He had been such a rock, such a comfort to me that I had a hard time thinking of not clinging to him, but I didn't want to drive him away either.

"It's okay, Little Girl. You're not clingy at all." He gave me a supportive smile and took my hand as we went back into the kitchen.

While he ate, I drank some tea and felt more comfortable in my own skin for a bit. The smell of Tank's soap filled my nose, replacing the scent of Mathis. I felt relaxed and safe, something I was beginning to doubt that I'd ever feel again. The guys had made me safe, but feeling it was something else and combining it with relaxation gave me hope that I would someday be whole again.

When it was time for bed, Tank held my hand up the steps. At the top, I got nervous and wondered if I was overstepping my bounds. "Do you want your bed to yourself? Should I take the guest room?"

His eyes softened and I couldn't be sure, but I think he was hurt by my question. "Is that what you want Steph? Do you need some space?"

"No, I like sleeping with you. I feel safer there next to you. I just don't want to ask for too much. You're doing so much already." I could feel myself blush, nervous of his rejection and of being too needy.

Tank tugged on my hand. "I like having you next to me. Come to bed."

As I snuggled under the covers and against his large body, I relaxed and knew that whatever nightmares came, whether dreams or reality he would be there. I was determined to fight back against my trauma and knew that with Tank by my side that I'd get there eventually.


	9. Chapter 9

_Continued thanks to my beta Cristi0819 who read multiple revisions of this chapter. _

_**Chapter 9 - Tank's POV**_

Steph's head was resting on my chest, her arm thrown lazily around my waist. I'd been awake for a little while, as it was an hour past my normal wake-up time. Her night had been rough. She'd had two bad nightmares. Both times she woke up screaming and both times I held her as she cried.

Holding her as she cried made me glad that I was here for her and glad that I'd gotten my hands on Mathis earlier in the day. I'd broken every single one of his fingers, slowly. Hal and Vince had brought him in and had obviously done a pretty thorough job of beating him before tossing him in the holding cell. Hal and Vince were some of the quietest among the soldiers of RangeMan, but they were just as lethal and it was obvious that they had exposed Mathis to their silent rage.

They'd followed him from his job, ironically to the Blue Moon. He obviously had no fear of returning to the scene of the crime, most likely confident in Robbins' silence and Steph's inability to identify him. Hal and Vince were able to catch him in the deserted alley as he tried to go in the back door. It was a lucky break that the bar wasn't yet busy and that they were skilled enough to stun and throw him into their truck quickly without being noticed.

In the holding cell, I found Mathis cowering in the corner, holding his hands above his head, trying to protect himself and beg for mercy at the same time. His words and the mere sight of him brought out the animal in me. I thought about those hands holding down my Little Girl as he forced himself on her and I snapped. I broke his fingers, delighting in his screams of agony as his bones cracked under my strength.

Thinking about his large, slimy body on top of Steph's soft, glowing one released a part of me that I had kept coiled up inside for years. Previously that rage had only come out during missions and a few other professional jobs. I knew how to keep that part of me locked up but thinking of Steph's tears and insecurities all because of what he'd done to her let the animal in me escape.

I'd learned to torture from some the best in the business. I'd been taught techniques in the military and even been tortured and knew how to apply those same things to others. It was a part of my life that I didn't think about much. I didn't enjoy torturing someone, usually, I found it necessary but not something I wanted to do to another human being. Mathis, however, brought all the memories of just how to hurt someone to the forefront of my mind and I enjoyed every second of making him scream and cry. Oh, I wasn't trying to make him talk. I simply wanted him to break.

I beat him mercilessly, just short of killing him. The only reason I didn't kill him was because I knew I needed to save a few pieces for Hector, Lester and Bobby. Tactically, it was a better choice to leave him alive for Ranger to deal with in Miami. This way we could all deny any involvement, just in case Mathis' body did wash up somewhere. Still, controlling my emotions was something I found very hard to do with Mathis in front of me.

Steph stirred against my chest, her body quivering a bit as she shuddered. Her dreams bringing me back to the present, I ran my fingers along her hairline. "Shh, Little Girl. Everything's ok, you're okay. I'm here now, he can't hurt you anymore." This had happened a few times throughout the night, in addition to the screaming episodes. I was able to comfort her during these smaller ones and keep her asleep.

I rolled us over onto our sides, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her into my chest. She burrowed her head into my neck, hiding her tiny body inside my arms. I held her tighter to me whispering more words of comfort into her ear. She quieted, molding her body closer to mine and making me smile knowing that I gave her security. I wanted to do that for as long as she would let me.

James Mathis would never bother her again. I couldn't protect her from the memory or the nightmares, but I knew I could protect her from any future encounters. I was second guessing my decision to let Robbins go. I knew it was the right decision to avoid scrutiny, but knowing that he was still around bothered me.

While holding Steph in my arms was giving her security, it was also giving me peace. I had no regrets about what I'd done to Robbins or Mathis, but letting that animal loose had consequences. Torturing another human being, taking a life, was never easy no matter how well deserved and it took a piece of me away each time. Having Steph's soft body and sweet soul relying on me eased the ache that came with losing my own humanity for a window of time. Knowing that I'd enjoyed hurting them both did make me wonder momentarily if my soul was too ugly for Steph, but I was determined to be worthy of her by any means necessary. Even if she decided that my heart was too black to be with me romantically, I would never be sorry for doing anything and everything possible to keep her safe.

Steph stretched a bit and I could tell she was starting to wake up, despite the early hour. I kept my fingers on her face as her eyes fluttered open. Her lips turned up into a smile against my cheek. "Morning." Her voice was raspy with sleep as her breath tickled my neck.

I kissed her forehead, lingering there for a second trying to delight in this quiet moment. She wasn't anxious or afraid and after the last few days I was glad to see that and imagined she had to be, too. "How are you Little Girl?"

"Good." She sighed, her arm squeezing me just slightly. "I'm sorry if my nightmares kept you awake last night, but I was so glad you were here."

Holding the small of her back, pulling her body into mine even more, I shook my head. "I want to be here for you Steph. Please don't apologize for giving me the gift of providing you with something you need."

She shifted, moving so that she could look at my face. Her fingers traced my jaw making me smile as her blue eyes met mine. "I don't know what I did to deserve you but whatever it is, I'm grateful." I kissed her nose as her words echoed exactly how I was feeling.

We lay in bed, our arms around each other, and talked casually for a while. It felt so normal and relaxed between us, like we'd been doing it for years and I found my heart wishing for a lifetime just like this. I hated the trauma that had been the cause of sending her to my bed, but I was still so grateful to be the one she turned to and hoped that she would stay here even after she recovered.

"Steph, Ranger is coming to Trenton for a few days." I wasn't sure how she'd take the news but I found it impossible to keep from her, even though I'd planned on doing it later in the day. I'd called Ranger before coming home last night. Woody would fly down to Miami to get him tomorrow and he'd stay in town for a few days before leaving with our prisoner. Woody was the standard RangeMan pilot but he also would not be bothered by noises from the cabin as Ranger meted out his own justice on Mathis.

She met my eyes and nodded. A tornado of emotions whirled in her eyes causing me to hold my breath as I waited for her reaction. "What does that mean? Do I have do something?"

"I'm just letting you know that he's going to be in town. You don't have to see him or talk to him unless you want to. Steph, I will never make you do something you don't want to do." I wanted her to be assured that I wouldn't force things on her even for her own good, like Ranger had a tendency to do and that I wasn't going to manipulate or guilt her into things like Morelli.

"I think I'd like to see him." She started chewing on lip and I wanted to punch myself for taking her from content to anxious. Letting out a deep breath, her fingers slid down my arm and squeezed my hand. "Will you stay with me when I see him?"

Her question made me smile. "Of course, Little Girl, if that's what you want." I knew she knew he'd never hurt her, but something about setting boundaries with him made my heart skip a beat. I knew it was too early to be thinking like that, but at the same time I couldn't help but like that she wanted me with her. Hope flared in my heart at the knowledge that any emotional connections he might have had with her were gone.

She kissed my chin and stretched her body against mine under the covers. A small wince that she tried to hide let me know that she still ached. I wasn't surprised by that considering what she'd been through, but her pain was harder for me to stomach than my own would have been.

I made coffee and breakfast as Steph climbed into the shower. Her need to wash up was still so apparent and as much as I wanted to reassure her that she was clean, I knew I needed to let her figure that out on her own. I would tell her once Mathis was eliminated and hoped that on some level that would ease her emotional turmoil and nightmares.

We ate a leisurely meal together while she filled me in on her day yesterday. Yet again I was impressed by her strength. She tried to downplay it, pointing out that the guys had helped her, but I wouldn't let her do that. Making her see her light was a goal of mine. Helping her understand how awesome she was would be something I would work on each and every day.

As she finished telling me about the counseling appointment, I noticed that she got nervous and chewed on her bottom lip. Reaching for her hands I gave her a smile. "What's wrong?"

"Bobby said a bodyguard from RangeMan would go along." She looked down at her plate, obviously searching for words.

"Of course, Steph. We're just looking out for you. We won't impinge on your privacy." I didn't want her to feel forced into having a shadow, but at the same time I didn't want to leave her alone either. Keeping her exposure to the public and potential rumors limited for a while seemed prudent to her healing.

"No, I know that. Could you come along?" She met my eyes and saw her nervousness there.

I nodded and smiled at her. "Sure, I'll be in the waiting room the entire time."

She exhaled and visibly relaxed at my assurance. I wanted to go with her, but was trying to give her as much independence as she needed. She opened her mouth to say something when my phone rang. She smiled and nodded as I stood to answer it.

"Yo." I tried not to sound angry, but I was irritated by the interruption. Ignoring the call wasn't an option right now with everything that was going on, but part of me still just wanted to have the day focusing on the beautiful woman in my house.

The voice that greeted me on the other end of the line surprised me as I hadn't looked at the ID before answering. "Tank, this is Joe Morelli and I need to talk to you about Damien Robbins."

My jaw clenched as I chose my words carefully. If Robbins had reported us, he would be dead by Monday. "What about him, Morelli?" I used his name on purpose, making sure Steph was kept in the loop. She looked at me with surprise, but remained calm.

"The Fire Chief said he turned up all bruised and beaten. I know he was dating Stephanie." He let out a deep breath. "I figured you would have some information, not necessarily about his beating, but about him. Apparently there are some rumors and the chief is all kind of concerned. I also wanted to make sure Steph was okay." The concern in his voice was evident. He and Steph had broken up over six months ago now. At first it was rough, but they'd settled into a casual friendship. No matter what had transpired between them he wasn't going to stand for her being harmed.

I wanted to know about the rumors and I wanted to keep RangeMan out of any investigation. "Meet me at RangeMan in an hour." I offered as a way to keep it off the record and casual.

He hung up and I went to Steph, who was already wringing her hands. I squatted down in front of her, resting my hands on her knees. "I'm sorry, Little Girl. I won't be long. Is there someone special you'd like to have stay here with you?"

She slipped her hands into mine and gave a slight squeeze. "What does Joe want?"

"To talk about Robbins." My voice was more of a growl than I intended.

She nodded. "Can I go with you? If you're in any kind of trouble, I want Joe to see me. If he needs to know details so that you're all kept off the police radar, I'll share it."

Having her do that for me wasn't an option, but I wouldn't force her to hide either. Morelli wasn't a dumb man, he'd figure out that I'd beaten Robbins and that Robbins had hurt Steph and that would be enough. "Absolutely, you can come along, if you're sure."

Steph was nervous as I helped her out of the car in the RangeMan garage. She knew she was safe, her but it was a stretch to have her out around so many people right now. I'd texted Hector before we left my house and I knew that he'd take care of making sure the guys were extra gentle with her.

We took the elevator to the fourth floor. Steph had hidden herself behind me, both her hands wrapped around my arm and squeezing almost painfully, her anxiety reaching a fevered pitch. "Steph, it's okay, you can just hide out in my office or go upstairs to Lester's apartment if you want." Lester had said he'd stay there as a back-up sanctuary just in case.

The doors opened and I heard her let out a deep breath. You could feel the energy of the men who were there working. Everyone obviously wanted to talk to Steph to check on her, but everyone was also warring with the need to give her space.

Cal came out of the supply closet as we turned the hallway corner to my office. He gave Steph a broad, sympathetic smile. "How ya feeling, Bomber?" He kept his distance, not invading her space.

She sighed and moved just slightly to the side of me, exposing herself a bit instead of hiding. I was so proud of her in that moment. I knew she was still scared but she was trying so very hard to overcome it. "Better, thanks, Cal."

He gave her another smile and nodded at me before moving on his way. It seemed like such a simple exchange for Steph, it was unusually reserved, but it still held the promise that the shining light of a woman we all knew and loved was still inside the battered shell.

Binkie was working the front desk and called when Joe was on his way up to my office. Steph had been sitting on my couch but the news made her move. Her anxiety drew her closer to me and while I didn't want her to be anxious or upset again, I liked setting boundaries with Joe. I wanted him to know that it might be unofficial right now, but for the time being I was the man taking care of her.

I pulled a chair around my desk for her so that she could sit next to me while Joe sat on the other side. She thanked me for the gesture just as a knock at the door alerted us to company.

Turning to face to the door, I felt Steph slide behind me just slightly and reach for my hand. Lacing my fingers with hers, I gave it a squeeze before telling Joe to come in.

Morelli's face registered shock then anger as he looked from me to Steph and back again. "Cupcake?" He took a step towards Steph out of concern, but the motion made her gasp and step behind me even more. I gave her hand a squeeze and shook my head at Morelli, it was a slight shake but he knew not to test me either.

"Have a seat, Joe." I pointed to a chair across the desk. Steph and I followed suit, her hand gripping mine tightly and keeping it in her lap. The action wasn't lost on Morelli but he didn't say anything.

Running his hand through his hair Morelli looked at me, his eyes hard and fierce. "Did Robbins do that?" Normally talking about Steph instead of to her would have sent her into Rhino mode, but today she was obviously willing to let me do the talking.

"Not directly, but he put things in motion to let it happen." My words came out as a growl as I processed what had been done to her once again. "Now, what can I do for you?"

"I guess I have my answers. I was going to ask if he'd hurt Steph, if you'd all beaten him up though he hasn't said that, and I was going to ask about rumors of him being physical with his dates."

That was a rumor I hadn't heard. If I had, I would've taken more steps to protect Steph. I wasn't going to answer Morelli's questions and I'm sure he knew it. There was no way I would incriminate myself or RangeMan. Besides, I knew Joe didn't mind bending the rules now and then as long as justice was served.

He chuckled. "I don't expect you to answer, but from what I can tell Robbins got into a bar fight and he's too embarrassed to talk about it." Morelli turned his head and looked at Steph. "Would you like to press charges, Steph?"

None of us had asked her if she wanted to go that route. We were all so blinded with our need to avenge what had happened that we never thought to ask her if she wanted to handle this in the court system. His question made me worry that she might have wanted to do this differently and that we'd forced something else on her.

She shook her head, her blue eyes stormy as she looked at me and then him. "No, there's nothing to charge him with, but thanks, Joe."

Joe nodded and stood up to leave. "Steph, if there's anything you need please don't hesitate to call." He wasn't a stupid man, I was sure he was coming to his own conclusions about what had happened to her.

"Tank's taking good care of me, don't worry." She smiled at Joe and squeezed my hand as she talked. It wasn't unusual for Steph to play off her own troubles in favor of making someone else feel better, but I still didn't want her to do that. My heart did skip a beat at how she bragged about my care of her.

After Joe left, Steph took a few minutes to say hello to Bobby, Hector and Lester. All of them obviously a bit lighter after exacting their own revenge against Mathis. If I hadn't had Steph along I would have gone back down to the holding cell to spend some time with him myself. Watching her talk to the guys even letting Ram and Vince in on the conversation without too much anxiety, however; soothed me almost as much as beating on Mathis would have. However, watching her interact with the guys without too much anxiety, and even letting Ram and Vince in on the conversation soothed me almost as much as beating on Mathis. I would make sure to visit him one more time before Ranger took him away, but for the rest of today I was content to bask in the glow of Stephanie as figured out how to heal in her own special way.


	10. Chapter 10

_Continued __thanks __to __my __incredible __beta__ (__I__'__m __officially __changing __Beta __to __Besta__): __Crist__0819._

_Also __thanks __to __everyone __who__'__s __left __a __review __o r__comment__. __You __keep __me __going __and g__ive __me __so __many __ideas__. __I__'__ve __tried __to __respond __to __some __comments __in __the __last __few __days __but __have __been __having __issues __with __fanfiction __messaging__. __Please __know __it __means __the __world __to __me __to __know __that __you __are __continuing __to __read __this __story __of __mine__._

_**Chapter**__** 10 - **__**Steph**__**'**__**s**__**POV**_

It'd been a month since I was raped and tonight Tank was reinstating the Wednesday night poker game. The guys had put it off, trying to give me space and they were even a bit resistant to do it tonight, but I insisted. Dr. Lewis had told me that it would be good for me to try things in a less protected manner, meaning not having Tank, Hector, Lester or Bobby scare everyone who came close to me away. In the end, poker night seemed like a way to allow me to hang out with the Merry Men, have a little normal fun, and still feel completely safe.

The last month had been a whirlwind and most of it seemed hazy. At least, everything but the rape was hazy. That seemed to live with me in vivid detail most of the time. The counseling appointments were helping dramatically, but I still felt like I had so very far to go. The nightmares were still there, but they were less frequent and not as intense as before. I was able to make simple decisions more easily now thanks to some techniques Dr. Lewis taught me.

Straying too far from Tank was something I still couldn't do for long periods of time. I was still living in his house, sleeping in his bed for that matter, and going nowhere without him. He didn't seem to mind at all, but I worried that I was becoming a burden to him and preventing him from living a life outside of being my caretaker. It was occupying so much of my mental space this week that I brought it up to Dr. Lewis on Monday.

Dr. Lewis said it wasn't unusual for a victim to latch onto a hero and create an emotional bond, but she and I thought there was more to my feelings for Tank than that. I knew I needed to talk to Tank, figure out these emotions I was having for him, and learn just exactly what he was feeling towards me. There was no doubt that my feelings towards him had intensified in recent weeks but I believe that they were always hidden within me on a smaller level.

Tank's commitment to me seemed to be more than just that of a friend, caretaker, or even hero. Still, I didn't want to assume that or become some kind of fragile stone around his neck. I needed to get what was happening between us clear in my head as I recovered so that I didn't create a fantasy to escape my nightmare.

Ranger was in town and coming to play poker tonight. It was the first time I'd seen him since the Sunday after the rape. The day he and Tank let me know that Mathis was leaving town and would never return. I didn't ask for details and they didn't provide any. I was able to read between the lines and while I hated having them do something so drastic for me, I couldn't find it in me to feel bad either.

It was a brief encounter with Ranger that day. I was such a mess and unable to focus or eat the lunch Ella had made for us. While he wore his usual blank face, I knew that my attack and my distress was hard on him. Beyond the trauma of my attack, he wasn't the one who could comfort me. Tank had filled that role and while Bobby, Hector and Lester had become hugely important in my support circle, it was Tank who had become my comfort and melted all the history that Ranger and I once had.

It seemed all of the Merry Men wanted to come tonight, so many that Tank had to limit participation. Lester, Hector, and Bobby were a given and as Ranger was so rarely in town there was no way he could be excluded. Cal, Ram, and Woody were the rest who made the cut for tonight's game. It would be fun to hang out with them all and I knew in the coming weeks that the Merry Men would rotate in and out of the game. I knew most of them were cheering me on and doing their best to give me space while still desiring to be close. Their quiet support and fierce protection fed me strength.

For the past two weeks, I'd been working at RangeMan, doing searches and paperwork. It felt good to work again and to be productive. The Merry Men were patient with me and I was adjusting to being around all of them again, though I was still very jumpy and didn't like to be touched very much. I knew they had all helped in keeping me safe, but I didn't know how to thank them. Bobby reminded me again and again that those thanks weren't necessary.

Pouring some chips into a bowl, I watched as Tank set up chairs around the table. It seemed like we had fallen into a rather simple domesticity, like some old married couple not like two people thrown together out of fear and heart ache. It scared me to think of him not feeling the same way, that I might have to leave his home, but at the same time it didn't seem fair to hold him hostage to a relationship when I might never be whole, might not ever be able to be intimate.

"I smell smoke." Tank said, chuckling as my eye brows furrowed wondering what he meant. "You're thinking really hard, Steph. Everything ok? Do you still want to do this? I can cancel."

I shook my head. "Lots on my mind, but none of it is bad. I'm good for tonight. I need to do this. Besides it'll be fun."

He had moved to stand in front of me and I couldn't help but smile up at him as he pulled on one of my curls. "It will be fun. I'm so proud of you, Steph."

A ring of the doorbell made me jump. Tank squeezed my hand and kissed my forehead in an effort to calm my nerves. "It's probably Bobby with the food."

As usual, he grabbed a gun before looking out the peephole. Tank had a way about doing things that while could easily be over-the-top just seemed normal. He made no apologies for his behavior, but he didn't make a show of it either. He tucked the gun away and opened the door.

Bobby came in carrying a giant metal pot. "I made chili." He smiled and looked at me then back to Tank. "The fixings are in the back seat." Tank went out to grab the other stuff while Bobby put the chili on the range before giving me a hug. "How much money am I going to take off your hands tonight, Bomber?" He chuckled before grabbing items out of the box Tank had brought in.

I helped Bobby get the chili and fixings ready as Tank took care of each guest as they arrived. Hector and Lester were next and were the last of the people I knew I could hug without a doubt. I was going to try to hug everyone tonight, try for just a moment to let someone else who I knew wouldn't hurt me touch me.

Cal, Ram, and Woody arrived next. Tank announced it was them before opening the door, giving me a chance to ready myself for someone outside of the norm. I stood at the entrance of the kitchen as they came in and were handed beers by Lester.

The tension in the room was thick and I knew it was because everyone was unsure of what to do, how to act around me and that I needed to be the one to change the mood. I stepped up to Cal, "I'm feeling lucky tonight, so you better have your wallet." He laughed and let me step into his space. I opened my arms and relaxed as his eyes twinkled at me. He let me embrace him, his arms encircling me gently before giving me a small squeeze. It was a timid hug for both me and Cal, but still it held such promise and I found that with one out of the way giving one to Ram and Woody didn't seem quite so panic inducing.

Each of their hugs were different and tentative. I knew they were trying hard not to frighten me, to give me the contact I needed without making me feel trapped. The safety of their strong arms outweighed the fear of being touched and I was reminded again that these were my friends. There was no doubt in my mind that Hector had probably talked to them at RangeMan earlier today.

Hector always seemed to be doing things behind the scenes. He didn't think I knew, but it was obvious that the guys were afraid of Hector and that he took care of giving them advance warning of how the Bombshell was doing. I should have been irritated by the discussion of me and my needs behind my back, but I couldn't find it in me to fault them for their loving care when I was so very fragile.

Everyone was filling up their chili bowls and snacking on chips when the doorbell rang again. Assuming it was Ranger, I went with Tank to the door. I wanted to be able to greet him without the others watching too closely.

Before Ranger left for Miami several months ago, we talked at length about what it was that was between us. He affirmed over and over again that he just wasn't relationship material and that while he cared for me deeply he could never give me more that what we had, that he would never be able to emotionally connect on a more intimate level. It wasn't enough for me and while I didn't want him to leave town, it seemed like the only way for either one of us to truly move on was for there to be physical distance. Neither one of us were capable of creating and maintaining a separation of any sort without there being some miles between us. I was heartbroken for a while, but in the end I know it was for the best not just for me, but for him too.

Ranger stepped through the door way and nodded at Tank before his eyes looked me over. The last time he'd seen me I was still a bruised, battered mess. I was still anxious but the physical bruises had healed. "Babe."

I smiled and stepped into his embrace, not surprised really that with all our history that his was the easiest new hug to accept. His familiar and comforting Bulgari scent enveloped me allowing me to exhale deeply and relax into the aura that was Ranger. Even with the months apart and the recent trauma he still exuded a force-field of supportive safety of which I knew I could count on for the rest of my life. Our connection had changed but I always knew that we would be able to rely on one another as friends.

In the kitchen, the guys did their standard nods and handshakes before sitting around the table. The poker game was always a friendly affair and the stakes low. Still, it seemed like the Merry Men were lighter during these moments, more human and less superhuman. They would always be superheroes to me, but I liked seeing their compassionate sides, their humanity as well. Knowing that these amazing strong men with soft, gentle hearts were in my corner made me truly feel like Wonder Woman.

As expected the night was fun, but I was surprised that I didn't feel anxious. For the few hours that we played I felt normal and not like a traumatized woman. Ram was winning most of the hands and money when I started to feel tired. I tried to hide the yawn but should have known that nothing would get by this group.

They wrapped up the last hand and started to make their way out. As everyone left I was able to walk them to the door and give them each hugs, more naturally than before. It was such a small thing, but it signified something large to me. Because of this poker night and the patience of the Merry Men, I knew I was going to be less nervous around the rest of them at the office from now on.

Tank and Ranger were sitting at the table talking quietly after I'd said my last goodbye to Bobby. I figured I should let them talk without me and made my way to the bathroom to wash up for bed.

I still felt the need to obsessively wash and scrub though that too was getting less intense with the counseling sessions. Mathis' smell wasn't on me as much though I did catch a whiff of it now and then, but I was able to remind myself that it was merely anxiety, not a true scent these days. Dr. Lewis had given me some techniques to deal with the feelings of filthiness and I did my best to not scrub myself raw each and every time I climbed into the shower.

Walking down the stairs, I could hear Ranger and Tank still talking, but their voices had gotten harder, angrier. Looking over the banister I saw them standing and talking as if they had started to move towards the front door but got distracted. I hadn't reached the bottom step when I heard Ranger ask, "Where is she sleeping?"

"It's none of your business." Tank growled.

Ranger let out a small, deep chuckle. "With you, then. Tank, I don't want to hear that you're taking advantage of her fragile state."

Tank stepped in front of Ranger then, his fists curled up at his side. Ranger didn't move but there was a definite tension between them that I was unaccustomed to. "It's because you're my oldest friend that I'm not knocking your head off your shoulders for insulting me like that. You should know better." Tank's voice was low and gravely with a tone of anger that made me shiver a bit.

Ranger put his hands up and nodded, effectively diffusing the situation between them. "There's an apartment open on four if she wants it."

"She knows and so far she's chosen to stay here and I won't force her out. I like her here and as long as she wants to stay that's what will happen." Tank and I had talked about the apartment, but I wasn't quite ready to live on my own. I was still paying rent on my old apartment, but knew that I had to make a decision about it quickly, too. Hearing Tank say that he wanted me here with him lifted a bit of that weight from my shoulders and I knew I could talk to him about giving up that place and moving all my stuff out.

I turned the corner from the stairwell to the kitchen and smiled, knowing that they'd notice me now. They stopped talking, both of their blank faces appearing as they turned to look at me. "There's supposed to be no work discussion on poker night." I hadn't wanted to eavesdrop on their conversation and I figured this was the best way to diffuse whatever was going on between them.

"Babe." Ranger chuckled as he shook his head. "I'll see you at the office tomorrow." He stepped forward and gave me a quick hug before Tank showed him out.

I watched as Tank closed the door and set his alarm system. I was completely in awe of him and his careful movements. Tank was fierce and strong and yet so very tender with me that I often found it hard to believe that both sides could live inside the same man.

He smiled as he approached me, taking mine hand in his. "Everything okay, Steph? You seemed relaxed, like you had fun tonight."

"Everything is great. I did have fun. Thank you." I nodded and squeezed his hand before moving into the kitchen to finish cleaning up the mess. I found myself watching Tank's body and muscles move as he loaded the dishwasher, surprised to find myself thinking about him in a physical way.

Those thoughts had me so distracted that I didn't think to censor my words or buffer them for him in any way. "I want to give up my apartment. I'd like to stay here for a while still, if that's okay with you, but I don't want to keep paying rent on a place I never go to."

He turned to look at me his face shocked but wearing a huge grin. "Steph, of course it's okay. I told you, you're welcome here as long as you want. I like having you here."

Letting out a deep breath I smiled at him but then instantly felt overwhelmed at the prospect of actually moving out and gathering my few belongings. My hands started twisting around each other, an anxiety tick that I'd picked up since the rape. Tank noticed and stepped in front of me, taking my hands in his. "What's wrong?"

"I just got overwhelmed at the idea of doing it all. I'm sorry, I had a really good time tonight and I'm trying so hard to get better but I just get overwhelmed sometimes." That was the understatement of the century. I got overwhelmed it seemed like at least once a day, things that used to be so easy and commonplace just put me over some edge I hadn't known existed.

Tank ran his knuckle down my cheek and gave me a soft smile. "We'll tackle it together and I have no doubt Hector and Lester will want to help too." I leaned into his touch a bit, relaxing as I always did when he was close by. "Steph, it's normal for you to feel a bit overwhelmed still and I know you're trying hard. You're doing so well, but it's just going to take time, don't rush it."

Again a yawn escaped my mouth without my permission as I nodded at his words of encouragement. He chuckled and tugged on my hand. "Come on, let's get some sleep."

I climbed into bed wearing one of Tank's t-shirts as he changed in the bathroom. He always came to bed in a tank top and a pair of basketball shorts. His dark, strong shoulders and legs peeking out from underneath the clothes. The strength, security, and masculinity that he exuded tugged at my heart. Indeed, he made me feel safe, but everything about him just screamed comfort on every level and I found myself constantly trying to get closer to him.

Parts of me were completely buried and reserved and while I couldn't help but notice how incredibly handsome and sexy he was, I still couldn't fathom exploring that. It was those thoughts that made me feel like staying here was wrong, that I could be keeping him from finding a woman that could give him everything he deserved.

He crawled into bed next to me and as usual pulled me into his side, my head resting on his chest. "What are you thinking about Little Girl?"

"That I'm being unfair to you." I needed to have this conversation with him, but tonight didn't seem like the right time, though my brain obviously couldn't censor itself.

Tank tipped my chin up to look at him. "You're not being unfair. I want you here, like having you in this house, in this bed with me." He let out a deep breath. "Steph, I know things are a little emotionally confusing between us right now. I know you're going through a lot and I'm trying not to add to everything that's swimming around in your mind. Just now that I want you here, that I care for you deeply and we'll just figure things out as they come."

A tear escaped my eye at his words. "Thank you." Again, he knew what I was thinking and needed before I was able to voice it. "I care for you too, deeper than I can fully express or realize right now, but it's no less true."

He smiled and kissed my nose. "Get some sleep, Steph. We'll tackle tomorrow, tomorrow."

I rested my head back on his chest and took comfort in the rhythm of his beating heart in my ear. It was a small step, a brief conversation, but in having it, in listening to his words I knew that it was important. My journey was full of small steps it seemed, but they were adding up to something great and I knew that I just needed to continue to trust in those small steps.


	11. Chapter 11

_My besta, Cristi0819, deserves so much more credit than I give her in these brief moments of thanks, she is truly incredible. Thanks Babe!_

_**Chapter 11 - Tank's POV**_

Bobby and I loaded a few boxes into my truck before saying goodbye. We'd spent most the afternoon clearing out Steph's old apartment. Hector and Lester with some help from some of the other guys had come by yesterday and cleared out all of her furniture. She had decided to donate it rather than keep any of it. I liked thinking that she had plans to stay with me so long term that she didn't need furniture.

Most of her clothes, shoes, and other toiletries were already at my house so today was just a matter of going through drawers and cabinets to pack the remaining dishes, towels, and other stuff she might want to keep. Boxes of items she wanted to keep were going to be stored in my garage for the time being.

I couldn't help but feel hopeful about a future with her knowing that she was staying with me and getting rid of her belongings. There was no rush and I was doing my best to show her how I feel without adding any pressure or anxiety to her days. She was doing well, better than anyone expected this quickly after the attack, but she was still fragile.

Walking back up the steps to her apartment, I was reminded of just how far she'd come. She'd stayed upstairs by herself multiple times today. Granted, it wasn't for a long period of time and we were just outside, but even a week ago she wouldn't have been able to do that, would have had to come along with us. I liked having her beside me, loved feeling the trust she had in me to keep her safe but I liked watching her getting some of her courage and independence back even more.

When we were done here we were heading to her parent's house for Sunday dinner. Last week was the first one she'd gone to since the attack and I'd gone then too. Dinner with her parents and grandma was an adventure to put it mildly, but they sensed that something was off with her and were surprisingly gentle. I didn't want to have to defend her in front of them but I was prepared to do so if they made her anxious.

I called her name when I got back into the apartment wanting to make sure I didn't startle her. She didn't answer, but I knew she was going through some stuff in her bedroom. Walking through the bedroom door I found her sitting on the floor, her eyes full of tears as she looked at something in her hands. "Steph?" I knelt in front of her reaching my hand out to touch her cheek.

She looked up at me, her eyes red and a few tears running down her cheeks. I'd seen her cry more in the last five weeks than I cared to think about and enough certainly to break my heart every day for the rest of my life, but still I wasn't used to it. Every time she cried it was like experiencing a new, harsher, more evil form of torture. "Damien..." She took in a shuddering breath.

"What about him Little Girl?" I tried not to growl as I thought about him. We still had trackers on his vehicles and I looked at them now and then, just to make sure he was staying far away from her. A few of the guys would make sure that Robbins caught sight of them once in a while, too, just so he couldn't relax. Every time Steph had a nightmare or a bad day I thought about finding him and beating him again. Mathis had been dealt with, but I still wanted someone to pay every time she experienced a rough patch. My hatred for him so deep that I didn't think I'd be able to control my temper if I happened to run into Robbins somewhere.

Steph handed me a strip of paper. I could tell it was from one of the photo booths at the carnival she'd gone to with Damien when he first asked her out. "What is it about me that I just seem to ignore warning signs? Dickie, Joe, Ranger, Damien, I don't know how to be in a relationship. I just didn't see how bad it all was and now because of what I let Damien and Mathis do..." She shook her head and wiped a tear from her cheek as she tried to clear her thoughts.

"Stephanie, you didn't let them do anything." Leaning forward I took her face in my hands, tilting her head up to meet my eyes. "Your pure heart makes it so that you always see the best in people. That's not a fault, that's a virtue. I will not allow you to blame yourself for being victimized." She didn't talk about what was discussed in her counseling sessions and I never asked, figuring she would open up when she wanted too but I hoped that these thoughts of self-blame were discussed.

Her tiny hand held one of mine against her cheek as her blue eyes searched mine. I loved her. I hadn't told her that yet, not wanting to add to all the crap she was dealing with, but it didn't make my love any less true. Leaning forward I went to kiss her nose, surprised when she shifted to meet my lips.

Our lips touched softly and tentatively for a brief kiss. I wanted more of it but knew that now was not the time. Resting my forehead on hers, my fingers caressed her cheeks as I inhaled her soft scent. I exhaled and kissed her nose, smiling at the slight sigh she let loose.

She wrapped her arms around my waist and leaned in for a hug, her nose resting in my neck. "I have deep feelings for you, Tank. I want you to know they're real and not because you've become my hero. You're that too, but I feel more than that. You're more than that to me."

My arms tightened around her, her words spurring my heart and soul. Those words from her lips gave me permission to hope and dream of a life with her by my side long after she'd healed and moved on from this brutal attack. "I have deep feelings for you too, Stephanie."

I felt her smile against my neck just before she kissed it lightly. "Slow?" Her voice was quiet, her question unasked, but I understood.

"I'm not going anywhere and there's no rush. I will never push you, Steph. Never." I meant every word I said. I would be staying with her as long as she wanted me, there was nowhere else on earth I wanted to be or any other person I wanted to be with.

She sat back slightly, her fingers tracing my jawline. A bright smile graced her gorgeous face as she leaned forward and gave me a quick peck of a kiss. "Thank you."

"We should get going to your parents." I wanted to keep her in my embrace for the entire night, but knew that we weren't in the right place at the moment and that it'd be better outside of this empty apartment.

I tucked the photo strip she'd given me into my back pocket, wanting to remove any and every reminder of Robbins from her tender soul. She packed up the last of her mementos as I walked through the apartment checking one last time to make sure everything of hers was removed. I took the last box from her arms and led us out to the car.

At her parent's house, we sat around the table and ate a rather relaxed meal. The normal craziness was knocked down a few notches. No doubt the lack of stories about Steph tracking down crazy skips was keeping the peace. There were no car bombs or newspaper coverage of late.

"When can I go catch a bad guy with you Steph?" Grandma Mazur's question came out of the blue as Helen brought in dessert.

"I'm not going to be doing bounty hunting anymore." Steph looked at me and blushed. We hadn't talked about her bond enforcement work and she was obviously embarrassed to be spilling her decision here, but I was glad for the news. I would have supported her desire to do it again and would have done my best to talk her into using a partner, but this was for the best given her current anxiety.

"What are you going to do for a job then?" Helen asked as she served the pineapple upside down cake.

I squeezed Steph's knee under the table, knowing that she got overwhelmed easily these days. She was handling her anxiety better but questions made her nervous and she still had some trouble with making decisions under pressure. She gave me a small smile before turning to look at her mom. "I'm working at RangeMan in the office and will continue doing that."

We finished dessert and Stephanie helped clean up leaving me at the table with her dad. Frank looked at me and rubbed his temples. "Something happened to my daughter. I don't expect you to break her confidence, but I do expect that you're taking care of her now."

Nodding, I met his eyes. "I'll do anything she needs." It was a weak response but I didn't know what else to say. He was right that I wasn't going to break her confidence. Even if I wanted to talk to him, how do you tell a father that his daughter was set up by her boyfriend to be raped in the backseat of a car outside of a bar? I rolled my shoulders and clenched my fist under the table. I tried to focus on Frank and not what had happened to the curly haired brunette in the next room.

"You care about her?" He asked as his fingers rested on the table in front of him.

"Yes, I do, very much. I know she's too good for me, but I'll die trying to be worthy of her." It was a brutally honest response and probably too much too soon for him to hear, but it flowed from me without censorship.

He smiled and nodded just as Steph, her grandma, and Helen reappeared from the kitchen. Steph had a small container in her hand and I knew Helen was sending her home with leftover dessert. Steph's face was beginning to show signs of tiredness. It had been a busy day and her energy level was still a little lower than it was before the attack. I know the strain of her anxiety was wearing on her physically as well as emotionally.

"Ready?" I stood up from the table and reached out my hand towards her. She latched on and held tight as I led us down to the car. In the car, I clicked my belt on before reaching for her hand and holding it against my leg. I wanted more of a physical connection with her tonight. Out of the corner of my eye I saw her move to situate her body so that she was facing me.

"I should have told you about my decision about bounty hunting earlier. I talked about it with Dr. Lewis the last couple of weeks. I don't think I can do it again. I'm too afraid of taking the chance of getting hurt again. I mean, I can barely let my friends touch me in a kind manner let alone a skip getting rough with me." She squeezed my hand as she talked. "Are you disappointed in me for giving up?"

"No. I want you to do whatever makes you happy and safe." I lifted her hand and gave it a kiss. The gesture somehow more intimate than even the kiss we'd shared earlier today, but it didn't make her tense up. The simple gesture held such promise for me of something more developing between us and I couldn't help but grin.

Pulling the rig into my garage, I turned to look at her. She looked so tired, but at the same time her face was brighter and lighter than it had been recently. I liked knowing that some of that might have to do with me and the emotions we were sharing. "Let's leave the boxes in the back. I'll get them in the morning unless there's something you need tonight."

She shook her head. "That's fine."

I watched her move through the garage and into the kitchen, amazed at how natural it all seemed between us. Having her in this house made it feel like home and somehow made everything in my life better. In the kitchen she set about making tea and set out plates for us. She was ready to eat her extra dessert now. Her appetite was still a little smaller than it was before the rape, but she was getting it back gradually.

Sitting at the table we drank our tea and ate cake, talking about our schedule for the week. I had to do a redecorating job with Lester and Ram on Tuesday night meaning someone else would need to be here with her. I knew she wasn't ready to be alone in the dark yet. I hated leaving her but knew that some normalcy to our routines as well as time apart was good for us both. She nodded knowing that Hector would most likely volunteer. I would take her to her counseling appointment tomorrow of course, but I knew that we each had work to do at the office this week too.

"Go out with me on Friday? I'd like to take you out on a nice date, get all dressed up for you." I looked at her over my cup. I didn't want to push or rush, but I also wanted to make my intentions clear and they were to romance this woman and make her mine.

She blushed, but smiled. "I'd love to."

Her answer made me giddy like a school boy, but I wasn't embarrassed by that reaction. This was the woman I wanted to have by my side and the idea that she was tickled by that as well filled my heart with joy. "It's a date then."

Steph was already stretched out in bed when I got there. She had practically fallen asleep in the 15 minutes it took for me to get ready. The activity and emotion of the day had undoubtedly worn her out.

I slipped in next to her glad to feel her tiny body snuggle up to mine automatically. I kissed her head and slipped my arm around her waist. She sighed into my embrace causing me to do the same, content in the simplicity of just being near her.

"I'm so glad you're in my life." Her tired whisper filled the room and caused me to smile wide.

"The feeling is mutual Little Girl. You are the light of my life and I'll prove it to you for as long as you let me. Sweet dreams, I'll be right here if you need me." I kissed her shoulder and rested my head on the pillow.

"I'll always need you Pierre." My arms tightened around her at the sound of my name on her lips. It was such a simple thing, but one that touched me so deeply. I had never wanted anyone, especially a woman, to call me by given name, but when she did it I felt a surge of pride and possession fill me. I hoped she would always call me Pierre in quiet whispers when it was just the two of us.


	12. Chapter 12

_Much thanks to my Beta, Cristi0819, for her wise words, continued patience, and general awesomeness._

_**Chapter 12 - Steph's POV**_

Standing in front of the mirror, I smoothed out my dress. Tank was already downstairs waiting on me. We had agreed to get ready in separate rooms so that we could see each other in a more traditional date fashion.

Our week had been an interesting mix of work and quiet evenings spent getting to know each other. I had been staying with Tank for a month and a half, but during most of that time Tank had been taking care of me. A shift had occurred this week allowing us to connect on a deeper level and it had been amazing.

After work we would eat a leisurely meal and then talk on the couch for hours. We didn't talk about the rape or work, but about each other, getting to know the little things like favorite ice cream sundae flavors - butterscotch for him, hot fudge for me. There were some talks about dreams for the future, but mostly discussions were light and while simple it allowed me to see how very much we had in common.

True to his word, Tank didn't rush or push me in any way. We shared a few kisses throughout the week, but nothing overly passionate. I was still so nervous about physical contact. While I was used to and craved Tank's supportive and secure touch, I was still fearful of physical intimacy. Emotionally, we were much more intimate and I felt so very close to him, closer than I thought possible.

I slipped into my heels and gave myself one last look over before grabbing my purse and opening the door. Walking down the steps, I saw Tank waiting for me at the bottom. He was in a charcoal grey suit with a crisp white shirt and red paisley tie. I took his extended hand as I reached the bottom and couldn't help but giggle a bit in excitement. "You look amazing, so very handsome."

He smiled and kissed my forehead. "Stephanie, you take my breath away. You're gorgeous."

My cheeks got warm at his compliment causing him to shake his head. "Nothing to be embarrassed about, you are an incredible woman, Little Girl. Ready?" He crooked his elbow at me and I slipped my hand around it, allowing him to lead us to the garage.

"I made reservations for a new place at the edge of town, Capers. I hope that's okay." He looked at me as he pulled into the street.

I smiled and laced my fingers with his on the center console. "I haven't heard much about it, but you know me. I like to eat."

He chuckled. "I just wanted us to go somewhere different. Somewhere without history." His eyes stayed on the road as he drove, but I understood what he was saying. He was giving us a first date in a place that would be special to only us. I was surprised and touched by such a romantic notion from the big guy.

We made the drive in a companionable silence. I found myself watching our joined hands most of the time. His hand was large and dark in contrast to mine but the way he held it was secure without making me feel trapped. Every once in a while his thumb would rub over mine absentmindedly, but still the connection felt almost electric.

I struggled with how we could feel so deeply connected and yet not have had a physical relationship. All of my past relationships seemed to begin with the physical connection, but were extremely lacking in the emotional aspect. It was the complete opposite with Tank. While I knew he was taking it slowly because of all I'd been through recently, it also seemed to be genuine on his part. He behaved as if this was supremely important to him, like he was interested in creating something lasting between us rather than something that fizzled fast. It made me wonder again what I had done to deserve someone as wonderful as him in my life.

At the restaurant, a valet opened the door for me. I took his offered hand as I stepped out of Tank's SUV, shocking both myself and Tank. It was the first time I had allowed a stranger to touch me. Tank smiled as he stepped beside me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "You're amazing."

Leaning my head into his shoulder, I couldn't help but smile wide. It was a simple thing and yes I knew Tank was right there so nothing could happen to me, but still it seemed like I'd made a giant step in my recovery. Tank's arm squeezed me to him before holding the door open for me.

We were shown to a table in the corner and listened to the waiter recite the night's specials before Tank ordered a bottle of wine. The waiter left us alone to look over the menu, but I found I couldn't think about the food. I just wanted to keep my eyes on the handsome man across the table from me. He was a giant of a man and while he could easily be the most intimidating person I've ever known, he was also the gentlest.

Lifting his head from his menu, his deep brown eyes met mine. "Everything okay?"

I nodded and gave him a smile, my hand resting on the table. "I was just admiring the view."

He squeezed my hand in his and chuckled. "Anything look good?"

"Everything, but I haven't really looked at the menu yet." The flirtation left my mouth before I could censor it and I felt myself blush.

Tank gave me another one of his gorgeous smiles that crinkled up his eyes as he leaned forward to whisper. "You do look quite delectable too, but let's eat first."

His words helped me to focus. No matter how much I thought about him, thought about being with him physically, I wasn't going to be able to follow-through on that right now. I looked over the menu and had a few choices in mind when the waiter reappeared with our wine. After Tank approved and the wine was poured we ordered dinner. Tank ordered a steak and I ordered the pasta special, something with four cheeses.

We talked quietly about nothing as we waited for our food. I found the distance of the table to be too far. I wanted to be closer to him, wanted to feel his solid body against mine but knew that this was technically a first date and that I should try to behave accordingly. He was so calm and confident across from me, but I noticed that he paid attention to everything happening in the room around us. He couldn't shut that part of his brain off no matter how relaxed he might be, he was always cataloguing possible threats.

Our food was served and as I bit into my pasta I couldn't help the moan that escaped my lips. Tank's chuckle forced me to look up from my plate at him. "So glad to hear you moaning in delight over your food again." His face was so sincere that I couldn't help but feel like something else magical was happening in my recovery.

I watched him eat for a few minutes, enjoying my own food when I had questions for him. "Tell me about your family. We've talked about so much in the last few weeks but never about your parents. You've met mine so you know I won't judge." I tried to give him a wink, but don't think I pulled it off really well.

He finished chewing his food and looked at me. His eyes saddened for a second and I regretted bringing up something that made the sparkle there disappear. "My mom died when I was just a toddler. My dad worked or drank all the time so I spent most of my time with my grandma. She died while I was in boot camp. You two would have gotten along so well."

"I'm sorry if I brought up some sad memories." I let my fingers caress his hand on the table.

"It's fine." He said with a shake of his head. "I don't have anything to hide from you, Steph."

"Where's your dad now?" I watched his face run through hurt and anger, as I took a bite of my dinner.

"He's in jail in Pennsylvania for killing another man while driving drunk." His fingers tightened on his fork as the memory ran through him.

How such a good, decent man like Tank could come from that kind of childhood and father figure surprised me. "Thank you for sharing such painful memories with me." I didn't know what else to say or how to ease his obvious heartache, but I did like the glimpse into the things that formed him into the amazing man before me.

We finished our meal with much lighter conversation, our hands gravitating towards one another at every opportunity. After the waiter cleared our plates, Tank shook my hand and met my eyes. "I wanted to take you somewhere else for dessert. Is that okay?"

I nodded as he handed over his credit card to the waiter. Standing to leave, Tank wrapped his arm around my shoulder allowing me to slip my arm around his waist. I wasn't surprised to know that he was carrying, but I still let my hand feel the holster at his waist as I relaxed into his side.

He chuckled and leaned down to whisper into my ear while the valet got his car. "You didn't think I'd take you anywhere without a way to protect us, did you?"

"Of course not. How many?" While it didn't really matter to me, I was enjoying the playful banter and wanted to keep it going.

"Two, ankle as well." He answered honestly, as his car was pulled to the curb. He tipped the valet before taking me by the hand and helping me into the passenger seat. I was surprised when he leaned in and put my safety belt on as well.

I allowed my fingers to caress his rugged jaw as he clicked it into place. His eyes watched me, our faces just inches from one another. "I'm having a great time, Pierre. Thank you." I bit my lip as the tension built between us. I had been calling him Pierre more often when it was just the two of us and I could tell that he liked hearing it from me.

He leaned forward slowly, his eyes watching me for any resistance. When I nodded he understood that I was giving him permission and he took my face in his hands and kissed me, our lips locking for a deeply intimate kiss. He pulled back after a few seconds, a smile gracing his full lips. "We should get out of the parking lot."

I giggled a little and nodded my head. When he climbed behind the wheel, my body instantly gravitated so that I could face him and our hands could join. He drove us to Dairy Queen and ordered a butterscotch and a hot fudge sundae, making me smile at his dessert plans. He handed me the bag as he pulled out of the drive through. "Hold onto those, we're going somewhere special to eat them."

"Okay." I bit my lip, excited to figure out his plans.

He pulled us into a parking lot of a small park. I was surprised when he turned the car off and got out. Opening my door he looked at me, his eyebrow furrowing a bit. I was nervous and he obviously picked up on it. "Trust me?"

I was instantly ashamed of myself for feeling nervous about being in the park in the dark. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that he would always take care of me. "Of course, I do." Taking his hand, I climbed down with our bag of sundaes in my other hand. He grabbed a blanket from the back seat and led me down a raised boardwalk to a small lighted fountain.

After spreading out the blanket, he sat down and tugged on my hand to sit between his legs. I rested my back on his front as we dug into our ice cream. It was perfectly simple in every way. He wasn't flashy but at the same time his thoughtfulness was always so very touching.

When he finished his ice cream, he wrapped his hands around my waist and held me tighter to him. I put my empty dish in the bag with his and reached above me to wrap my hands around his neck. I looked up at him and kissed his chin.

We sat for a long time just listening to the fountain water splash as the lights twinkled in the dark. I felt so content in his arms, but this nagging thought and fear of physical intimacy got the best of me and my mouth spoke before my mind could stop it. "What if you get tired of waiting for me? What if I can't provide for your needs?"

I knew he was being patient with me, but what if I couldn't have sex? What if I couldn't get over that feeling of Mathis pushing himself inside of me? I couldn't truly expect him to live a celibate life because of my baggage. The idea of Tank moving on from what we were starting caused my heart to ache, but at the same time I didn't want to hold him back from any happiness.

Tank placed a kiss to the top of my head and released his hold on me. "Turn around, please. I want to look at you while we talk about this, I want you to see the truth in my eyes."

Turning I faced him, but found it hard to look in his eyes, afraid of what he might say. He tilted my chin up with his fingers and kissed my nose. Holding my hands between our laps he let out a deep breath. "Stephanie, I told you I'm not in any kind of rush and I'm not going anywhere. I meant that. You already provide for my needs. I understand you're worried about sex, but I'm not. One day at a time."

I could see the sincerity in his eyes, could feel the truth in his grip of my hands, but my mind still couldn't quite grasp it. "What if I never get there? What if I never recover?" My eyes were dangerously close to shedding tears and I absolutely didn't want to do that tonight, so I did my best to stave them off.

Tank leaned forward and kissed my lips, pulling me so that I was sitting on his lap. The kiss took my breath away. It was passionate, but it was also one of devotion and full of love like I'd never known. He broke the kiss, his hands caressing my cheeks. "I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me to, Little Girl. You'll recover, you are already recovering. I'm not worried about my needs and I don't want you to be either. Okay?"

I nodded and relaxed, wrapping my arms around his waist. He held me close to him, his arms rubbing my back as I zoned out against him. This amazing man who had so much to offer a woman was willing to wait for me and I was going to do my best to quit fighting it, to quit finding reasons for him to want to push me away.

Kissing just below his ear lobe, I sighed into his embrace further. I knew it was early in this exploration of our feelings for each other, but I knew without hesitation that I loved this man who was holding me in his arms. For the first time in my life that thought didn't scare me and I needed to tell him and hope that what I was feeling in his kiss was indeed true, that he loved me too.

I sat back, my hands on his neck and looked in his eyes. I let out a deep breath and kissed his lips gently before sitting back again. He watched me obviously trying to gauge what was going on inside my curly head. "I love you, Pierre." My teeth captured my bottom lip as I watched and waited for his response.

His eyes widened before his lips cracked that wide smile crinkling up the corners of his eyes. "My God, Stephanie, I love you, have for so long now." His fingers wrapped around my neck as he pulled me into his lips. His other hand flattened against my back and held me tight to him as my lips melted into his.

He opened his lips just slightly, his tongue tracing my lips tentatively. I knew he was testing the waters, giving me every chance to back out, but I didn't want to stop, I wanted to take this connection deeper. Opening my mouth, I gave him entrance, surprised at how gentle and yet forcefully he swept inside. His tongue was magic against mine, he tasted sweet like his butterscotch sundae, but at the same time the action was masculine and safe, filling me with a love and sense of safety that I didn't believe possible until this moment.

We kissed for what seemed like hours until other voices in the park reminded us of where we were. He laughed and tilted his head back towards the car. "Ready to go home?" Home sounded wonderful and home with him seemed like a fairytale come true. I exhaled and stood from his lap grabbing our garbage and tossing it into a can as he rolled up our blanket.

As we headed back to the house, our hands still entwined, I found a new level of determination in my healing process. It might take time, but I wanted to make sure I could offer every part of myself to this amazing man. I wanted every part of him and wanted to make sure he could love every bit of my body, heart, and soul.


	13. Chapter 13

_Continued thanks to my amazing beta, Cristi0819. You rock!_

_**Chapter 13 - Tank's POV**_

I was sitting in Dr. Lewis' waiting room trying to answer e-mails on my damn phone. My hands were too big to text on this small screen, but it at least let me catch up on the office happenings while staying close to Steph.

This chair had been my home for the last two months, every Monday morning. At first I sat so close to the door because I wanted to be ready at a moment's notice if she changed her mind and needed to leave. She never cut a session short, but sitting here let me see her face the minute she left the counselor's office. It gave me some inkling of how she was feeling, it let me know if she'd been in tears or was relieved from her time with Dr. Lewis.

We were growing closer. The last few weeks since our first date had allowed us to relax into our feelings for one another. Knowing that she loved me gave me the permission I needed to relax more and worry less about adding to any stress she might be feeling. She told her parents last night that she was going to live with me. They had already figured out that we were dating. It was fast. We both knew it, but living together just felt right and there was no way either one of us could imagine living separately now.

Steph went out on her by herself for the first time last week. I admit to being more nervous than she was at the time. She had her panic button and I knew rationally she was going to be safe, but I worried that she would have some kind of anxiety attack and need help. At the time I toyed with having someone shadow her, but in the end decided that it was unfair to her and that I needed to trust her to tell me what she needed. She went to the mall and had a great time. She admitted later that she had a hard time walking alone to her car in the parking garage, but she managed by keeping her fingers on the panic button in her pocket. I was incredibly proud of her for pushing her way through her fear and was so glad to welcome her back into my arms when she got home.

The door opened and I watched Steph's face hoping for any clue about how she was doing by her expression. She smiled as I stood up and held out my hand for her, latching on and letting me lead her to the car outside.

I helped her into the seat and kissed her forehead before searching her eyes. I never pushed about what they talked about, but I liked to make sure she was okay. Today I could see lightness behind her eyes and I knew that she was moving past the trauma of what had been done to her. She smiled and kissed my chin, her fingers resting on my chest, she opened her mouth to say something at the exact time her stomach announced its need for food.

Chuckling, I shut her door and climbed behind the wheel. "I'm sure the guys are waiting for us at Shorty's." It had become a tradition about a month ago. Hector, Lester, and Bobby met us for lunch after each counseling appointment. It was their way of checking in on her without crowding or bombarding her with questions.

Lester was sharing a story about a skip he and Ram had picked up this morning when I felt Steph slide closer to me. Her hand gripped my knee and I could feel tension radiating from her. It was such a dramatic shift in the lightness from just a second ago that I reached for my gun. Something had her on edge and I wanted to be ready. I looked at her quickly noticing that her eyes were frightened as I tried to scan the restaurant to see what had spooked her.

My eyes landed on the fire chief and Damien Robbins walking around the restaurant with clipboards, no doubt doing code enforcement checks. This was the chance we took by letting him live, the opportunity for unexpected encounters. Morelli had told me last week that Robbins was drinking and babbling a little too much in his drunken state about hurting Steph. I knew we were going to have to deal with him, but seeing him here now let me know that I needed to speed up my timeline.

Slipping my arm around Steph's shoulder, I pulled her closer to me and kissed her head. I felt it the moment the rest of the guys noticed Robbins. The air around us was charged. Robbins hadn't driven his own car and we pulled back on the surveillance on him so there was no way anyone could have warned us that he was so near to Steph.

"I will not let him get near you, Little Girl." I whispered into her ear, trying hard to keep the anger from seeping into my voice. Her hand was shaking in my lap causing my muscles to tense up with rage.

Steph's eyes were full of fear as she searched my face. She let out a deep breath, leaned forward and whispered in my ear, "Pierre, can we leave please? I know you'll keep me safe but I just need to get out of here."

"Sure, Steph." I made eye contact with the guys and they all understood without words.

Bobby tossed some money on the table to cover our bill as the guys stood and surrounded Steph. We had fallen into standard bodyguard protocol, circling our large bodies around her tiny frame. Steph's entire body was shivering by the time we got outside.

I helped her into the passenger seat of my SUV, caressing her cheek. "Do you want me to take you home?"

She shook her head. "I want to go to work. I don't want to see him but I'm not giving him power to ruin my day either."

My thumbs rubbed her cheeks as I searched her eyes and watched the fear be replaced with determination. "You're amazing, Stephanie."

Steph's eyes sparkled at my compliment and she gave me a wide smile. I leaned forward and kissed her lips as her fingers curled around my wrist. Pulling back from the kiss, I couldn't control the smile on my face no matter how hard I tried. I forced myself to let her go and close the door so that I could get us back to RangeMan.

After I walked Steph to her cubicle, I went to my office and closed the door. Despite Steph's quick recovery, I was pissed that the encounter happened. I should have killed Robbins when I had the chance. Now, I couldn't do it because there was no way of not implicating RangeMan in some way.

My fingers were clenching and unclenching as I paced around my office. I wanted to hit something and was thinking about heading down to the gym when a knock at the door forced me to pull on my blank face. "Enter!"

Hector appeared at the door and closed it behind him. His eyes were full of rage. His entire body radiated such fierce energy that I had no doubt everyone in the office would be keeping their distance from him. "I'll kill him. She should never have to see him again. I don't want a chance encounter to happen when she's without us sometime."

His words forced a growl from my throat. I didn't like the idea of her running into him alone either. I believed we had scared him enough that he wouldn't bother her and while her anxiety was so much better overall, an encounter with him obviously frightened her. The idea of her being alone and dealing with that fear was almost too much for my heart to take.

I shook my head. "I want to kill him but we can't do it cleanly, especially since he's been babbling about Steph around town. We can, however, have another chat with him." Hector grinned at the thought and I found my own cheeks smirking at the idea of punching him again.

"Just let me know when and where. There's nothing I won't do for my Chica." Hector nodded and left at that.

The afternoon was spent with normal workday routines broken up by moments of planning to get to Robbins. Lester, Hector, Bobby, and I had agreed to find Robbins in his house tonight for a late night chat. We weren't going to hurt him too bad, just remind him to cross the street and turn around if he ran into Steph accidently.

My mind wandered to Steph often throughout the day. It was hard not to pull up the feed to check on her or walk to her desk, but I knew I needed to not crowd her. She was recovering and doing so well and I needed to let her ask for whatever she needed on her own.

At 1700 I couldn't resist it any more. I turned off my computer and went to get her to go home. I watched her working as I walked down the hall to her desk. She lifted her head when I was just a few feet away, her entire face lighting up. Turning her computer off, she stood up and met my eyes.

Wrapping my arm around her shoulder, we walked to the elevator together. The guys had gotten used to us together. Plenty of them had words with me about my care of her, but overall everyone seemed to be happy for us. As long as Steph was happy, they were happy. I knew that they weren't concerned about my happiness, but hers was the most important thing in this building. Despite the fact that I knew every soldier in this building was watching me closely, I liked knowing how very protected and cared for my Little Girl would be for the rest of her life.

We stopped for Chinese take-out on the way home and ate our dinner quietly at the table. I had plans to meet up with the guys in a few hours. I hadn't left her at home alone since the rape and I suddenly worried that it was wrong to do so now.

Letting out a deep breath, I looked in her beautiful blue eyes. "Little Girl, I need to go out for a while tonight. Do you want to stay here? I can call one of the guys to come stay with you or I could drop you off at Mary Lou's or Lula's." I was rambling, but I wanted her to know that I would do anything she needed to feel safe.

She smiled at me but put her fork down and starting rubbing her hands together. She wasn't wringing them, but it was still her poker tell that she was anxious. "I want to stay here by myself. I should try to be alone and I can set the alarm. I know I'm safe here."

Reaching across the table, I took her hand in mine and gave it a gentle squeeze. "You are safe here." I was so proud and inspired by her continued determination.

"You can't kill him." Her statement surprised me and made me quirk an eyebrow at her. "I have no doubt that you are all angry about seeing Damien today, but he was just going about his business. He hasn't threatened me or even come anywhere near me, you can't kill him."

As usual, her instincts were dead on. She could read us all so well, despite the blank faces we tried to pull often around her. "We're not going to kill him." I left it at that and she seemed to accept it as she stood up to toss out the take-out containers.

Lester was coming to get me at 2300 hours, so we had plenty of time to relax on the couch together. Part of me hoped the late hour would mean that she would simply sleep and feel relaxed. She hadn't had a nightmare in some time, so I hoping she could rest peacefully while I was out.

We were watching some TV, her head resting in my lap when she turned over so that she could look up at me. There was a thought brewing behind her eyes that I couldn't quite read. My fingers ran along her hairline waiting her out, letting her speak when she was ready.

She sat up and straddled my legs, her hands resting on my neck. Her teeth pulled her bottom lip into her mouth as her eyes searched mine. "I love you, Pierre." We didn't use the words often, neither one of us were very comfortable with talking about our feelings, but I thought we did a very good job of showing each other our love.

Cupping her cheek in my hand, I smiled. "I love you too, Steph."

Our eyes held each other's for a few moments before she leaned forward to kiss me. I tried not to be too aggressive with her but sometimes the force of how I felt just couldn't be tamed. My hands roamed her back, landing in her hair, I gripped a handful hoping that the force of my hold wouldn't scare her. She didn't resist, but rather allowed me to slip my tongue into her mouth and returning the kiss with passion of her own.

When she moaned and slid her hands down my chest I felt myself start to lose control. I wanted her so badly, but was letting her lead the way physically. I'd taken plenty of cold showers in the last few weeks and would be willing to keep doing that until she was ready. There was no way I would let her confuse my love for her with the nightmare of what had been taken from her.

She withdrew from the kiss only to pepper my cheeks with tiny kisses that were sweet and full of passion at the same time. When she moved to kiss and suck my earlobe I couldn't control the reaction of my body and knew that she had to feel me hardening beneath her. Still she didn't stop or tense up, causing me to pull her tighter to my chest.

I felt her take a deep breath and kiss my ear lobe as her hands wrapped around my back. "What if we start and I can't continue? I mean, what if I need to stop or I freak out? I know you're not him, that you'd never force yourself on me, but will you hate me for teasing you? I don't want to disappoint you or make you mad."

"Shh, Steph." She was rambling and I felt the need to get her to stop talking so I could just reassure her. "If we start something and you need to stop, you just tell me. I could never hate you and would never get mad or disappointed in you for telling me that you don't want to have sex. I'm following your lead, okay?"

I felt her nod against my neck just before she kissed it. "I want you and I know you want me. I'm trying to get there. Sometimes I just have a hard time thinking about sex without associating it with violence. I know you wouldn't be violent with me, it's just..." She let out a deep breath against my ear. "It's just that he destroyed the experience a little, ruined me a little too."

Those words would be fuel for my talk with Robbins later. I moved so that I could hold her head in my hands and look in her eyes. "Stephanie, you are not ruined, you are amazing. Sex is understandably a hard thing for you to wrap your mind around right now. I'm not in a hurry and when you're ready we'll try and I promise I'll be gentle. I'll make love to you but if at any point you need to stop, I'll listen to you and do what you need."

Her shoulders dropped as she relaxed and believed my words. I meant every word, of course. When it was time I would be as gentle and reassuring with her body as I was trying to be with her soul at the moment. We relaxed back on the couch, her fears settled for the time being.

Lester showed up at 2300 hours, but Steph was still awake. She assured me that she would wait up for me as she kissed me goodbye. The thought of her waiting at home for me spurred a little something in my heart, but I also hoped that she would be relaxed tonight and not afraid.

Lester drove us to Robbins' house letting me know that the guys on duty had confirmed that Robbins was home alone. His knuckles were white with the force of his grip on the wheel. "I wanted to shoot him right in the middle of Shorty's today. I understand why we can't kill him, but that doesn't make the desire any less."

I understood exactly what he meant and I felt exactly the same way. As we drove, I wondered if we should have had someone else come along with us, someone who would've been able to help us control our rage. The four of us were only more likely to help hide the body rather than stop the murder.

Bobby and Hector were already hiding out in the alley when Lester and I approached. There was no need for words as we silently made our way through Robbins' yard. Hector had the back door lock picked in a matter of seconds, allowing us to sneak in. We found Robbins asleep on his couch, the TV still on and empty beer bottles strewn on the coffee table.

We surrounded his sleeping body and Lester clapped his hands loudly. Robbins sat up with a start at the noise. His face registered shock and total fear as he recognized us standing around him. "I, I haven't done anything." He stuttered out at me. I was glad to know our last lesson had left such an impression on him.

I leaned down to get to his eye level, my hand gripping painfully on his shoulder. "We're just here to make sure you stay on your best behavior."

"I didn't know you were all in Shorty's. I was just doing my job." He was trying to cover for himself, trying to protect himself from our fury.

"From now on, if you see her I want you to find a way to turn around and walk away. I also want you to stop talking about hurting her. You should never find a reason to say her name to anyone, ever. Understand me?" The guys growled around me, their bodies radiating such fury that I was surprised I couldn't see it undulating around us.

Robbins swallowed and nodded. He was sufficiently scared, but Steph's words about being ruined came back to me and I couldn't help but punch him in the gut. I didn't want to leave any bruises on his face but I needed to hurt him, make someone pay for her tears and self-doubt.

Bobby made a small move bringing my focus back. I knew we couldn't beat Robbins tonight, knew that I had to keep some control in my body but it wasn't easy. "Don't make us come back." I shoved him into the back of his couch, the rest of the guys slapping his back and shoulders before we stomped our way out of his house.

We'd been gone less than an hour, but I found myself anxious to get home and back to my woman. Robbins hadn't truly done anything to threaten her lately, but I still hoped that my threats to him tonight would keep her safe from him and from any rumors he might try to spread the next time he was drunk in a bar.


	14. Chapter 14

_Thanks so much to my incredible Beta, Cristi0819. She's been so supportive on so many different levels and I just can't exalt her greatness enough._

_I googled the hospital and other info for Philadelphia, please forgive me if I gotten it wrong..._

_**Chapter 14 - Steph's POV**_

Tank had been called to the police station to help deal with a takedown gone wrong leaving me alone in our house on Saturday morning. I was tempted to hit the mall, but figured he might need a friendly face and some fun when he got home so I stayed in the house doing some laundry. Tank's house had become our home and when he was home it was my refuge from the world. I think it was a refuge for him, too. We were both so very content inside these walls together.

The landline rang as I was pulling clothes out of the dryer. It hardly ever rang, most people called either of our cells. I answered it expecting it to be a telemarketer and not at all surprised when the woman on the other end asked for Tank. My mother and grandmother were the only folks that called the land line for me.

"This is Nurse Davies from the Curran-Fromhold Correctional Facility in Philadelphia." The voice explained when I asked if I could take a message. "Mr. Sherman's father was injured in a prison fight. He's in stable condition at Nazereth Hospital, but would like to see his son and is allowed visitors during normal hospital hours."

I got the room information from the nurse, telling her we'd be there later today. Throwing together an overnight bag for us, I wondered if I was overstepping my bounds. I didn't know if Tank would want to go, but I figured no matter what had happened in their past he would want to see his dad even if just for a few minutes.

"Little Girl?" His voice greeted me as he entered the house. Running down the steps, I tried to take in his face to see how the morning went. He gave me a broad smile and I knew that while the morning may have been a hassle, nothing tremendously wrong had happened.

Giving him a tight hug, I kissed his lips before stepping back and meeting his eyes. "Your father was injured in a prison fight." Tank's blank face fell into place, forcing me to fight my own inclination to frown. "He's okay, but he's in the hospital and he would like to see you. I've packed us a bag. We could leave now if you want."

"I don't know, Steph." He ran his hand over his face and head before settling it at the back of his neck. "I can go, but you don't have to."

Reaching up to touch his face, I gave him a smile. "I know I don't have to, but I want to. Please give me the chance to support and love you as much as you have me." He was fiercely protective and on some level I knew that his reluctance to have me along was about that, wanting to protect me from his father and any anxiety that might come with taking a trip like this. Still, my anxiety level had gone down and I was dealing better with overwhelming situations. I knew I could handle this with him by my side and I wanted to be there for him more than anything else in the world at the moment.

He obviously saw the sincerity and determination in my eyes, because he nodded then. "Alright, let me switch out some weapons and grab some identification for the hospital and prison guards to let me keep my guns on." I chuckled at that, thinking that his travel preparations were so very different than my typical mascara check.

Tank called Bobby and Lester letting them know he'd be offline until Monday morning and they wished us safe travels. While he called the guys, I made hotel reservations for us just down the street from the hospital. An hour later we were on the road.

Arriving in Philadelphia, we checked into the hotel and dropped our bags in the room. We used the bathroom and washed the road grime from our hands and faces before heading to the hospital. Walking the few blocks to the hospital, I kept my hand firmly latched onto Tank's. He was unusually somber. I was used to a quiet Tank, but the somber aura was new and I found myself wanting to do something to ease his mind.

We reached the large hospital in only a few minutes. Finding the elevator, we entered and allowed the doors to close taking us to the seventh floor. I took the opportunity to slide my arm around his waist and get close to his large body. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and kissed the top of my head before whispering, "Thanks, Steph. I'm glad you're with me."

I looked up at his rugged face and gave him what I hoped was a reassuring smile. "There's nowhere else I want to be than with you."

The doors opened and I let him lead me towards his dad's room. There were prison guards stationed outside that Tank approached. Tank gave them his military ID and presented them with some paperwork that allowed him to carry his gun into the room. The guards looked it over and then at me.

"She's not carrying." Tank answered their obviously silently communicated question.

The guards nodded and let us pass. Tank pushed open the door, allowing me the first glance at his dad. Even lying down I could tell that Tank got his height from his father. His dad wasn't as large or in as good of shape as Tank, but the family resemblance was obvious. The man in the bed opened his eyes slowly, trying to take in who had come in, his lips tilted up into a slight grin as he noticed Tank.

"Pierre, thank you for coming." His voice was deep like Tank's but more husky, like a smoker's.

"Dad, this is Stephanie Plum." Tank introduced me but didn't let go of my hand when his dad lifted a hand to shake mine. I squeezed Tank's hand and he let me go. "Steph, this is my dad, Henry."

Shaking his hand, I gave him a smile. "Nice to meet you. How are you feeling?"

His shake was gentle and tentative but he chuckled a bit at my question. "Like I've been stabbed."

I didn't know what to say to that so I simply smiled. Tank came up next to me and pulled out a chair for me to sit. He stood next to me, his hand resting on my shoulder as he looked over his dad. The tension between them was thick and while I wanted to support Tank, I wondered if I should leave them alone.

Squeezing Tank's hand, I stood up. "I could use a coke." And a Tastycake I thought, but didn't feel like admitting that. "I'm going to search for the cafeteria. Do you want anything?" I looked at Tank and his dad hoping that I could have an excuse to leave them alone for a bit.

"Steph, they won't let you bring anything in here that isn't directly from a nurse or orderly." Tank gave me a smile as he reminded me that his dad was still an inmate not a free man.

"Oh, of course." I could feel my cheeks blushing at my naiveté.

"Go ahead and get yourself something." His hand rubbed up and down my arm. "I'll be here."

Nodding, I gave him a smile and let my hand pat my pocket. The panic button was there and while I knew I was safe in the hospital, it was a comfort to me to have it there. Tank gave me a smile obviously picking up on the motion and glad that I had it with me too. He kissed my forehead before letting me leave.

Finding my way to the cafeteria, I picked up a coke and a piece of pie. Sugar would help me navigate the tension between Tank and his dad, I hoped. It certainly wouldn't hurt the situation any. Sitting at a table in the corner, I ate my snack and watched the people milling around. I'd come a long way in the last few months. The fact that I had left Tank's side in a strange place was a testament to just how much I had moved on from the attack.

I was still nervous, would still not walk alone on a city street, but I was improving slowly and steadily. Dr. Lewis said it was natural for some things to likely be changed in me permanently, but that I would still be able to function and live normally. Some days I didn't feel normal but it did seem like that with each passing week, I took steps at reclaiming what had been taken from me.

Twenty minutes later, I approached Henry's hospital room. The guards let me pass with a small nod. Tank and his dad were talking and while they weren't exactly at ease, they were at least communicating. They both smiled at me as I entered. Henry's eyes were obviously drooping and tired as he lay in bed.

Tank stood up from the chair and put his arm around my shoulder. "Get some rest. We'll stop by in the morning before we head back to Trenton." Henry nodded and I shook his hand again before following Tank out.

We walked back to the hotel in silence. In the room, Tank kicked off his shoes before taking off his weapons, placing one gun on the nightstand and the other gun and knife in a drawer. He sat down in an easy chair and rubbed his face before giving me a small smile. "I'm glad I came and even happier that you came with me."

Sitting myself down on his lap, I threw my arms around his neck letting my legs dangle over the arm of the chair. "Thank you for introducing me to your dad." His arms tightened around me as I placed little kisses on his jawline.

Our lips met for a small kiss but his grip around me tightened just before he opened his mouth letting my tongue taste him. He moaned and I felt a sense of urgency and passion build between us. We still hadn't gotten very far physically, but I had been talking about it at great length with Dr. Lewis and knew that I could do it now, at least in stages.

Tank's arousal from my attentions was obvious under my lap. I'd felt him harden more than once and was always impressed with his ability to control that desire. Dr. Lewis had suggested that I try getting comfortable with oral sex first, as that hadn't happened during the rape and it would allow me to reclaim my sexuality in stages while also getting comfortable with the male anatomy again.

I tugged at Tank's shirt wanting to remove it, wanting to get closer to his skin. He put his hand over mine. "Steph?" He was questioning my desire, making sure I was okay with this.

My mouth was running dry from the desire, but I found the motivation to speak. "Please, I want more."

He nodded and removed his shirt, tossing it onto the floor. I'd seen his bare chest numerous times, but it never ceased to leave me in awe. His dark skin was ridged with muscles, a few scars dotting the otherwise perfect male specimen in front of me. Leaning forward I took one of his nipples into my mouth, nipping it lightly before letting my tongue swirl around it.

I felt and heard him moan from my attentions and couldn't help but smile as I moved my hand across the ridges of his abs. His hands slid up underneath my shirt, slowly, letting me know that he was watching me for any tension or resistance. Sitting up I smiled at him and grasped the hem of my shirt to toss it onto the floor.

His fingers caressed my neck and trailed down before tracing along the edge of my bra. He reached around and grasped the hooks in his hands as his eyes searched mine. I nodded, giving him the permission he needed to remove my bra. Sliding it down my arms gently, he smiled. "You are so very beautiful."

Tossing the bra onto the floor, his hands came back to my waist. I continued licking and sucking on his ear lobe and neck as his hands explored my bare torso. When his fingers touched my breast I tensed for just a second, but it didn't escape him. "I won't hurt you, Little Girl."

Letting out a deep breath, I sat back again and cupped his cheeks in my hand. "I know." I kept my eyes on him as his hands found my breasts again, his fingers lightly rolling my nipples. My body reacted to the pleasure and to the knowledge that he loved me.

He was pulsing underneath me and I knew he had to be uncomfortable in his pants. Pulling myself out of his embrace, I stood before him. My hands shook from excitement as much as nervousness as I took my jeans and panties off. He watched me undress, his eyes hooded with desire, licking his lips as he took me in. "So sexy."

He made a move to stand up but I shook my head. "You have on far to too many clothes." Keeping his seat, he unbuttoned his pants. Putting my hands on his waist band, I tugged and he took the hint, lifting his hips for me to remove them.

My eyes raked his naked body in the chair and I felt myself gush with arousal. He was gorgeous and strong, his arousal long and hard jutting from his lap. "I love you, Pierre."

He growled at my words and reached for me but I stepped back. My retreat caused his eyebrows to furrow and I knew he was worried that it was too soon. I knelt in front of him, my hands resting on his knees. Kissing each of his thighs, I felt his body relax into my affections.

Wrapping my hand around his cock, I pumped slowly trying to get accustomed to the weight of him. A moan escaped his chest as he leaned back in the chair. I noticed his hands grip the arms of the chair as I leaned forward to lick up his shaft.

Taking as much of him as I could into my mouth, I found that my body remembered exactly what to do in this instance and that I had no fear or anxiety about it. My hand played with his balls as my mouth worked his length. His hands found their way to my head but left almost instantly.

Working him a bit more intensely, I felt him pump into me and reach for my head again. His fingers curled into my hair for a second before again pulling away. I realized then that he was trying to let me control the motion and didn't want to scare me by being more forceful. Relaxing my throat, I took as much of him as I could and moaned around him, the sensation overwhelming him enough that his hands went back to my head. This time I put my hands around his arm and squeezed. I wanted to him know that it was okay, that I was enjoying this too.

My hands went back to his shaft and balls. His grip increased on my hair as his balls began to tighten in my hands. He groaned and released himself into my mouth. I kept my mouth still, letting my tongue flick against him until he was done doing my best to extend his pleasure. He let out a shuddering breath as I sat back on my heels and looked up at him.

Tank reached down for me and pulled me into his lap, pushing his tongue instantly into my mouth. His kiss was complete outpouring of his love. He retreated and cupped my cheek in his hand. "I love you, Stephanie."

He held me close to him and stood up, carrying me to the bed. He set me down and laid down next to me, his hands running caresses over my body. His eyes watched mine and I tried to relax, tried not to tense up at his attentions.

Leaning down slowly, he took a nipple into his mouth. The sensation made me moan and arch into him. He alternated his hand and mouth on my breasts. I was still nervous, but found that the pleasure was outweighing my anxiety.

Keeping his mouth on my nipple, his hand moved down my belly and reached the trim curls. I tensed when he touched me there and was instantly ashamed of my mind's reaction. He raised himself up on his elbow, his right hand on my cheek, the left resting on my lower abdomen.

"Did he use his hands on you?" It was the first time Tank had ever asked a specific question about the rape and I wasn't sure I wanted to answer it. His eyes were stormy as he waited for my answer and I couldn't decide if he was angry or hurt or sad.

I felt my cheeks warm as some shame settled into my mind. Tank's knuckles caressed my cheek. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about or ashamed of Steph."

A tear escaped my eye as I nodded. "Yes, he did, briefly." Tank's thumb wiped my tear and kissed the path it left on my face.

"I won't hurt you and if you need to stop just tell me, but if you'll let me maybe I can replace the bad memory with a good one." He gave me a dazzling smile and I felt myself relax knowing that he would do whatever I needed right now. "I love you, Stephanie."

He moved the hand on my abdomen lower again as I nodded and willed myself to relax. His fingers parted my lips and rubbed the wetness that was there around. Circling my clit he rubbed slowly, giving me pleasure and allowing me to get used to being touched intimately. My eyes slammed shut when he started to slip a thick finger inside me, my body and mind instantly remembering the last time this happened and the trauma that ensued.

"Open your eyes, Little Girl." Tank kept his hand still, not withdrawing from body. "Look at me so you know it's me who's touching you."

Letting out a breath through pursed lips, I opened my eyes to see him smiling at me. He slowly pumped his finger in and out of me, his eyes never leaving mine. I relaxed into the sensations overwhelming my body as my breathing got more rapid. Tank could sense that I was close, that I was enjoying his manipulation of my body and slipped another finger inside me. He curled his fingers inside me and sent me over the edge with a small scream.

My body quivered around him as he stroked me slowly, letting me ride out my orgasm. I looked up at his beautiful eyes and smiled, feeling like I'd just won some kind of immense victory. "Thank you." It seemed like an odd thing to say, but in this moment I was so thankful for him, his love, and his gentle care of body.

He nipped my nose and stretched out on his back, pulling me into his chest. "There's nothing I won't do for you, Stephanie."

I looked over his body, not really surprised to see that he was aroused again but uncertain of going forward, of having him inside me. "Is it okay if we just rest now?"

"Of course, let's take a little nap then maybe order some room service." He held me tighter to him and I relaxed into him.

I started to dose off, feeling like a teenager having her first sexual experience. Better than that though, because with Tank's help I was reclaiming my body from my rapist. I still had some battles to fight, but right now I felt like I was winning the war against the memory of what had been done to me.


	15. Chapter 15

_Continued thanks to Cristi0819, my incredible beta for her wisdom & support. Also, thanks to everyone who reads & comments on this story, I appreciate more than you know._

_**Chapter 15 - Tank's POV**_

Steph twitched and mumbled against my chest. It didn't seem like a full-blown nightmare, but it wasn't exactly a pleasant dream either. Her sleep had been much better in the last few weeks, with hardly a stirring at all and certainly no screaming episodes like right after the rape. Running my fingertips up her spine, I kissed her forehead. "I'm right here, Steph," I whispered into her hair, hoping that I could stave off any night terrors.

I regretted asking her questions about the rape last night. It was something I hadn't done previously partly because I didn't truly want to know and partly because I figured it was up to her to share if and when she wanted to share. At that moment though, it was so important to me to obliterate James Mathis from her mind and body. I was even more glad now that I had broken his fingers before we sent him off to his death.

Despite the knowledge of what he had done to her, I felt like the night was a success. It was as if we turned an important corner, not just in her healing but in our relationship. I wanted more of her, wanted to erase every bad memory of the violence that had been done to her and replace it with my love, but I could feel her hesitancy and I refused to push.

She stirred again in my arms and I could tell she was starting to wake up. I ran my hand on her cheek as she stretched and opened her eyes. "Good Morning." Her voice was raspy as she gave me a giant smile.

Squeezing her tighter to me, I kissed her lips gently. "Morning, Little Girl." She wiggled out of my arms and ran into the bathroom. Climbing out of bed, I changed into my jeans and a sweatshirt.

She came out of the bathroom surprised that I was already getting dressed. "I'm going to run down to the corner cafe and pick up some coffee and pastries for breakfast. How's that sound?" I figured she'd enjoy a treat and when she gave me a wide smile I knew I was right.

I strapped on my gun and picked up my wallet and phone. I pulled my extra weapon out of the nightstand drawer and set it by the phone making sure she saw it. She shouldn't have any trouble while I was gone, but I wasn't going to leave her here without any protection. "I've got my key for the room if you want to hop in the shower."

Nodding she stood on her toes and kissed me goodbye. "Something with chocolate would be nice," she giggled as I walked out the door.

At the coffee shop, I loaded up on chocolate for her. I got her the biggest mocha they had and a chocolate croissant, it was terribly unhealthy and normally even I wouldn't spoil her this much, but it felt right today. We were on a bit of a holiday after all.

Steph was sitting at the table when I got back in the room. She was lounging in my shirt, her hair wild and crazy around her face. "I wanted to eat before my shower, just in case I make a mess because I knew you'd get me something gooey."

I nodded and chuckled as I handed off the coffee and bag of treats. Laying out the napkins on the table, she gave me the bear claw as she bit into and moaned over her croissant. I watched her eat, amazed at how radiant she was and hoped that I was part of the reason behind her glow.

We had a relaxed morning, not being allowed to be back in the hospital until 10 AM for visiting hours. I slipped into the shower after Steph, needing to get clean as much as I needed to get away from her walking around in her towel. She was oblivious to the effect she was having on me and I needed to put some distance between us in order to control my urges.

Wrapped up in my own towel, I opened the bathroom door to see Steph standing in front of the mirror in her bra and panties. I groaned at her beauty causing her to turn around to look at me. She blushed and looked down at her feet. Her eyes worked their way back up my body slowly and when her eyes met mine it made my mouth run dry.

She licked her lips keeping my gaze with her amazing blue eyes. "When we get home, I'd like to hear more of those groans." Her cheeks tinted even redder at her forwardness and it drove me mad with desire.

Approaching her quickly, I put my hands on her waist and lifted her up to even our height. She giggled and wrapped her legs around my toweled waist, her hands cupping my cheeks. Our lips met in a hurry, our tongues immediately crossing parted lips and fighting for control. We pulled apart only when breathing become necessary.

"I can't wait to get you home." I kissed her nose and set her back down. The idea that we shared a home and a life together was still so very amazing to me and on some days still felt like a dream rather than a reality.

We got dressed and packed up the car deciding to drive to the hospital so we could just leave after visiting my father. I locked the car in the parking garage as Steph took my hand. Walking towards the elevator a man approached in our direction, I felt Steph's hand tighten on mine as she closed the small distance between us.

While she was recovering and reclaiming her life in leaps and bounds, she was still nervous around strangers. I hoped it would get better with time, but in the meantime I was glad to be the man she depended on. Letting go of her hand, I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and pulled her tighter to my side. Leaning over, I whispered into her ear, "I'm right here, Little Girl. No one will hurt you."

She let out a deep breath and squeezed my side with her arm. When the man passed us, I watched her turn her head slightly to make sure the stranger kept walking. I hated that she was so afraid and I longed for a way to make that better for her. Getting us into the elevator, I kept her tight against my side, wanting to give her whatever reassurance she needed.

"I'm trying to not be so nervous. I know you wouldn't let anyone hurt me. I know most people don't mean any harm, either." She shook her head and gave me a sad smile.

"Stephanie, you're doing wonderfully. I hope that I give you whatever security you need, but you don't have to apologize to me for being nervous considering everything you've been through." I rubbed her arms as I talked, hoping that my words were getting through.

Walking down the hall towards my father's room I noticed new guards were on shift. Letting go of Stephanie, I pulled my carrying permits from my back pocket. I watched the one guard look Steph over from head to toe and forced the growl back down my throat. Men checked her out all the time, but usually less obviously when I was standing right next to her.

The guard looked over my paperwork, nodded and handed it back to me. He looked at Steph and like last night, I informed him that she wasn't carrying. Again he nodded and rubbed his chin. He looked me in the eyes and then at Steph. "I'll need to pat her down."

I took a step closer to him then, not liking the way he looked at her and not wanting him to touch her, even though I knew he couldn't get away with anything inappropriate with me standing right here. Steph's hand encircled my wrist, stopping me from letting my temper slide a bit. "It's okay, Pierre."

She stood next to me and lifted her arms to her side as the guard approached her. I stepped behind him, wanting to keep my eyes on hers and ready to grab him if he even thought about letting his hands linger on her body. Surprisingly, she handled the pat down better than me. Her face didn't show any anxiety, again reminding me how very far she had come in her recovery.

My dad was awake and sitting up when we entered the room. Steph leaned over and kissed his cheek before taking the chair next to his bed. I watched the two of them talk for a few minutes, surprised at the ease with which they related. Steph always had the ability to talk with anyone, even criminals.

The relationship with my dad was strained. I didn't hate, him but I didn't exactly love him either. A year ago I probably wouldn't have come to visit him, but I was trying to at least be cordial with him. I sent money a few times a year to his prison account, but I only visited him on his birthday and just before Christmas. He called every now and then, but I purposely kept those conversations clipped. I just didn't know how to open up to him.

"Maybe Pierre can bring you to visit me next he comes." My dad's statement brought me out of my mental meanderings.

"No, Dad, I'm not bringing Stephanie to a prison." I was okay with bringing her the hospital to visit him, but I didn't need to see all the inmates checking her out in the visitation room.

She snapped her head up to look at me and I saw some irritation behind her eyes. I knew my caveman act was quickly pissing her off. "Why not? And I don't believe I'd need you to bring me." Her eyebrows furrowed as she looked at me.

Letting out a deep breath, I ran my hand over my face and head. I tried to control my possessive and overprotective nature as I met her eyes. If she was going to visit him in prison there was no way I would let her go alone. "Was just thinking of your safety, Little Girl. I'll take you with me, of course."

Her eyebrows relaxed at my words and I knew that I'd narrowly avoided rhino mode. Despite not wanting to make her mad, I was glad to see that side of her returning, glad to know she was willing to assert some independence and fight with me.

We talked with my dad for another hour and did make plans to visit him in a month. Steph kissed his cheek before saying goodbye. I shook his hand. It was the best gesture of affection I could provide him.

The drive home was made mostly in silence. I could see Steph watching me out of the corner of my eye. Her hand stayed on my body the entire time and I found myself full of desire for her. Stealing glances at her whenever the opportunity presented itself, I could tell that she was deep in thought, but her face was relaxed, her eyes seemed to have the same desire I was feeling.

Pulling into the garage, she grabbed the pizza we picked up on the way in and I grabbed our bags. I couldn't take my eyes off her butt and hips as she walked in front of me, setting the pizza box on the table. Leaving the bags in the laundry room, I found her standing at the table, her back resting on one of the chairs, as she watched me approach.

Running my knuckles down her cheek, I was captivated by her. "Thank you for going with me. I know things are tense between my dad and I, but I'm glad I went." My father was a terrible parent, but I was determined to be a better man, a better person than him.

Stephanie gave me a bright smile before pulling her bottom lip in between her teeth. I kept my hands on her face as I leaned in to kiss those tender lips. She moaned and flattened her hands on my back as my tongue slipped inside her mouth.

Letting my hands slide down her back, I wrapped them around her slender thighs and picked her up. She giggled just slightly as her legs entwined around me. "Bedroom," she whispered as her fingers clasped around my neck.

I nodded and carried her up the stairs, our lips exchanging gentle kisses of devotion. When I put her down on the bed, I had a moment of ache from losing that connection with her. I watched in awe as she took of her shirt, revealing her amazingly smooth and milky skin to me. Tearing my own shirt off, I lay down next to her on the bed, my hands running over her torso.

Her moans of pleasure as I cupped her perky breasts only served to increase my desire. Removing her bra, my lips immediately latched onto her nipples, her fingernails scraped lightly at my back as she arched into my attentions. My fingers found the buttons of her jeans and undid them. I pulled them off her and stood up next to the bed and just took in the beautiful sight before me. "You're gorgeous, Stephanie."

She blushed at my compliment. "Your pants, too."

I nodded but leaned over her, my fingers pulling her panties off slowly before removing my own pants and lying down next to her. Our skin touched everywhere and the desire made our skin so hot it felt like we might catch the bed on fire. She rubbed herself over my erection, causing me to groan.

The action made me stiffen just slightly allowing me to slow down just a bit. We were quickly moving into uncharted territory and I wanted to be absolutely sure she was ready for this. Rolling her on top of me, I held her face in my hands. "Steph?"

She held my gaze, her palms resting on my chest. "I want to, just slow."

Nodding, I moved to grab a condom out of the nightstand when her hand caught my wrist. "Just you and me, please. I can't get pregnant and I know disease isn't an issue. Just you replacing the bad memory with a good one." She repeated my words from last night and my heart swelled.

I started to roll her over, to pin her underneath me when I thought it might be too much. I worried that my large body over hers would be too frightening, too claustrophobic. Perhaps, if she stayed on top, she'd feel more in control.

"I want to be underneath you. I know you won't hurt me." She smiled as she accurately picked up on my unspoken questions.

My arms encircled her as I laid her down. Keeping my weight on my forearms, I kissed her forehead before moving down her face and kissing her lips. Her legs shifted, giving my wide body more room. Holding my weight off her and onto my forearms, I positioned myself at her center. I could feel the heat and wetness pooling there which only increased my desire. Forcing myself to move slowly I kept my eyes on hers.

She smiled and nodded, giving me the permission I was seeking to inch forward and slide into her a bit. I felt her body tense up immediately, denying me easy access. "Do you want to stop?" It would be incredibly difficult for me, but I wasn't going to push my way inside her until she was ready.

I watched her face as she closed her eyes, swallowed, and opened her eyes again. She smiled at me, her face slightly afraid but also determined. "No, no stopping." Her voice was breathless, but with her words I felt her body relax and open to me.

Groaning as I moved forward, she stretched around me, but it was a tight fit and she was still not completely relaxed. When my hips touched hers she winced, making me instantly worry that I was hurting her. "What's wrong?" I stayed still inside her, trying to let her body adjust to me.

"You're not exactly petite." She blushed and giggled forcing a low chuckle from me too. "Just give me a second." Her fingers caressed my cheeks as I felt her entire body release some tension and her walls relax around me. I followed her body's clues and started to move inside her.

We moved together slowly for a long time. When she started meeting my thrusts I increased my pace. She smiled at me as her fingernails dug into my back. I gave her some more of my weight, leaning down to whisper in her ear. "I love you, Stephanie."

I picked up my pace then, unable to hold back as she repeated my name like some kind of sacred mantra. Her body was squeezing me tightly, I could feel the waves of her orgasm beginning but could tell by her face that she was having trouble letting go. Using my thumb I circled her clit, hoping that by stimulating that bundle of nerves I could push her over the edge.

She moaned loudly, giving into the pleasure I wanted her to feel. I felt her quake as the release took over her body and pulling my own from me. I groaned as I spilled into her. My body was spent from the effort and pleasure, but my heart was incredibly filled as I thought about what she had given me and how far she had come.

I rolled onto my back, wanting to collapse and not smother her with my weight. She gravitated into my body, her torso resting across my chest as her face watched mine. Kissing my chin, her fingers played across my chest. "I love you, Pierre. Thank you for being so patient with me."

"It was worth the wait, Steph. You are always worth the wait." She blushed and laid her head down on me.

My fingers stroked her bare back as we rested, each of us trying to get our breathing back to normal. I didn't expect that this would cure all her fears and anxieties but I knew that it was a huge step in letting her reclaim her life and her body. As we moved forward, I knew there would be ups and downs but I also knew that we'd tackle them together. After this weekend, I also knew that she would be my rock as much as I was hers.


	16. Chapter 16

_So much thanks to my incredible beta Cristi0819, I don't know that I could have finished this story without you. You rocked my world constantly with your help and advice, thank you is not enough._

_**Chapter 16 - Steph's POV**_

Tank's voice was calling to me as I ran down the street towards his house. I was pulling my jacket around me as my feet throbbed from running for miles without shoes. Despite the pain, I knew I had to keep running. I knew that Tank's house and voice represented safety and comfort.

"Stephanie, shh. It's okay, I'm right here. Open your eyes." Tank's firm voice broke through the fog of my nightmare, forcing me to open my eyes and let out a gasp. I sat up and met his eyes and could feel tears building. He pulled me onto his lap, his arms squeezing me tightly.

"I was running to you." I sighed into his embrace, relaxing into the security of his strong arms. "I haven't had such a bad nightmare in a while." A tear slid down my cheek at the admission. Tucking my head under his chin, I tried to move closer to him while hiding my embarrassment over my continuing struggles.

He kissed my forehead and gave me a gentle squeeze. "It's normal, Steph. I think you're dealing with a little extra anxiety this week too and so your mind is just trying to deal with it all. I'm glad to know that even in your dreams you run to me for safety."

Letting out a deep breath, I tried to shake off my nightmare as I snuggled into him more. I was dealing with more anxiety this week. I'd made the decision with the support of Dr. Lewis and my friends to go to The BlueMoon tonight. It'd been six months since I was attacked there and it felt necessary to remember that it wasn't the place that hurt me and that in order to truly let go of the remaining fear, I had to face down the bar where my nightmare started.

Tank was apprehensive about the decision but supported me and let me know in no uncertain terms that he was going along. In the end, most of RangeMan wanted to come along tonight as well. Most of the Merry Men had figured out exactly what had happened to me. Their natural intuitive natures and experience meant that there was no secret-keeping. However, none of them ever pushed me to share details about the rape. They supported me and made sure I had whatever security and space I needed. If anything, they had all become even more protective of me and as I slowly recovered I had to get them used to allowing me more contact with the outside world.

Kissing Tank's chin, I relaxed my hold and sat back a little to look at him. "I suppose I woke you, too." It was Saturday and while he was always awake before me, he had a late night last night and I hated that my nightmares meant lack of sleep for him too.

"I was already up, just kinda lazing around when the nightmare started." His large hands cupped my cheeks before he placed a quick kiss to my nose. "I'll start the coffee." I watched as he pulled a sweatshirt over his bare chest before leaving me alone in the bedroom.

Slipping some sweatpants on underneath Tank's t-shirt, I made my way to the bathroom. I stood in front of the shower for a few minutes debating about whether or not I should climb in. I felt dirty, but I knew it was just an after effect of the nightmare and that the anxiety would lessen if I would just sit with it for a minute. Washing my hands, I did my best to shake off my anxiety and went to the kitchen.

Tank noticed my rubbing hands and anxiety immediately. He gave me a small smile and pulled me into his chest, kissing the top of my head. "I wish I could ease those nightmares for you, Little Girl."

I smiled into his chest and rubbed his back. "I'll be okay."

"We can cancel tonight, you know, do it another day." His voice was hesitant and I know he was warring with trying not to smother me and trying to protect me at all costs at the same time.

Stepping back, I took his hands in mine and looked into his dark chocolate eyes. "I need to do it tonight, it's time. Yes, I'm anxious and afraid but you'll be there along with most of RangeMan, I'll be safe."

He chuckled and nodded. We sat at the table and drank our coffee, looking at the morning paper. I watched him for a few minutes when a nagging question worked its way through my brain and wouldn't be denied. "Can I ask you a question, Pierre?"

Looking up from his paper, his eyes met mine, but his eyebrows furrowed in concern. "Of course, Steph. You should know that you can ask me anything, anytime."

I knew that. He never put me or my questions aside, but neither of us talked about our feelings much. "How do you feel about going to The BlueMoon tonight?"

"I have mixed feelings." He frowned but took my hand in his giving it a gentle squeeze. "I'm proud of you because you're so very determined to recover from what happened. Your strength never ceases to amaze me." He smiled at his compliments of me and I could feel myself blushing, not feeling worthy of how he saw me.

He let out a deep breath and his face changed, his eyes grew stormy. "Going there tonight sickens me though, only because it reminds me of how much you were hurt and that I didn't protect you from that trauma."

"There's no way you could have known or protected me, Tank." I knew he carried some burden and guilt because of my attack, but I didn't want that. I didn't blame him at all.

"Rationally, I know that Steph. Emotionally, I struggle with how you were hurt and how I wasn't there when you needed me. If I had done more digging I may have seen how Robbins would be dangerous to you. "

"But you were there. You've been here with me for months. As for Robbins, there was no way to know about his sick habits, I don't blame you in anyway. Besides, if you had done a ton of digging I'd have been pissed and you know it." He chuckled seeing the truth behind my statements.

I moved to kneel in front of his chair, my hands resting on his thighs. "It's been because of your strength holding me up all these months that I'm even able to get out of bed let alone function at a reasonably normal level. You're always there when I need you."

His hand cupped my face, his thumb caressing my cheek. "I love you, Stephanie. There's nothing I won't do for you and I'm trying to let go of my guilt."

Leaning into his hand, I closed my eyes. "I love you, too. I suppose we both have a little recovering to do yet."

"We'll do it together, how's that sound?"

I giggled and squeezed the hand on my cheek. "It's a deal."

The day was spent doing a whole lot of avoiding and denial. We kept ourselves busy with normal domestic cleaning that all weekends seem to need. After dinner, Tank let me shower first knowing that it would take me longer to get ready.

He was dressed and ready long before I had my hair dry and mascara applied. I dressed in a denim skirt and red blouse. My clothing had taken a definite turn towards the more conservative end of fashion since the rape. I knew that my clothing didn't cause my attack, didn't give my rapist a reason to hurt me, but still it had changed how I dressed and I felt the need to cover up more than ever before.

I was smoothing my skirt out in front of the mirror, my hands nervously running over my clothing. Tank appeared behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me into him. "You are gorgeous. I'll be with you the whole time." He kissed my shoulder and looked at me in the mirror again.

Leaning my back into his chest, I nodded. "I couldn't do it if you weren't." It was the truth. While I was determined to do this, his support was what gave me the necessary strength.

We made the drive to the bar in silence. I chewed on my lip the entire way. Tank kept my hand in his on his thigh, his thumb occasionally rubbing mine passing on a little comfort and security.

When Tank pulled into the parking lot, my hands began to wring. I wanted to do this, but the nervousness was threatening to overwhelm me. Tank got out and came to my side opening the door and pulling me into him the second I had my belt off. His hands ran gentle passes up and down my spine as he whispered into my ear. "We don't have to stay any longer than you want, Little Girl. I'm here, most of RangeMan is here no harm will come to you, I promise."

I nodded into his chest, my fingers grasping as his side while I tried to take in some deep calming breaths. "I want to do this, I just need a minute."

"Take all the time you need, Steph." He kept me tight against him but I felt his head shaking. I figured he was waving off one of our friends wanting to offer me some support.

Leaning back from his chest, I took one of his massive hands in mine and let out my breath. "Okay, let's do this."

He smiled and kissed my forehead, helping me down from the seat. "You're amazing, Stephanie."

Walking through the parking lot I saw it was mostly full of black vehicles, including Ranger's Porsche and I wondered if the Merry Men had left any room inside for regular patrons. Stepping inside the loud bar, I saw it was full of strangers, but also friends. Joe was here with his girlfriend, Connie, MaryLou, Lula, Ranger, and most of the Merry Men with their dates. Their support was endearing and overwhelming. I wrapped my arm around Tank's waist as he steered us towards a table with the group.

After I took a seat between Tank and Bobby, Les approached first. His green eyes twinkled before he leaned down to kiss my forehead. "What can I get you to drink, Beautiful?"

"Just a club soda with lime." I hadn't had any alcohol since the attack and didn't think I could handle getting tipsy at the bar where my nightmare started.

Les nodded and ran off to the bar when Tank leaned down to whisper in my ear. "You can drink Steph, I won't let you out of my sight."

"I know, but I just want to remember this night sober, know that I stood up to my own nightmare without chemical help."

He kissed my temple pulling me into his side. "Again, you're amazing."

It took me a little while but I eventually relaxed, dancing with my friends even laughing. All of it helped me release the anxiety and allowed me to feel like I was moving on, like something of great significance was happening by staring down the horrible memory that started here.

Dancing a slow number with Tank, I started to feel exhausted as the club sodas worked through my bladder. While I was having fun in the bar, the thought of going to the ladies room and the hallway where Mathis grabbed me was more frightening that I had imagined. I tensed in Tank's arms, something he, of course, picked up on immediately.

"What's wrong?" He held me close but I felt his muscles tense up and knew without looking at his face that he wore a worried expression.

"I need to use the restroom and I'm terrified of going back there. He grabbed me in that hallway." My words were coming fast as I grew more overwhelmed.

"I'll go with you and stand outside the door." He placed a kiss on the top of my head.

Letting go of my hold on him, I met his eyes and nodded. He held my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze before letting me walk into the restroom alone. Washing my hands, I met my own eyes in the mirror and realized that I was doing better than okay. Despite a few moments of anxiety, this night was a success and I felt like because of it I would have less nightmares going forward.

True to his word, Tank was waiting right outside the door for me. I took his hand as my eyes surveyed the hall and back door where I was grabbed and pulled outside. Tank watched me but didn't speak as my mind raced with memories. "He grabbed me here and dragged me out that back door."

Tank's free hand cupped my cheek as his eyes raced through emotions of anger, hurt, and concern. "Want to walk back there and come back in the front? I'll be with you, no one will hurt you."

He was giving me another opportunity to release my fear and while I could tell that he was anguished over what had happened, he also knew what I needed to heal. I nodded and let him lead me towards the door. My hands shook, but I was also filled with excitement as we walked through the parking lot and back inside the bar. In that simple walk, I felt the last hold Mathis had on my memory being released.

I wasn't naive enough to believe there wouldn't be any struggles as I continued to heal, but I knew that because of tonight's activities and Tank's amazing presence at my side that I was indeed on the road to recovery. It was because of Tank's unending tenderness towards me and the rage he unleashed on the men that victimized me that gave me freedom from a nightmare and a promise of a loving future.

_**The End**_

_**Thanks to everyone who read, commented on, and supported me and this story. I appreciate all of your kind words so very much!**_


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